Fic: Brothers on a Roof Rated G
Title: Brothers on a Roof
Author: Sara
Rated: G, this is totally safe, sorry
Warning: None, well unless you factor in the consequences of forgetting Valentines Day
Characters: Tim and Dick, Dick and Tim, well there is also a cameo for Alfred
Summary: Dick and Tim talk on a roof
==================
“Are you sure you want to do that?”
“Yep. I wouldn’t be up here if I wasn’t. I’ve taken all I can take and given all I can give and there is nothing more. I’m dried and hollowed out. I thought I could hold on until Bruce came back but I was wrong. A person can’t go that long without love.”
“I never said I didn’t love you. I got mad and I got pissed”
“You think you have a pass on getting mad or pissed? I’m mad and pissed to, but I don’t have the liberty anymore of taking it out on everyone else. Let me ask, I got to know. Did you plan on this all along? Was this the last part of a master plan?”
“What?”
“You tracked me down, stalking me. You told me all about how Bruce needed me. You decide YOU want to be Robin. It looked fun and exciting. You then decide you had to have my father too. You suddenly now claim to be the only one Bruce loves. You took everything I had. You even decide to strut around with the last name. You find out he is alive, you decide I don’t need to know. I had doubts so I am not as WORTHY as you.”
“I didn’t mean it like that. Bruce didn’t even leave me a decent message.”
“No, ah THAT was Jason. He got called a disappointment and a failure.”
“Ouch.”
“Exactly. That is why I didn’t want to kill him. I got that message from Bruce, I think I would go psycho too.”
“I didn’t know.”
“I know. Tim, I didn’t have any choice. When you took off Robin and put on Batman and went to kill our brother, I didn’t see that as wanting to keep being Robin. I thought YOU quit. If I misunderstood I apologize. I’m not a mind reader. I had to base it solely on the actions that I saw.”
“I suppose I didn’t make it any easier.”
“No. No you didn’t. I still loved you and it hurt to have you just throw me aside. I also thought it was going to be so strange for Batman to have a Robin who’s only 6 years younger. I seriously thought you had earned your OWN name. Your own identity. THAT is what I was trying to tell you before you stormed off. You’re a man now, not an apprentice. Though, I guess I got to admit, I really had hoped you would have displayed a better fashion sense. That cowl looks like you are wearing a beak on your head, a big ugly honking black beak.”
“You came up with a disco outfit and you are questioning MY fashion sense?”
“Hey, Disco was HOT then. The whole thing was spandex and chest hair.”
“You never HAD chest hair.”
“That’s not the point. The ladies thought the costume was VERY hot.”
“Dick, you have the hottest butt in the world. You could wear a frigging sumo belt and still look hot to the ladies.”
“I tried a sumo belt. DO NOT look at me like that. It was Roy’s idea and well when you are A LOT older and I can be reasonably sure you will not go into convulsions of hysterical laughter, I will tell you about it.”
“Ok, seriously, I get the beak, it does look a little funky. But seriously, what else?”
“I love the longer hair. It makes you look older and edgy. Don’t get a hair cut. This family has a fetish about hair. But Tim, JASON came back wearing THAT with THAT name. He came back with HARLEY on his arm. You’re smart and have better taste.”
“Thank you. Ewww the thought of having Harley on my arm is totally disgusting.”
“Exactly. We seriously have to get you a better name.”
“Like what? Nightwing?”
“Nope, that’s MINE. Ok, evidently there is also some flakey kryptonian running around with it too but well it’s MINE. Hmm…..Whizkid.”
“Whizkid? Where the HELL did you come up with that name? It sounds like I am suffering from a bladder control problem. I am also NOT A KID.”
“I know. Just glad that YOU finally see that. Hmmm Wunderkind.”
“OK, have you been smoking something or drinking? First of all, that is lame, even for Wendy and Marvin. It makes me think I should go and find Wonderdog.”
“Wonderdog was a good dude.”
“He turned into a hound from HELL.”
“Not his fault he got swept up by Trigon. He should have been given another shot.”
“Dick, he killed Marvin! Ok, one could chalk that one up to a mercy killing.”
