Comments | crip_crit: 14 nights

kstipetic in crip_crit

14 nights

Feb 11, 2011 19:23

Thanks everyone who responded to my previous post! Here is the website:

14 NightsIt says it "contains nudity and sex" but so far, there are just one or two images of a guy sitting around without clothes on, as well as some curse words here and there ( Read more... )

Comments 14

reposting, didn't go through the first time moontoad February 11 2011, 14:17:46 UTC

It seems that the guy is asking for ketamine to avoid life for a couple weeks, right? The doctor's response isn't quite what I'd expect, and I don't think the average person is going to be clued into why he asked for ketamine. It seemed as if the doctor was responding to his request as if he were asking for painkillers. While ketamine is used for pain, it's much more often used as a general anesthetic (and I'm starting the process of getting a ketamine coma myself). So if you meant him to be asking for a painkiller, ketamine isn't a good choice, the only way it's prescribed from a pharmacist is very rarely in the topical form. If he's looking to avoid life for a couple weeks, then his doctor's response doesn't quite match up with that. Also, it seemed to refer to ketamine as if they come in pill form. "I only need them for a couple weeks". It's sold in liquid or powder form, meant to have water added to make a solution. I noticed some English mistakes, so if that's how the character is, then it is fine but if that wasn't ( ... )

Re: reposting, didn't go through the first time kstipetic February 12 2011, 02:07:21 UTC

Yeah, it's pretty obvious I don't know what I'm talking about as far as ketamine goes. I was just guessing...And I think you're right about it not having anything to do with the rest of the story. I figured I needed some way to introduce the audience to his disability without making it seem mysterious or like a plot point, but it seems like it backfired. It's only two pages, though, so it wouldn't be too hard to re-write.

The doctor's notes, argh! There was supposed to be a decimal there, so 2.5 years. But you can't see it at all! That is easily fixable, though.

And a question is for everyone: Are visually impaired people interested in reading cartoons? I could make the site more accessible if there was any interest.

Re: reposting, didn't go through the first time moontoad February 12 2011, 02:12:26 UTC

That's a wee bit discriminatory, don't you think? Deaf people can be interested in music even though they might not be able to hear it. Why wouldn't someone who has a visual impairment of some sort not enjoy a graphic novel if properly described?

That said, I have tons of blind and visually impaired friends who love comics and graphic novels. The problem is that most people don't make an effort to make them accessible, so my friends don't actively search them out online. They tend to wait until someone finds one that is interesting, and they relay the scene for them.

Re: reposting, didn't go through the first time kstipetic February 13 2011, 01:46:22 UTC

I guess I never thought about it before. But I could do transcripts pretty easily, I think, and just link each one to the foot of each page and have those link to each other. Any suggestions on how to make them more convenient?

Thread 8

lovefromgirl February 11 2011, 15:30:30 UTC

Weird question, but--are you Russian, by any chance? Page 2 contains an insult I've heard in Russian more often than any other language. (I only know it because my dad was researching a novel... about soldiers. With soldier language. *blush*)

moontoad February 11 2011, 17:58:44 UTC

Yeah, I assumed Russian too. The main character's name is Russian as well.

kstipetic February 12 2011, 01:45:07 UTC

Yeah, the main character is Russian, but I'm not. I'm glad you were able to pick up on his Russian-ness, because that's another thing I'm sort of writing from the outside. To answer Moontoad's previous question, that's also why he makes some grammar mistakes.

Russian sure is full of colorful curses, it's true Oo

moontoad February 12 2011, 01:47:08 UTC

I either only noticed the grammar mistakes at the start, and it blended, or you didn't make enough grammar mistakes throughout. His ethnicity seems even more incidental than his disability.

dwgism February 11 2011, 18:29:00 UTC

I think the danger you face is people looking at that opening couple of scenes and assuming it's just another disabled person angry with his disability. Starting with a medicalised setting foregrounds the disability and makes a medicalised interpretation of the story almost inevitable.

It's also not clear why he wants Ketamine, which if anyone knows drugs is a startlingly one to simply state you want. Again it suggests that a medicalised interpretation of the story is the intended one.

kstipetic February 12 2011, 02:09:16 UTC

Yeah, you're right. In light of these comments, I think I will re-work the opening.