[freewrite] Goodbye
First freewrite I post here.
You can read and comment or just read, whatever you want.
Actually I will always write 'him, he' and so on, because I like male persons better. It could always be a woman or girl, too.
Freewrites are mostly personal. This one is personal.
You may ask questions and maybe I will answer them, whatever~
~
He asked you “How is it to be broken? How does it feel?” and you just smiled. How could you ever possible explain it to someone, someone else who doesn’t feel it?!
He doesn’t really wants to know, he just wants to talk with you, exchanging the little details of your lives with each other until he can get the feeling you know each other again.
He just wants to pretend everything is still okay and you are still okay. He doesn’t want to know how it feels, because then he wouldn’t ask, he would just do the same as you.
But the fact is, he can’t do the same, he can’t and you know it and it doesn’t hurt you as much as it has been before.
You know now that you are the one who has to suffer when it comes to you and him.
With still a smile you shake your head and show him that you won’t play that game anymore.
“Wait! Where are you going? I thought we could talk. You know, like before!”
His words don’t really reach your mind and you don’t stop, let him following you like a little dog attached to your shoes.
The silence that settles between you is deafening and you just smile, broken, broken, broken. With every footstep the word lingers between you and him, raises dust with every step you do and when you suddenly stop he almost falls on you.
“Leave me alone. You don’t deserve me. Do you want to feel what it is to be broken? Then don’t ask but just experience it yourself. If you are strong enough, then do it yourself. But don’t bother me anymore.”
You pause and he waits, you both wait until you continue with a smaller and lighter voice.
“I lived on, with my own life. I picked up the pieces you left behind knowing exactly well what you did. I lived on and now I live without you. I want to live this life and not the one I had before. So leave me alone and find someone else you can ask stupid questions.”
You hear him wanting to answer again, listen to his breathing changing for a second, before he turns around. His feet shuffle on the ground and you listen to him walking down the street he followed you to your house.
When you open the door a soft voice calls for you and you have to smile, a true smile this time.
“Where have you been?”
His voice makes your soul flutter and you almost run into his arms, press against his familiar chest and the little noises he always makes when he embraces you.
“I said goodbye to someone.”
“Ah, are you sad because of that?”
You laugh, only a little and he looks at you, surprised.
“No, that’s not it. I was just reminded of some things a long while ago. Do you mind holding me a bit longer?”
Your voice is small and warm and the answer comes shortly after with a kiss on your forehead.
“As long as you wish, darling, forever.”
You can read and comment or just read, whatever you want.
Actually I will always write 'him, he' and so on, because I like male persons better. It could always be a woman or girl, too.
Freewrites are mostly personal. This one is personal.
You may ask questions and maybe I will answer them, whatever~
~
He asked you “How is it to be broken? How does it feel?” and you just smiled. How could you ever possible explain it to someone, someone else who doesn’t feel it?!
He doesn’t really wants to know, he just wants to talk with you, exchanging the little details of your lives with each other until he can get the feeling you know each other again.
He just wants to pretend everything is still okay and you are still okay. He doesn’t want to know how it feels, because then he wouldn’t ask, he would just do the same as you.
But the fact is, he can’t do the same, he can’t and you know it and it doesn’t hurt you as much as it has been before.
You know now that you are the one who has to suffer when it comes to you and him.
With still a smile you shake your head and show him that you won’t play that game anymore.
“Wait! Where are you going? I thought we could talk. You know, like before!”
His words don’t really reach your mind and you don’t stop, let him following you like a little dog attached to your shoes.
The silence that settles between you is deafening and you just smile, broken, broken, broken. With every footstep the word lingers between you and him, raises dust with every step you do and when you suddenly stop he almost falls on you.
“Leave me alone. You don’t deserve me. Do you want to feel what it is to be broken? Then don’t ask but just experience it yourself. If you are strong enough, then do it yourself. But don’t bother me anymore.”
You pause and he waits, you both wait until you continue with a smaller and lighter voice.
“I lived on, with my own life. I picked up the pieces you left behind knowing exactly well what you did. I lived on and now I live without you. I want to live this life and not the one I had before. So leave me alone and find someone else you can ask stupid questions.”
You hear him wanting to answer again, listen to his breathing changing for a second, before he turns around. His feet shuffle on the ground and you listen to him walking down the street he followed you to your house.
When you open the door a soft voice calls for you and you have to smile, a true smile this time.
“Where have you been?”
His voice makes your soul flutter and you almost run into his arms, press against his familiar chest and the little noises he always makes when he embraces you.
“I said goodbye to someone.”
“Ah, are you sad because of that?”
You laugh, only a little and he looks at you, surprised.
“No, that’s not it. I was just reminded of some things a long while ago. Do you mind holding me a bit longer?”
Your voice is small and warm and the answer comes shortly after with a kiss on your forehead.
“As long as you wish, darling, forever.”