Double Talking
Now the double talking I will tell you about is mostly for women since this is from a woman’s point of view. Double talking can be used for many things. There are the people who will use it in order to cause guilt, there are people who will use it to tell you something, and there are people who will use it in order to cause pain.
Bluff-
For some people you’ll never be able to stop them or get them to admit the bluff, but it’s best to let them know, that you know.
“Oh and then I went and did this!”
“...I thought you said you were doing this?”
“...No...No I didn’t...”
“Oh but I think you did.”
All the time you need to look them straight in the eye. Now you’re not saying “hey, your lying”, instead it may just seem like your casually disagreeing. And if they’re smart they’ll see what your saying. You can just drop the subject from there, continuing would no longer be “double talking” and could start a big conflict on something that may not be worth it.
Guilt-
If your not over something, but it seems like the other person is, double talking may come without even meaning for it to. (In this case it’s something that’s used more so when your on better terms with the ones who have wronged you)
Whatever a person has done to wrong you, you may be able to find casual and sometimes random ways to reference it. If something happened to you in response to the said wronging, you may bring that up a lot. Good example is if you lost weight and when said weight loss is brought up you try to point blame without really pointing it.
Or if you end up in a situation that’s similar to the one you were in. A situation that puts you in the driver’s seat, able to hurt someone as you were hurt. Telling the people who have wronged you, perhaps they’ll give you a push in the more hurtful direction, to which you respond “but I’m their friend, I’d never do that.” (Kinda speaks for itself)
My favorite is when the person who has wronged you has been in the same type of situation themselves, when they’re the victim. They may whine to you about how badly they’ve been wronged, and this happened and that happened.
You’re response?
Try to sympathize as much as possible, all the time looking them straight in the eye. Think “yea, YOU’RE the reason I know”, and it may surprise you how much your eyes may tell them that. If you see a difference in the story that may be able to help you; “Well it’s better than _____”
This is usually used until you feel justified in the situation. But be careful when it comes to some people, they may get what your saying more than you think, and Lady Karma may have gotten to them before you have. It’s a tough situation so just stop when it feels right to...Unless the person crazy sucks....then fuck that! (This usually refers to the people who whine to you about their wrongs)
Hurt- (just all the rest that I can’t really categorize)
Once in a while you will come in contact with people who like pain. Those immature girls who either are in or just forever trapped in High School. The crappiest part about them is when you have a common friend. There’s a good chance they’ll try to somehow make you feel self-conscious about said friend, or try to prove they know more. Anything to make you feel crappy.
This works well for you if you really do know said friend better. Than you just prove it, good chance they won’t really know where to go with it. It’s what you always have to do with such double talkers like this, remain calm.
Saying things like “yea, I know”, will probably surprise them. It’s probably their assumption that they’re telling you something you don’t already know that’ll stun you. Hopefully you really do know, then it’s even better. Putting things that they think you don’t know, or they think you do know to rest works quite well.
They try to reference a situation that they think might get your blood to boil. Who knows, maybe it might. Maybe it is something you’re just hearing. Will they know that? Hell no! No matter WHAT it involves! Play hand in hand with them. They try to downgrade your relationship with the person? You downgrade theirs! Once again, it’s always the best when you know for a fact you hold importance and the other person just SUCKS!
A good example is if, say your friend has hooked up with a person who is friends with the face of all evil (whose very good at double talking). Whatever the reason may be, the face of all evil may think this is something that bothers you. Perhaps it does, but remain calm!
“Oh ____ wants ___ in the pants.”
“Yea, I know”
“Oh...he told you?” <-surprised at response
“Somewhat, he doesn’t really tell me much, especially when he’s angry” <-closes any chance at trying to lie and say his feelings are mutual
“Oh...well ____ is one of those who (blah blah blah, one of those who takes it too seriously pretty much), hooking up and then a good cuddle, and she’s in love.” <-she’s going to put emphasis on the cuddling part because the idea in the head could poor salt on an open wound. She may still be hoping you don’t know about the hook-up part. But whether you do or if you don’t, even if you only know part of the story.
“He doesn’t take those things too seriously.”
Can they respond? I know in this hypothetical world the face of all evil couldn’t. Remain calm and remember that you probably know this person ten times better than they do. Don’t let the situation get to you (unless it really is catastrophic to your life, which I doubt). And try not to keep around people like that...You crazy don’t need it.
And you’d be surprised how easily one can downgrade a relationship. Don’t start the crappy situation, just be the retort. Trust me...It’ll come.
The only other thing I can think of is when someone wants to tell you something they know you don’t want to know, yet feel they need to anyway. They’ll probably just sneak it into a conversation, maybe by starting a conversation you’ve technically already had with the person.
Same rule applys.
And you’d be surprised with this...Trust me, I had one full day when all these things applied. Why I could give a whole bunch more examples but I’d rather not private this.