a little confession of my sins...
I find English literature to be absolutely facinating as many English majors would, but lately I have found myself partaking in a new genre within the literary realm that really does frighten me a tad.
The subject matter that I am reading does not frighten me, as people have said to me that this particulary type of subject should have been my protege. I mean, everyone (and I mean everyone) has said that this subject matter is "right up my alley". And I have never been a prude before, but I find myself taking on prudish characteristics when I am in class. But what realy worries me is this...
I fear that I am desparately sinking into hell.
Please allow me to explain.
I am taking Early Victorian Literary Erotica.
It's my porn class.
The book I reading has made me desensitized to foul, crude language (such as the frequent use of the word "c**t" and "Co*kstand") and through reading a specific book, I have also come to be bored by written narrations of situations of rape and non-consensual intercourse.
Things that once shocked me have now dulled my senses, I am afraid.
Looking at the book, I realized that anyone who even knows of the book or has heard of the book (let alone read or touched the book) is going to hell. And I don't mean that in some patronizing, "woe is me" type way. This literature is the very essence why there are chronic rapists that take advantage of young women or how society has turned its back on its youth.
Sure, the book does give us insight to how a male in the Victorian Era may have acted and taken advantage of many servants and women alike, but to what degree is it ok to read this and have no emotional reaction to what is happening on the page?
Let me say here that anyone who voluntarily reads this book for pleasure and wanks themselves to orgasm in scenes of rape and/or child prostitution, please burn in hell.
This post is utterly a rant of the moralities of society sliding down the toilet.