Prediction and action

[conradin]

The other day my daughter and I were at the park. This park has a favourite swing of ours. Current, most of the play equipment in the park is being replaced, so what was once a less popular playground was bussling on this occasion

Comments

[anonymous]

Sounds like you made her aware of the issue, and gave her the chance to make her own response. Then you acted in accordance with what you felt was the right thing for you to do on your own account(by pushing you were also in a sense occupying the swing) thus modeling 'doing what you think is right'.

Perhaps as well as trying to predict what the other kids wanted you could have encouraged her to ask them, "Would you like a turn?". I find "drawing the line between when you bow to what you perceive are the needs and wants of others", hard because I often don't actually make sure my perceptions are correct by asking directly (if it's possible).

Regardless, I think what is most important is that you teach/demonstrate to your kids that these things are dilemmas that need to be worked through, even adults don't have neat answers and sometimes everyone gets it wrong.

[samara_47]

I agree with Anonymous (?) , you don't want to be overly giving to others because that gives people a chance to take advantage, yet you don't want to be selfish either so asking if the other kids wanted a turn would be the more balanced option.