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its eric adventures, done by eric, the captions you see were written by eric, im just copying and pasting them in
The Cannon
During a recent trip to Scotland, my friend Andy was explaining the background of one cannon at the top of Edinburgh Castle. He said that back in the 16th century, this cannon was damaged during a raid and never repaired. Man, those Scottish are so lazy. And Scottish.
He said Scottish guards took advantage of this by stealing gold from the king and hiding it in the cannon until they could smuggle it out later. I was kind of skeptical, but Andy insisted that I look inside and try to find the gold, so we could give it to needy Scottish children. Like Scottish Oliver Twists.
I thought I smelled gunpowder, but Andy said that the cannon hadn't been fired in centuries and that I was probably just smelling big pieces of gold.
Andy is such a liar. I'm beginning to think there was never really any gold in there at all.
The New Pad
Having just moved into a fancy new pad, I decided to call up a friend to check out my new place, maybe even wok up some stir fry chicken and vegetables in my functional yet stylish new kitchen.
I gave Min Jung a tour of the place, starting with the bedroom. She was impressed with how smartly decorated and contemporary everything was. I credited it to watching a few episodes of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. Did you know that you should work in hair product from the back of the head to the front? It will make you look fabulous.
Over in the living room I pointed out my fancy sofa. The cushions are filled with landfowl feathers and a unique polyurethane foam which allows them to retain their shape and flexibility for maximum comfort. Not only that, but the soft upholstery is made from real kittens, all cute.
All of a sudden two complete strangers walked into my living room and started touching my stuff and asking questions about it. Min Jung asked if I knew who these people were. I had no idea, I thought maybe they were just really aggressive Latter-Day Saints missionaries.
But then all these other random people came in and started poking around too. I couldn't believe the nerve! I ordered them all to get out immediately and threatened to call the police. How dare these people invade my new house, my sacred, private sanctuary.
Most of the Mormons left, tossing strange and annoyed looks, but one of them stayed and yelled out some nonsense about this not being my house or even a house. It was preposterous, he was clearly crazy, yet his mormonic ramblings got me thinking. What if this really wasn't my house? Could my whole life be an elaborate lie?
Min Jung answered that question for me outside with several swift kicks to my torso and face. While fading into unconsciousness I took note that her shoe and the cement were not nearly as soft as my pretty kitten couch.
The Airport
Feeling restless, I decided to take a little jog while waiting for a flight at the Tampa airport.
While on my peaceful jog, I accidentally nudged a traveller who apparently was in a hurry to catch his flight.
In his rush, he and his baggage fell carelessly to the ground. I offered my apologies and tried to assist him back to his feet, but for some reason he seemed shocked, and even angered.
Eventually he dusted himself off and after we exchanged pleasantries he kindly offered to demonstrate to me the maximum allowed size of carry-on luggage.
thats all for now, more some other time. once again, the captions to the pictures WERE NOT written by me, they were copied and pasted from the site.
is it me, or does this guy look vaguely like nathaniel? hmmm....