i wish to be colored awesome.
-Application-
Name: jey.
Nicknames: jay. kozi.
Age: 22
Location: fl
Sexuality: androgynous
-What do you like about your friends/best friend?
they listen. they talk. they laugh. they make me laugh. they cry. they hug. they complete everything in my life that has a void.
-Would you rather have one close friend for the rest of your life or a group of friends?
one is the best. one that understands you fully, and accepts every little thing about you. but sometimes its nice to have a group of friends who you can mess around with and have a good time.
-What awesome traits do you have that should get you accepted into the community?
i cant spell hhah. i can touch my tongue to my nose. i whistle very well, even with a mid lip ring. im very openminded and it takes alot to get me upset.
-What three communities are you most active in?
randompictures orlandofl illustrators
-If you could do anything to Flavor Flav, what would you do?
kick him in the nuts. why should i be nice. what has he ever done to me.
-If you could have wild sex with any person in the world, who would it be and where?
johnathan rhys meyers. and anywhere i could get his sexy ass naked! yum.
-If you could have dinner with any person, dead or alive, who would it be and why?
my grandmother. i never got to know her as well as i had always hoped in life. dinner, coffee, cigarette and a walk would be heaven.
-If you could kill one person, celebrity or non-celebrity who would it be?
this guy i used to work with. his drug problems, irritation, racism, homophobia and hugeass ego was UNBEARABLE. i threatened him one time (yes, he got me THAT MAD) and he left me alone after that. shot daggers through my eyes wishing they were real. bah.
-If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would it be and why?
id go back home. i was raised in Germany during childhood (spelling problems blamed on that reason) and would love to go back and see everything that used to bring rainbows to my heart. it would make my heart clam and happy.
-Favorite childhood memory:
waking up on mornings i didnt have to go to school. opening my eyes and seeing the sunlight though the white half drawn blinds. my cat sleeping soundlessly next to me. breathing in and out. in and out. just laying there..looking around at all the shades and colors created by the morning sun..and smiling.
-What are your views on...[pick five]
Self-mutilation-
its all in your mind. and i have been there. depression, and such, is a very hard thing to go through. but cant be stopped sometimes. alot of times you feel whatever is making you feel that way is your fault. and in that, want to punish yourself. .. then agian, some people do it for fun. i used to cut myself when i was bored in school. very deep cuts that i still have scars from. that was just an interest in blood and gore, nothing deep or mind numbing. heh. just pure boredom with a paperclip in my hand.
Gun Control-
Abortion:
Internet dating:
i say all love is good love. but, speaking from MASS experience, you never know who people really are. and thats the down right truth. doesnt matter if youve known them for years online. people can lie for years. i know. if you do end up 'falling in love' with someone online, be very very careful the first time you meet. outside. populated. and never get in a car or other type with them. dont let them know where you live, or your personal info untill you are completely sure you can trust them. .. on the lighter note, i have met many people online in person. and am astounded by them as people, along with who i know them as online. intother words, my best friend in the world and i met online years back. but in meeting her, i knew instantly i prob would have never gone up to her and said anything if i had just met her at a show or something. shes a beauty, but doesnt look like someone who would hang out with a tattoo, pierced weirdo looking person like myself. - meeting people online first gives you the ability to love them for them.
Substance abuse:
Stem-cell Research
The War on Terror
frankly i think its bull. there are no weapons. we, as a nation, were told one thing but as it ends up, it was a lie. :shrug: i hate that we have men and women over there fighting, but as long as they believe in what they are doing, believe that it is making a difference in the world for the better, all the power to you. Bush is not my pres. i take no blame for his office. and i disagree with most everything he does and says. and yes, i laugh at him behind his back, constantly. ..and would to his face, if i didnt have the fear of getting shot. ;D
The Death Penalty
an eye for an eye.
someone pokes out my eye, in the middle of bleeding all over them and the unreal pain, i will stab them with a fork. punch them in the face. and purposely bleed on them. all while dialing 911.
i agree with the death penalty. i can see where people would feel better knowing the person is dead who killed their loved one. and as barbaric as this might sound, i think that if the killer tortured the murdered before actually killing them..that they should be tortured themselves, in the same fashion, or worse for punishment sake. being put to death is too easy. if a murderer is so eager to be killed, i think we should let them live. maybe im just morbid.
"One nation under god" in the pledge of allegiance
in the time that this was written, the christian religion was the reason these people were even here in the first place. i understand it due to this. but times change, many things change. and in that, i do believe that they should take this out of the pledge. mainly for the reason that we are now a country of everyone. everyone and everyone is now allowed here. allowed to have their own religions, colors, ideas etc. for respect of all, including the christians, i believe we should remove it.
Evolution vs. Creation Science
Legalization of Marijuana
-What do you want to be when you "grow up", or if you are already grown up, what did you want to be when you were younger?:
the idea of being grownup always changed. but i never truly wanted to be anything when i grew up. i was always a child who enjoyed being where i was and experiencing what i was doing at the time it was being done. same with now. id be the most happy having my own house and raising children with someone i love, but easy dreams like that hardly ever come true. so i just enjoy the now. being with whom i am with right now. in the job i am in right now. and live day to day. expecting nothing, but life the next day. and love.
