Hi Cher! I'm totally crushing on you even though I know you've got a boyfriend and I've got a girlfriend and wow there're so many reasons this is a bad idea but you're funny and cute and girly and aaaaagh all my buttons are being pushed at the same time, it's not fair. I also totally suspect that I've been semi-successful in getting you to consider experimentation, which isn't helping. I'll be using every fiber of my being to keep myself from making a move. We'll see if it's enough!
I know it was. About 90% of what I do is a bad idea, probably! But hi, honey. ♥ I love you and whoa that was a little out of the blue but, what the Hell, it's true, so hey. Some people might say I'm not the best in the world at showing it, and they might be right sometimes--I admit I'm kinda bad at this, but still! I'm just...simultaneously thrilled just to know you, and terrified of what might happen when camp ends because I know it has to someday and I don't want us to end when it does. I know I say that I don't think about that, but I do. A lot.
Also, look, honey, I can understand the thing with Mello, really. Mello and I argue sometimes, we're not always the best of friends, but we are friends, and I think he's a basically likeable if incredibly messed-up guy. But Near? What the fuck, Chisame. Sometimes I can barely convince myself that he's a human being, emotionally speaking. I have never, ever understood how anyone could be attracted to that. I tried to like him, and maybe before I knew him very well, I did. But
( ... )
. . . Heh. I can't really explain it, you know? I know you guys hate each other. I'm not sure whether or not you believe me when I say that neither of them is a threat, but I'll say it again. Mello's--Mello, and Near's a friend and sure I find him attractive SOMETIMES, when he's not being a smug little BITCH what but if he ever approached me for anything like a date or relationship I'd be terrified! Oh hey I guess that truth serum's still kinda working on me.
Yeah, I know. I do trust you about that, but I don't trust Near. I worry sometimes that he'd try to, you know, run interference to get at me. Which sounds horribly paranoid, but hello, he's a screwed-up, emotionally retarded genius who doesn't like me, I feel like I have a right to be at least a little worried.
Yeah, I know. And you know, Rey, there used to be a time when that advice from you would have me drinking every soda I ran across just to spite you, but those days are long past! I really like you. I also feel bad for you, because while I'm sure I don't know ALL the details of why you're so fucked up, I've got enough of a picture to, well, sympathize. I hope you don't find that condescending! I don't mean it like that! But geez, man. The future's so dark I gotta turn on floodlights.
If there's one thing I still find skeevy about you, it's your deal with the Chairman. I know he was some important figure in your life, but he scares the Hell out of me, and I'm hoping that camp will somehow act to mend your issues and maybe balance your perspective on him a little.
That would explain it, and also explain why I'm about to say I don't really know you yet but I think you've got a nice body. Your personality seems a little off-putting, though, so I probably won't hit on you too much--the phallic object fixation in particular lowers my interest!
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Also, look, honey, I can understand the thing with Mello, really. Mello and I argue sometimes, we're not always the best of friends, but we are friends, and I think he's a basically likeable if incredibly messed-up guy. But Near? What the fuck, Chisame. Sometimes I can barely convince myself that he's a human being, emotionally speaking. I have never, ever understood how anyone could be attracted to that. I tried to like him, and maybe before I knew him very well, I did. But ( ... )
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If there's one thing I still find skeevy about you, it's your deal with the Chairman. I know he was some important figure in your life, but he scares the Hell out of me, and I'm hoping that camp will somehow act to mend your issues and maybe balance your perspective on him a little.
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