(no subject)
Now that you've read the title of this LJ cut and still thought, hey, I'm gonna click this even though it will gross me out and induce me into scooping out my uterus with a large spoon, you can't say I didn't warn you.
Sick pervert.
Anyway, so my uterus decided to empty its contents in the space of 3 days. Normally it takes about 7 days for me, and when I bleed, I bleed - so you can imagine, 3 days is a lot of bleeding. Bleed. I don't think I've used that bleeding word enough.
For all you non-menstrual folk out there, uterus emptying doesn't simply involve the lining packing up its shit and dropping out. No, it kicks and screams and digs its teeth in and claws at the walls - of my uterus - who doesn't know how to deal with the situation other than contracting. A lot. And when one bleeds, one contracts. When one bleeds a lot, one contracts a lot. When one bleeds heavily and continually for 3 days, one contracts painfully and continually for 3 days.
And what a bloody, messy battle ensues. Getting up in the morning, rising from 2 hours of study, shifting from side to side on a seat, all simple gestures yet all result in that oddly familiar warm rush, followed by a frantic assumption of pant-wetting and a quick (but discreet) ass grab - then a mad dash to the toilet only to realise that the sheer force of thigh rubbing against a certain sanitary napkin enacted a motion similar to that of hands squeezing out a sponge and, oh shit, you've bled everywhere. Great.
The moral of the story is, you are a sick person for clicking that LJ cut.
I wrote that a few days ago and forgot about it. Good thing LJ has that nifty little "Restore from saved draft?" thing.
Can't shake this cough. It's been 3 weeks. GO. AWAY. FUCK.