-What is one of your hobbies that you really love and why?
i wouldnt call Painting a "hobby" but its something i love doing.
when i paint, it releases my soul. it allows it to dance on the canvas. ice skating over the paints, creating movement and textures that it had never been able to before. speaking words in pictures never heard before. beauty. love. life.
-Name three of your interests:
traverser, out back counting stars, emotional masochism
-Something you know now, that in retrospect, you wish you'd known "then"
how a certain someone has, and had, feelings for me.
-Inner most desires:
to live. to love. and to become light.
-Describe yourself in 5 words:
comforting. humble. maniac. kind. crude. rainbows.
Top three books that you feel were written about you and why:
Book 1: Choke
Author: Palahniuk
Explanation: the mans mother is in a mental hospital. he meets a nurse there. they fall inlove. he thinks shes married. meanwhile, hes working with a friend at a colonial times theme park. and often goes with this friend to restaurants and pretends to choke to get free food and endless money from people who have 'saved' him. ...hes also a sex addict and gets into really bad situations.
(this book is by the same man who wrote Fight Club. its got that same kind of strange feel to it. it relates to my absurd and obscene side)
Book 2: Lord of the Flies
Author: Golding
Explanation: children crash on an island. make pacts and groups to live. one kid goes crazy alone and ends up with a sad fate. other kids go tribal, try and take over everything, but only managing to destroy almost everything and everyone. many people die in very traumatic ways.
(one of my most fave books for a longass time. simon was always my favorite character. it shows the trial and error, life and death of society as a whole.)
Book 3: Man Without a Country
Author: Vonnegut
Explanation: life and times of a man whos lived for way freakin longer than i might ever expect to live. makes me laugh. makes me think. makes me question authority and life as we know it.
(ive yet to finnish it. but every page i turn makes me love it more.)
Top five songs that make the soundtrack of your life and why
Song 1: No Rain
Artist: Blind Melon
Why: this is the simple truth and idea of my life. "all i can say is that my life is pretty plain. i like watching the puddles gather rain."
Song 2: Change
Artist: Blind Melon
Why: it helps me wake up, and realize life isnt always how its gonna be. things will change, but in the end everythings gonna be alright.
Song 3: The Observer (Unnamed Track)
Artist: Traverser
Why: the first time i heard this song, was with the band themselves. sitting on their couch, and hearing it as new as their ears were. i began to cry inside. die and be reborn. something about it makes my soul sing. and i love it. "and weve all been waiting patiently, for a simple sign of reckoning. and weve all been wondering quietly, how long to wait."
Song 4: High
Artist: Feeder
Why: ive had this dream. long before the song was though of. when i was a child. i had the dream they speak of in the song. everytime i hear it, it brings me back to that bliss of a dream. beautiful.
Song 5: Thirty-Three
Artist: Smashing Pumpkins
Why: the sadness and melancholy drone of his voice reminds me of days deep in my depression walking through the cemetery alone in the cold. beautiful, yet so..so sad. dead outside, but a living breathing soul, somewhere beneath. "Tomorrow’s just an excuse away. so I pull my collar up and face the cold.. on my own."
Top three movies you should have starred in and why:
Movie: Velvet Goldmine
Why: i have this ultimate love for glam and glitter and strange love.
Movie: Peter Pan (2003)
Why: the idea of being young forever, living and bleeding as a child. but never loving, and in that, never knowing pain...sounds almost blissful, yet so so sad all the same.
Movie: Legends of the Fall
Why: the character of Tristan is my ultimate character. the character i would love to play anytime, anywhere. his pain. his love. his life. his death. he is pure and meaningful in everything he does. its ultimate pain and beauty, all the same.
-Do you consider yourself unique? Why?
i dont really. because i am myself. so i see myself the same as i always have. but most other people do explain me as strange and/or unusual. having grown up in europe cause i difference in view on life i believe.
-What are some characteristics you admire in yourself & why?
i am very open minded and accepting. loving and nurturing. kind and comforting.
-Are you tired of filling out this survey?
not as of yet. ive taken some breaks here and there i have to admit due to work and time regulations.
-Is it worth it?
course. i enjoyed it either way. thinking about things in ways you normally wouldnt is a very healthy thing id say.
-If we give you no's, will you bitch and cry about it? If you do, do you care that we might ban you because you obviously didn't read the rules?
uhm..no. im def not gonna bitch and moan. id like to get in. but if life has me not, then i guess not.
-How did you hear about this community?
was looking for places to post fliers on local music comms, and came across this one by accident. i liked your idea on colors and such, so i decided to go ahead and fill it out. i also enjoyed the app. its not like every other app out there that has the same kind of questions over and over again. you give a choice and take 'fave movies' and such to another level. i like that.
-Please take this time to rack up some brownie points and kiss our asses.
your layout and mod showcase on info is very nicely done. also the fact that you dont ask for a picture. i have no problem showing a picture of myself, but getting to know someones personality first is always a highpoint in my book.
-Word Association. Answer with the first word or phrase that pops into your head
Barney: smoochy.
Neck: bite.
Fickle: sandwich.
Freedom: lies.
Sky: falling.
Suffocate: beauty.
Run: fall.
United: star trek.
Wind: life.
Fire: ultimate pain.
Cave: batman.
G: funk.