It's strange to get people's responses to the first part, because in my head, it's still all one piece, but it's good because it is helping me focus my thoughts and intentions for the second half. Maybe I will finally finish it! (It's almost done, it just isn't RIGHT)
Yiiiiiiiiiiiiiiikes! I knew that Roger was an emotionally manipulative dick with an unhealthy interest in Noel and no sense of boundaries, but clearly I underestimated his ability to be creepy and vindictive. From the minute he started taking advantage of Noel's state to start rubbing his leg, I started getting this heavy feeling of dread in my chest
( ... )
As per usual, you hit several nails on the head before I actually put the nails in place... I am curious how the next chapter will affect your perception of this one, but I can also assure you that your response will affect the next chapter! It is so close to being done but I haven't quite been able to nail a few things down and your review helped bring into focus what was getting me hung up.
I'm always happy to help you focus! Even if I have no idea what I'm doing. ;)
But I will look forward to the next chapter. I always enjoy it when something can challenge my perceptions, or go somewhere I didn't anticipate, and it feels like there's the potential for so many different things here, with so many different underlying emotions. So if it makes me look back at this with new eyes, I'm up for that!
"Noel wanted it to sound threatening, but it was an airy whisper". Ugh, you know you are in trouble! Connie, I might be slightly under the influence of last night's vampire movie, Only Lovers Left Alive, which reminded me of High Art in some scenes, and now this chapter! I never thought I'd be connecting these dots. Amazing! The combination of Noel's vulnerable state and Roger's creeping creepiness made me squirm with fear and frustration. Noel knows exactly what's going on but can barely do a thing to help himself, he can't even raise his voice. Even his internal panic was stifled. (As was mine!) I love that Roger's moves happen on the floor of a bathroom, parallels something low in his intent, something grimey. And it's so good how Noel notices that Roger is attractive even as he's hatin' on him with all his might. Snake in the grass! The cheap-drug-high mood you capture here is so far from the glamorous scene Noel had in mind. Like, he wasn't supposed to be dealing with all those inconvenient insecurities when he's supposed to
( ... )
Damn, that is a well written review! I am so into the story you described. Thank you, because you really described the feeling I was going for. I honestly couldn't have said why I set it in a bathroom, and I kept debating, but you hit the nail on the head. It's grimy and low and there is no better sign that you are totally out of control than being willing to lie on a bathroom floor. Thank you so much for your amazing comment. As a lousy reviewer, I really value the ability to make a review it's own piece of art.
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But I will look forward to the next chapter. I always enjoy it when something can challenge my perceptions, or go somewhere I didn't anticipate, and it feels like there's the potential for so many different things here, with so many different underlying emotions. So if it makes me look back at this with new eyes, I'm up for that!
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