Comments | crimson_musing: On another note

crimson_musing

On another note

Dec 09, 2010 10:16

It's OK. It's a more comfortable thought that I am so deeply flawed and crazy that this is not an abuse situation, and it's "marital problems" instead, and I'm just not taking responsibility for my part in it ( Read more... )

Comments 2

whitiger December 10 2010, 00:47:33 UTC

I believe you. I wish that I had more to offer you. I really admire you for taking a stand and working for your marriage, a better relationship, and a better person in Brad. I understand that most women stay in that type of situation or if they leave they usually return to the abusive situation. It is rare and commendable for a woman to stand up for herself, her children, and her husband. By that I don't mean condoning his behavior but standing up for the man he should and could be. If that makes any sense at all.

Let me know if there is anything that I can do to help you.

crimson_musing December 10 2010, 15:46:41 UTC

"...standing up for the man he should and could be."
THIS is what I'm trying to do.

I will NEVER fall into the trap of saying that Brad is INCAPABLE of making the right choices. Never. He has always had it in him to be GREAT, as we all do. I say it like it's simple. To me, it is simple. Live by a code. Live an examined life. Don't be afraid to criticize YOURSELF or your own actions. Have fear, but don't live by that fear. Make your motivation JOY.

I think it's simple, but I'm not claiming it's easy. Those are separate issues.

If those are the standards that are "too high" and "irrational" . . . then I don't want to BE rational or have "normal" standards.

Thank you, Stephonie.