“No, a mercy killing was the day that Danny Chase bit it.”
“Why do you always get that maniacally happy grin when you bring it up? You sound almost gleeful. It’s a little sick.”
“I guess you just had to meet Mr. Chase.”
“well, there is always the Lazarus pit.”
“Don’t you DARE! Do not even THINK about it. Besides, Chase would make the pit explode or something and then we’ll have to deal with all of what is in them. Gross.”
“Ok, but I reserve the right to taunt and tease you about it. HMMM BlackBat.”
“Blackbat? Black BAT. Hmmm okay, I like that. That is a cool name. I like it. We let Alfred design the costume.”
“Why Alfred? What was the last modern clothes trend he adhered to? I think Queen Victoria was still alive.”
“True, BUT if he designs it, neither he or Dad will burn it when we’re not looking.”
“You do have a good point there. Why do you still have a cape? You HATE capes.”
“I do but Alfred and Bruce don’t. When you carry on a legacy, you are kind of roped into their fashion decisions.”
“I’m sorry Dick.”
“I know, let’s just not bring it up again. You know, between you and me, it is a real freaky moment to watch what looks like your father explode.”
“I could have told you it wasn’t him. But, well, we were being brats at the time.”
“True, BUT it got Jason to shut up, I got to see what they do without breaking my promise to never put a person in the pits since well a clone doesn’t count, and I do have a neat story to tell Roy.”
“I think he would find Bruce exploding very satisfying at some level.”
“Roy has an interesting sense of humor, and he is also scared of Dad deep down.”
“Roy is a very smart “
“He has his moments. I like keeping him around, even if he does irritate me.”
“I suppose it’s only fair. You have Roy and now I have Damian.”
“Tim, you have no idea how wrong that sentence was.”
“Please, can I toss him off a building?”
“Roy or Damian? Roy, no because he could seriously kick your butt. Damian…yes, as long as it’s a small building, three stories at the most.”
“That can work for me. Seriously, I think Dad is alive but back in time.”
“OUR father going through HISTORY?”
“Ah, yeah… scary huh?”
“The thought of the damage our father could do trying to ‘fix’ history. Why do I fear for NASA and the whole space program?”
“Just NASA? I’m afraid for history books around the world at the moment.”
“I think we might need help on this one.”
“He needs YOU on this one.”
“ME?”
“Duh. You are the only one he ALWAYS listens too.”
‘Tim, he doesn’t ALWAYS listen to me.”
“Yes he does, he just likes to pretend he doesn’t. If you notice, he will end up doing most of what you suggest; he just pronounces it as if he were the one who decided it.”
“Tim, I am a child of modern times. I don’t know how I am going to do that.”
“All you have to do is well guide him and do damage control. I’ll BUY you history books.”
“That means I have to READ history books. Can’t you just get me Cliff Notes or DVDs?”
“You are just being lazy.”
“I know, is it working? Oh crap. We have to go get our brother out of trouble.”
“Which one?”
“Both. Damian is taking on Jason over on the El.”
“Great. Heads, you get the small idiot, tails you get the big idiot.”
“If you take EITHER, can I get a promise that they will be both ALIVE, you do? I really do not want to be doing another funeral.”
“Anyone tell you lately that you are getting a decidedly morbid and brooding personality.”
“I think it comes with the territory.”
“Very true. Very very true.”
“Tell Oracle we’re on our way.”
“She’s YOUR girlfriend. Why shouldn’t you talk to her?”
“I kinda sorta forgot Valentine’s Day. I pulled a Bruce.”
“She is going to kill you.”
“Bat’s don’t kill.”
“I think women whose men have forgotten Valentine’s Day have an exemption. Uh oh. I kinda sorta forgot with Stephanie.”
“Batgirls always have bad tempers.”
“How long does it take to get on their good side again?”
“Good question. I wonder if this is why Bruce never has the same girlfriend twice.”
“ALFRED”
“ALFRED”
“Young gentlemen, I will bail you out, but just this ONE time. I have marked the day with a heart in red. I know your father has a faulty memory but that is one legacy that does NOT need to be passed on. Have I made myself clear?”
“Yes Sir.”
“Yes Alf.”
