Seekrit essay of smuttage
Handed over to Professor Snape Saturday evening, Nov. 15th
The topic of this essay is the experience of the last session, what I felt and how I reacted to what was done to me. The new experiences that I was subjected to were to be tied up over a surface, and to get melted wax dropped onto my body.
I have felt before that being restrained has been something that I've reacted positively too, but then it has been by hands holding me. This was a different experience since there were ropes, and both my hands and my feet were restrained. To be made almost immobile over a surface was incredibly arousing. I felt helpless, but since I trust You, it also felt very good. I had no control, and was in fact not allowed any, in a much more concrete way than usual. I don't understand why this feels good to me, but I think I feel safe. I realise that I should feel exposed and at Your mercy, and I did as well, but when looking back at it there was also the sense of being safe in Your power.
The wax being dripped on my naked skin was something very different. At first there was a burning pain as one would expect, but very soon after I felt cold all over my body, as if the contrast was made so much clearer. It raised gooseflesh. As more waxed was dripped on me, I noticed there was a subtle pleasure that built up. It wasn't clear that it came from the pain, or sensation, but it moved through me after every drop. It was very arousing as well, in a strangely non-specific way. It didn’t come from anywhere in particular, it just increased and made me want more.
I enjoyed both these experiences very much, and would like to be subjected to them again, should it please You to do so.
Being used while still tied up was extremely intense as well. In a way I felt grateful that You wanted me that way, that You found me pleasing. I enjoy being under Your control, in a way I never realised when I asked for it. It makes me feel calm and as if someone cares.
The topic of this essay is the experience of the last session, what I felt and how I reacted to what was done to me. The new experiences that I was subjected to were to be tied up over a surface, and to get melted wax dropped onto my body.
I have felt before that being restrained has been something that I've reacted positively too, but then it has been by hands holding me. This was a different experience since there were ropes, and both my hands and my feet were restrained. To be made almost immobile over a surface was incredibly arousing. I felt helpless, but since I trust You, it also felt very good. I had no control, and was in fact not allowed any, in a much more concrete way than usual. I don't understand why this feels good to me, but I think I feel safe. I realise that I should feel exposed and at Your mercy, and I did as well, but when looking back at it there was also the sense of being safe in Your power.
The wax being dripped on my naked skin was something very different. At first there was a burning pain as one would expect, but very soon after I felt cold all over my body, as if the contrast was made so much clearer. It raised gooseflesh. As more waxed was dripped on me, I noticed there was a subtle pleasure that built up. It wasn't clear that it came from the pain, or sensation, but it moved through me after every drop. It was very arousing as well, in a strangely non-specific way. It didn’t come from anywhere in particular, it just increased and made me want more.
I enjoyed both these experiences very much, and would like to be subjected to them again, should it please You to do so.
Being used while still tied up was extremely intense as well. In a way I felt grateful that You wanted me that way, that You found me pleasing. I enjoy being under Your control, in a way I never realised when I asked for it. It makes me feel calm and as if someone cares.