TM 230: Black and White

[cpo_galen_tyrol]

OOC: Contains spoilers for season four, up to but not including "Guess What's Coming To Dinner."

There's nothing white anymore. No lightness to anything.

Even looking at my son turns black. Because I know who he's crying for. He's not crying for daddy, not the guy who kissed him before going off in the morning and kissed him after coming home at

Comments

[number_eight]

I was lucky. How many Resurrection Ships have been around lately that would "save" me if I died again? None.

But I do know grief. I had it for an entire year while I thought Hera was dead. Don't do it alone. It'll kill you.

[cpo_galen_tyrol]

But Hera came back. You got her back. And even when you thought Hera was dead, it wasn't your fault. It's my fault Cally's dead.

How do I explain this to my son when he's old enough to understand? That his dad just kept taking and taking and taking from Mommy and never gave anything back? That I made promises and turned around and broke them?

How can I expect Nick to understand when I can barely even stand to live with myself?

[number_eight]

I got lucky. That's all.

I think you're making too much of this. For all you know, Cally couldn't handle the pressure of being on Galactica, or the pressure of being a mother.

It wasn't like she left you a suicide note.

You explain to him that you love him. That's all he needs to know.

[cpo_galen_tyrol]

Cally was stronger than you think she was. You think that just because she was small and not some larger than life pilot mother-frakker that she wasn't strong? She wanted to be a dentist. She didn't plan on spending her life in the military, in a situation like this. But she did it.

She wasn't like Starbuck, or Apollo, or even Boomer before everything went to hell. She joined the military to put herself through school.

Maybe she couldn't take the pressure, but it was the pressure that I piled on her. Before the Ionian Nebula, everything was fine. And now everything is fallen to pieces and I don't understand why.

The truth is, she was stronger than I am, and that scares the frak out of me. Because if she could fall, what chance do I have?

No, she just thought I was having an affair and beat the hell out of me for it and went off and committed suicide because I didn't bother letting her know how much she meant to me. Any which way you cut, I'm the one who was supposed to take care of her, the way she took care of me. I almost

[wants_to_resist]

[Locked to Tyrol]

She's my frakking wife. What else was I supposed to do?

[cpo_galen_tyrol]

[locked to Sam]

Just twist that knife a little more, buddy.

[wants_to_resist]

[Locked to Tyrol]

Whatever. You would have done the same, man.

[plan4victory]

I'm sorry, Galen.

[cpo_galen_tyrol]

Why?

It's not your fault. I should have frakking known she would've realized something was going on. I just never realized she was having such a hard time. How could she think I was having an affair?

I wonder what she would've done if she'd guessed the right secret.

OOC

[number_eight]

http://community.livejournal.com/ficrecfriday/6529.html

Re: OOC

[cpo_galen_tyrol]

OOC: I... wow. You have no idea how much that means to me. Thank you, so much!