“Now, please go and pull in your miscreant brothers.”
Author: Sara
Rated: G, this is totally safe, sorry
Warning: None, well unless you factor in the consequences of forgetting Valentines Day
Characters: Tim and Dick, Dick and Tim, well there is also a cameo for Alfred
Summary: Dick and Tim talk on a roof
==================
“Are you sure you want to do that?”
“Yep. I wouldn’t be up here if I wasn’t. I’ve taken all I can take and given all I can give and there is nothing more. I’m dried and hollowed out. I thought I could hold on until Bruce came back but I was wrong. A person can’t go that long without love.”
“I never said I didn’t love you. I got mad and I got pissed”
“You think you have a pass on getting mad or pissed? I’m mad and pissed to, but I don’t have the liberty anymore of taking it out on everyone else. Let me ask, I got to know. Did you plan on this all along? Was this the last part of a master plan?”
“What?”
“You tracked me down, stalking me. You told me all about how Bruce needed me. You decide YOU want to be Robin. It looked fun and exciting. You then decide you had to have my father too. You suddenly now claim to be the only one Bruce loves. You took everything I had. You even decide to strut around with the last name. You find out he is alive, you decide I don’t need to know. I had doubts so I am not as WORTHY as you.”
“I didn’t mean it like that. Bruce didn’t even leave me a decent message.”
“No, ah THAT was Jason. He got called a disappointment and a failure.”
“Ouch.”
“Exactly. That is why I didn’t want to kill him. I got that message from Bruce, I think I would go psycho too.”
“I didn’t know.”
“I know. Tim, I didn’t have any choice. When you took off Robin and put on Batman and went to kill our brother, I didn’t see that as wanting to keep being Robin. I thought YOU quit. If I misunderstood I apologize. I’m not a mind reader. I had to base it solely on the actions that I saw.”
“I suppose I didn’t make it any easier.”
“No. No you didn’t. I still loved you and it hurt to have you just throw me aside. I also thought it was going to be so strange for Batman to have a Robin who’s only 6 years younger. I seriously thought you had earned your OWN name. Your own identity. THAT is what I was trying to tell you before you stormed off. You’re a man now, not an apprentice. Though, I guess I got to admit, I really had hoped you would have displayed a better fashion sense. That cowl looks like you are wearing a beak on your head, a big ugly honking black beak.”
“You came up with a disco outfit and you are questioning MY fashion sense?”
“Hey, Disco was HOT then. The whole thing was spandex and chest hair.”
“You never HAD chest hair.”
“That’s not the point. The ladies thought the costume was VERY hot.”
“Dick, you have the hottest butt in the world. You could wear a frigging sumo belt and still look hot to the ladies.”
“I tried a sumo belt. DO NOT look at me like that. It was Roy’s idea and well when you are A LOT older and I can be reasonably sure you will not go into convulsions of hysterical laughter, I will tell you about it.”
“Ok, seriously, I get the beak, it does look a little funky. But seriously, what else?”
“I love the longer hair. It makes you look older and edgy. Don’t get a hair cut. This family has a fetish about hair. But Tim, JASON came back wearing THAT with THAT name. He came back with HARLEY on his arm. You’re smart and have better taste.”
“Thank you. Ewww the thought of having Harley on my arm is totally disgusting.”
“Exactly. We seriously have to get you a better name.”
“Like what? Nightwing?”
“Nope, that’s MINE. Ok, evidently there is also some flakey kryptonian running around with it too but well it’s MINE. Hmm…..Whizkid.”
“Whizkid? Where the HELL did you come up with that name? It sounds like I am suffering from a bladder control problem. I am also NOT A KID.”
“I know. Just glad that YOU finally see that. Hmmm Wunderkind.”
“OK, have you been smoking something or drinking? First of all, that is lame, even for Wendy and Marvin. It makes me think I should go and find Wonderdog.”
“Wonderdog was a good dude.”
“He turned into a hound from HELL.”
“Not his fault he got swept up by Trigon. He should have been given another shot.”
“Dick, he killed Marvin! Ok, one could chalk that one up to a mercy killing.”
“No, a mercy killing was the day that Danny Chase bit it.”
