--Like a roller coaster ride, holding on white knuckes like whoa, whoa--
Title: The Fear of Not Understanding
Author/Artist: crimsondream13
Fandom: Axis Powers Hetalia
Character(s) or Pairing(s): Russia, China
Rating: G
Warnings: None?
Summary: All Ivan ever wanted with someone was friendship; why couldn’t anyone grant him that? Maybe dinner with a certain Chinese man could help him understand...
“Why doesn’t anyone like me, Yao?”
Wang Yao tensed at that, becoming silent as he gently placed the plate of fried rice at the center of his dining table. “I...” he gulped as he took on a nervous smile, “What made you think that, Ivan, aru?”
The Russian didn’t smile back. That notion made Yao more anxious as he pushed the recently filled plate in front of Ivan Braginsky, his (unexpected) guest for the night. “It’s no use playing around, Yao. Even you,” Ivan smiled sadly at that, “don’t like me, do you? You’re just pretending. Like everyone else is. I just want to know why. Why doesn’t anyone like me? I try to be friendly, I offer so many nice things to everyone- yet they don’t like me. They never did. Even my own sister didn’t want to stay with me. Why, Yao?”
“It’s because we all fear what we cannot understand.” The brunet murmured as he looked down into his plate of food, suddenly losing his appetite as he remembered how much truth that statement held for him. So many wars happened in the past because of that fear of not understanding things, not only to him but to other country personifications as well.
But it’s different now. Wars were happening merely because of the lack of trust, lack of friendship, lack of unity- just because no one ever wanted to understand what their neighbors may feel if they did one thing. No one cared about their fellows anymore. It was all just pain and selfishness with nothing more to get them back on the right track. Even the youth were not much to hope for, Yao thought, what with the different stereotypes the world was enforcing on them, thus making them incapable to make the right choices just because of the pressure of the society.
“We...are still humans. We can still feel fear, hurt and anger. It has already been imprinted into our natures to be such...” The Chinese man bit his lip as he hid his trembling hands in his long sleeves, “Such animals. We always look for the answers to everything, never thinking that what we are looking for is something that must be left unknown. Our curiosity is insatiable- therefore, when we don’t understand something and we cannot find the answer to that thing which we don’t understand...we destroy it. We fail to think that this world is not ours, nor are our lives. We forget that we’re only humans, instead thinking that we are the gods of this world, thinking that only those objects which we understand may exist.”
Ivan nodded at that, a thoughtful -and more cheerful, thankfully- look on his face as he spoke, “That’s true, isn’t it. No one ever really tried to understand me, why I acted this way...but it’s only fair, right? Because I never try to understand everyone else. I can understand why they don’t- I mean, it must be really hard, da?” The blonde smiled softly at that, a hint of sadness in his eyes as he added, “But it really wouldn’t hurt to try, would it? Everyone...everyone must want a friend- just one friend that they can confide in when, as they say, ‘the times are rough’, don’t they?”
Yao nodded at that, feeling his heart warm a bit for the taller man. Even if there were times that he regretted even letting the Russian into his life, he just couldn’t help his self from thinking that maybe Ivan truly was just misunderstood- that his screwed up mentality was nothing more than a rumor.
But then came the times that that rumor would be proven correct through the Russian’s moments of weakness. The moments when Ivan Braginsky’s temper failed him, when his childish mindset would overrule his logical thinking and when his unnatural pleasure in seeing the pain of others would surface.
It was only likely that he be startled when a gloved hand covered his own shaking one, him being so deep into his thoughts that he didn’t at all notice Ivan reaching for him.
“If...if it’s alright with you...can you help me try to work this out? I’m really not sure what to do, and, well, you’re not all that experienced too- but maybe we could learn together?” There was a hopeful smile on the Russian’s face as he spoke, gloved hands taking Yao’s own into his as he murmured wistfully, “It would be nice to have a friend, don’t you agree, Yao?”
There was only a minute of hesitation before the brunet gripped Ivan’s hand back in comfort, a small smile on his face as he spoke-
“It wouldn’t hurt to try, after all.”
Alas, that saying could only dare to prove the pair wrong when even less than half of a decade passed.
==============================
A/N: WOOOOOO, WRITER’S BLOCK DIED AND JUMPED INTO THE 300-ESQUE HOLE-THING. *CHEERS* (\
/)
IDEK if it’s meant to be Russia/China but whatevs, you guys can think what you want. It’s reaaaallly short but meh, at least my brain managed to spit something out. Hope you guys...enjoyed? idek.
