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[crazytwigg]

I just asked mike if I could kiss his forehead.. He was laying down. It's something I used to do all the time. I couldn't stop the words from coming out. Oops.

I have coffee with his sister @ 1 today. Should be interesting . Wish me luck.

Posted via LiveJournal.app.

Comments

[poiyt]

What did he say? Did you do it? How have you kept calm and sane and functioning? I ask because I find myself in a similar situation now. Its honestly all I can do not to sit and cry all day, and it's impossible to be in the same room with her. Everything reminds me of how happy we once we were, of how much I love her. How have you managed thus far? What keeps you going?

[crazytwigg]

I don't know. LOL the kids make it so it's not ok to just fall apart. It's hard though. Here is where it's different then you're situation..we weren't really happy. We were content. Now..we're closer then we've ever been. where it goes from here is up to us. The coucnellor made a good point when she said that our old relationship is dead. What come now is an evolution into something on a higher level, or it fizzles out.

When Mike and I are in the same room together right now all I want to do is grab at him. Touch him. Hold him. hug him. But that's desperation telling me to panic. 'I can't lose him! hold on and don't let go' I'm trying super hard to just 'let go' and see what happens. So far so good.

I hope you're doing ok :( I haven't read for a few days so going to 'catch up'

Hugs

[crazytwigg]

He didn't say anything . Zach (our youngest) came in and he was saved from answering. I honestly don't know how I'm staying sane. What I can say is that our old relationship is gone , but what seems to be evolving is this new relationship. What happens with it is up to us, but I have never felt closer to anyone in my life. We are connecting where we haven't , saying things we've never said to each other...it's awesome. I have this overwheming feeling that things will be ok.. Whatever which ways it goes. I have to believe that... Otherwise this whole sane thing goes out the window.

He

[kandi_bomber]

wes and i both agree (not that we were talking about YOU) but i think the advce about no physicalness is BUNK.
seriously, just because that is their opinion, it doesnt mean its THE RIGHT one.

ask wes, who has seen more counsillors than most, and they all have diffrent ideas and some are outright retarded.

just sayin is all.

i love you, i just want you to be happy.

[crazytwigg]

Bunk indeed. I was so desperate for SOME sort of physical contact tonight that before Mike left to go downtown I asked for a hand shake. I was dead serious. I just wanted to feel him. He turned around and gave me the longest hug we've shared.

Beautiful.