“Why do you always get that maniacally happy grin when you bring it up? You sound almost gleeful. It’s a little sick.”
“I guess you just had to meet Mr. Chase.”
“well, there is always the Lazarus pit.”
“Don’t you DARE! Do not even THINK about it. Besides, Chase would make the pit explode or something and then we’ll have to deal with all of what is in them. Gross.”
“Ok, but I reserve the right to taunt and tease you about it. HMMM BlackBat.”
“Blackbat? Black BAT. Hmmm okay, I like that. That is a cool name. I like it. We let Alfred design the costume.”
“Why Alfred? What was the last modern clothes trend he adhered to? I think Queen Victoria was still alive.”
“True, BUT if he designs it, neither he or Dad will burn it when we’re not looking.”
“You do have a good point there. Why do you still have a cape? You HATE capes.”
“I do but Alfred and Bruce don’t. When you carry on a legacy, you are kind of roped into their fashion decisions.”
“I’m sorry Dick.”
“I know, let’s just not bring it up again. You know, between you and me, it is a real freaky moment to watch what looks like your father explode.”
“I could have told you it wasn’t him. But, well, we were being brats at the time.”
“True, BUT it got Jason to shut up, I got to see what they do without breaking my promise to never put a person in the pits since well a clone doesn’t count, and I do have a neat story to tell Roy.”
“I think he would find Bruce exploding very satisfying at some level.”
“Roy has an interesting sense of humor, and he is also scared of Dad deep down.”
“Roy is a very smart “
“He has his moments. I like keeping him around, even if he does irritate me.”
“I suppose it’s only fair. You have Roy and now I have Damian.”
“Tim, you have no idea how wrong that sentence was.”
“Please, can I toss him off a building?”
“Roy or Damian? Roy, no because he could seriously kick your butt. Damian…yes, as long as it’s a small building, three stories at the most.”
“That can work for me. Seriously, I think Dad is alive but back in time.”
“OUR father going through HISTORY?”
“Ah, yeah… scary huh?”
“The thought of the damage our father could do trying to ‘fix’ history. Why do I fear for NASA and the whole space program?”
“Just NASA? I’m afraid for history books around the world at the moment.”
“I think we might need help on this one.”
“He needs YOU on this one.”
“ME?”
“Duh. You are the only one he ALWAYS listens too.”
‘Tim, he doesn’t ALWAYS listen to me.”
“Yes he does, he just likes to pretend he doesn’t. If you notice, he will end up doing most of what you suggest; he just pronounces it as if he were the one who decided it.”
“Tim, I am a child of modern times. I don’t know how I am going to do that.”
“All you have to do is well guide him and do damage control. I’ll BUY you history books.”
“That means I have to READ history books. Can’t you just get me Cliff Notes or DVDs?”
“You are just being lazy.”
“I know, is it working? Oh crap. We have to go get our brother out of trouble.”
“Which one?”
“Both. Damian is taking on Jason over on the El.”
“Great. Heads, you get the small idiot, tails you get the big idiot.”
“If you take EITHER, can I get a promise that they will be both ALIVE, you do? I really do not want to be doing another funeral.”
“Anyone tell you lately that you are getting a decidedly morbid and brooding personality.”
“I think it comes with the territory.”
“Very true. Very very true.”
“Tell Oracle we’re on our way.”
“She’s YOUR girlfriend. Why shouldn’t you talk to her?”
“I kinda sorta forgot Valentine’s Day. I pulled a Bruce.”
“She is going to kill you.”
“Bat’s don’t kill.”
“I think women whose men have forgotten Valentine’s Day have an exemption. Uh oh. I kinda sorta forgot with Stephanie.”
“Batgirls always have bad tempers.”
“How long does it take to get on their good side again?”
“Good question. I wonder if this is why Bruce never has the same girlfriend twice.”
“ALFRED”
“ALFRED”
“Young gentlemen, I will bail you out, but just this ONE time. I have marked the day with a heart in red. I know your father has a faulty memory but that is one legacy that does NOT need to be passed on. Have I made myself clear?”
“Yes Sir.”
“Yes Alf.”
“Now, please go and pull in your miscreant brothers.”