ok so i seem to be doing a bit better now....thaaaaank goddddddd. those were three of the worst days i've had in ages. i was actually psychologically depressed, which is almost never the case. crikey. anyway i almost danced just before so that's a good sign ( Read more... )

you know what? i've realised that i've had cfs for sometihing like 9 years. so miserable. last two days have been hell. just been wishing i could get out of this body. it hurts. laying on the counch all day wanting to cry. i'm actually starting to get depressed. today i was wishing i could die. hooray. i just can't believe that my body is failing ( Read more... )

mmm i make good coffee ( Read more... )

well i seem to be depressed. or maybe i'm just really sick. i can't seem to type very well, even pressing the buttons down is too hard. i'm kinda feeling like everything's fucked. to be honest i feel like dying ( Read more... )

well i seem to have lost the..... whatever it was.. intense emotion... from a few minutes back. and am not particularly... word...enabled... but anyway. i feel the need to say this ( Read more... )

morning. (again, relatively speaking). the allure of coffee and cake is growing stronger yet. it was 5am. and i was laying down to go to sleep... and then i realised how... freaking...hungry... i was. but it was post-5am. that's really... the cut off. in my mind. for when one night ends and the morning begins. so sleep i did. and this morning.. ( Read more... )

i'm feelinggggg..... rather social. feeling like being out... talking to people. i'm kind of in.... even mode. cruisin'.. you know? feeling quite square. square, but with rounded edges. and a not-quite-solid, not-quite-liquid goo inside. which jiggles around, much to my joyful amusement ( Read more... )

yuuup. and not only long... but BIG. felt like a huge sleep. awesome. and guess what? feeling a whole lot better, would you believe?? coughs so far is zero. the vampyric amoebas seem to have crept back from my delicate cell structures to their forlorn coffins beneath the carpet. perhaps i shall live. oh don't worry, the remedial binge shall ( Read more... )

ouch! let's not get too in-depth and specific here. all i mean to say is... well, recent posts would have one believing that i'm in some kind of depression. not true at all. one thing that keeps me posative and.... thankful.. about and for the present situation is... that even when i feel like shit, i still feel happy. or at least... content enough ( Read more... )

outlook: -3.5 [half a step removed from neuro-nuclear apocalypse ( Read more... )