(Untitled)

[cosmicchrist]

all will rest

graveyard, small, and out of place
disturbed by the dead inside

gray tombstones make shadows on the grass
their names and numbers barely visible

a squeal not that of a injured pig
but of the injured masses
a roar not that of beast
but of engine,
rouse the ancient dirt and bones

the skeletons inside
the vast mausoleum,
walk.
drawn to one tombstone

Comments

[okkoto]

like your other poem you should always make sure that the words and images you choose aren't so vague. stephen king said "writing is telepathy". don't just choose words or images because they work for you. the feelings are already inside you but your reader is a blank canvas. you have to paint on them.

to be perfectly honest i dont really get what's going on in this poem.