What is the point anymore? Why do I feel the way I do? I obviously should not feel anything, but I still do. I wish I could take these feelings away because they are causing me nothing, but grief. Dammit!

I've been super busy lately. I haven't gotten much rest. My dreams will continue to be haunted by indecisiveness and assholes. I move along taking each step day-by-day. My legs are definitely feeling really heavy right now. To anyone I have not contacted, I am sorry, but I have been super busy. I can't stomach much more of anything anymore. The ( Read more... )

In the middle of bad cinema you appeared ever so graceful. The white you wore showing your innocence, your naivety if you will. You floated on the screen. I felt nauseated, but damn well intrigued by your presence. As if I were a child looking into a candy store for the first time and impulse and instinct take place. I wanted to fly into the screen ( Read more... )

I saw A History Of Violence today. I cried. It made me think and it brought up memories and I cried.

I can't lie. There is a hole in my life. That leaves me feeling like killing. The sound of my voice. The shrill screams are passing quite as fast as they used to. I'm 22. And I feel like I've tried everything. I can't die, some force keeps holding me up. It doesn't take a very smart man. In succession I need you to want me not to want me. You won't ( Read more... )

Boy your just a stupid bitch and girl your just a no good dick. She would always sing that part aloud. I miss her. I miss her ( Read more... )

Well, I woke up just now. I don't really know how I feel. I feel alright I guess, but I think I just have nostalgia. I woke up feeling nostalgic. Yesterday, made me kind of sad. I don't like that. I miss her, even though, I just saw her yesterday. I had so much to tell her, but I feel like I must bite my tongue. I hate that feeling. Anyway, I feel ( Read more... )

Well, after my post today I went on through the day a bit mopey. I took my computer test finally and passed with an 86. Yay me! Anyways, after that I drove home with my iPod on shuffle. Man, what weird coincidence, but every song that was played portayed part of my life now. I need to stop paying so much attention to the lyrical content of songs ( Read more... )

I woke up today with no ambition. In fact, I forgot to eat breakfast, but it makes no difference to me. Anyway, I have to go to class in a few. I just wanted to pop in and lay a fresh mind on you all, it's really funny because that is what I am lacking right now. Well, I dreamed a lot last night, but I can't remember what I did dream. I wish I did ( Read more... )

I just thought of something. I keep posting the word "need" and I have to stop. I don't want to be dependent of other people. I shouldn't treat other people like means to an end. I should treat people as the ends. I would get better responses from people and I would grow within myself if I treat other people better. Just a random thought. I need to ( Read more... )