Author/Artist: crimsondream13
Fandom: Axis Powers Hetalia
Character(s) or Pairing(s): Russia, China
Rating: G
Warnings: None?
Summary: All Ivan ever wanted with someone was friendship; why couldn’t anyone grant him that? Maybe dinner with a certain Chinese man could help him understand...
“Why doesn’t anyone like me, Yao?”
Wang Yao tensed at that, becoming silent as he gently placed the plate of fried rice at the center of his dining table. “I...” he gulped as he took on a nervous smile, “What made you think that, Ivan, aru?”
The Russian didn’t smile back. That notion made Yao more anxious as he pushed the recently filled plate in front of Ivan Braginsky, his (unexpected) guest for the night. “It’s no use playing around, Yao. Even you,” Ivan smiled sadly at that, “don’t like me, do you? You’re just pretending. Like everyone else is. I just want to know why. Why doesn’t anyone like me? I try to be friendly, I offer so many nice things to everyone- yet they don’t like me. They never did. Even my own sister didn’t want to stay with me. Why, Yao?”
“It’s because we all fear what we cannot understand.” The brunet murmured as he looked down into his plate of food, suddenly losing his appetite as he remembered how much truth that statement held for him. So many wars happened in the past because of that fear of not understanding things, not only to him but to other country personifications as well.
But it’s different now. Wars were happening merely because of the lack of trust, lack of friendship, lack of unity- just because no one ever wanted to understand what their neighbors may feel if they did one thing. No one cared about their fellows anymore. It was all just pain and selfishness with nothing more to get them back on the right track. Even the youth were not much to hope for, Yao thought, what with the different stereotypes the world was enforcing on them, thus making them incapable to make the right choices just because of the pressure of the society.
“We...are still humans. We can still feel fear, hurt and anger. It has already been imprinted into our natures to be such...” The Chinese man bit his lip as he hid his trembling hands in his long sleeves, “Such animals. We always look for the answers to everything, never thinking that what we are looking for is something that must be left unknown. Our curiosity is insatiable- therefore, when we don’t understand something and we cannot find the answer to that thing which we don’t understand...we destroy it. We fail to think that this world is not ours, nor are our lives. We forget that we’re only humans, instead thinking that we are the gods of this world, thinking that only those objects which we understand may exist.”
Ivan nodded at that, a thoughtful -and more cheerful, thankfully- look on his face as he spoke, “That’s true, isn’t it. No one ever really tried to understand me, why I acted this way...but it’s only fair, right? Because I never try to understand everyone else. I can understand why they don’t- I mean, it must be really hard, da?” The blonde smiled softly at that, a hint of sadness in his eyes as he added, “But it really wouldn’t hurt to try, would it? Everyone...everyone must want a friend- just one friend that they can confide in when, as they say, ‘the times are rough’, don’t they?”
Yao nodded at that, feeling his heart warm a bit for the taller man. Even if there were times that he regretted even letting the Russian into his life, he just couldn’t help his self from thinking that maybe Ivan truly was just misunderstood- that his screwed up mentality was nothing more than a rumor.
But then came the times that that rumor would be proven correct through the Russian’s moments of weakness. The moments when Ivan Braginsky’s temper failed him, when his childish mindset would overrule his logical thinking and when his unnatural pleasure in seeing the pain of others would surface.
It was only likely that he be startled when a gloved hand covered his own shaking one, him being so deep into his thoughts that he didn’t at all notice Ivan reaching for him.
“If...if it’s alright with you...can you help me try to work this out? I’m really not sure what to do, and, well, you’re not all that experienced too- but maybe we could learn together?” There was a hopeful smile on the Russian’s face as he spoke, gloved hands taking Yao’s own into his as he murmured wistfully, “It would be nice to have a friend, don’t you agree, Yao?”
There was only a minute of hesitation before the brunet gripped Ivan’s hand back in comfort, a small smile on his face as he spoke-
“It wouldn’t hurt to try, after all.”
Alas, that saying could only dare to prove the pair wrong when even less than half of a decade passed.
==============================
A/N: WOOOOOO, WRITER’S BLOCK DIED AND JUMPED INTO THE 300-ESQUE HOLE-THING. *CHEERS* (\
/)
IDEK if it’s meant to be Russia/China but whatevs, you guys can think what you want. It’s reaaaallly short but meh, at least my brain managed to spit something out. Hope you guys...enjoyed? idek.