PLEASE READ! I KNOW IT'S LONG BUT I HAVE ALOT TO SAY TO ALL OF YOU!
just here to clear the air...or at least give my side of the story.
ok. so starting a few weeks ago people started accusing me of being distant and a total bitch. no it's not just one person so if you are finding this post directed toward anyone in particular you are wrong. i was distant and i may have been a bitch (at least that's what i'm told) but it wasn't meant to be that way. i was dealing with a lot of shit so i kept three people close to me: Sara, Matt, and Tucker. you may think that Tucker is a peace of shit and he's shady and blah blah blah but he's chill from what i can see so whatever. he did not fuck with my life nor did he change it in any way that was negative. he was straight up with me when i needed it most. that's all. he's a good friend to me. please back off of my friendships. they are MY friendships, therefore none of you should have any say in them. i began to drift away from people that i love and they got pissed at me for it. i then became a bitch in thier eyes. (again this is not directed at any one person) so shit happened with my boyfriend and we broke up. this of course caused a shitload of drama in my life because everyone felt the need to get involved. rumors started that i broke jonathan's heart because i broke up with him and and i then became the antichrist in many eyes. another rumor started that i either cheated or was going to cheat on jonathan with tucker. yet another rumor is that i have been "making out with tucker every chance i get at school when i think no one is looking." and another is that i never even loved jonathan at all and i am now sick of him so i dumped him.
so here's the truth:
yes me and jonathan did break up but i never cheated on him and i was not planning on it with tucker or anyone else. i loved jonathan with all my heart and i still do. so much it fucking hurts. i did not dump him and he did not dump me. it was a mutual thing as far as i understand. if you find that an error then please refrain from telling me. the only person that i know of who is entitled to that opinion is jonathan himself. i don't care how close of a friend you are to him. if i'm wrong then HE should tell me. not anybody else. and me and tucker do not makeout at school or anywhere else. whoever the fuck it is that keeps saying this shit needs to shut the fuck up. tucker is my friend. i hang out with him cuz he's straight up and doesn't judge me like the rest of the world. it's refreshing to find someone like that and when i do i hold onto that whatever the cost. if you guys don't like it then fine. "disown me" or never speak to me again. that just shows what kind of a friend YOU are. not me.
please refrain from publically slandering me for shit that i did not do. it's stupid and it makes you look low. not me. unless you are a gullible person. and if you are then i have nothing to say to that other than wise up. those of you who know me and have known me for a very long time should take a look at what you are listening to. really think about who people are talking about. if the thought crosses your mind that "sydney would never do something like that" then you should think about what your hearing. if you're having doubts about what your hearing then come to me and ask ME about it and please consider your source. high school is nothing but a game of telephone and soon the rumors will turn into "oh my god didn't you hear? sydney's been fucking people for heroine and money over in the local 7 11! right by the drink vending machine! no i swear it's true! everyone has said the EXACT SAME THING so it MUST be true. oh my god don't look here she comes. god she's such a fucking slut. god i HATE her. how could she do that to jonathan?" so if ur gunna start a rumor make sure it's a good one. cause i would really enjoy how creative all of you can be.
pretty mcuh all i'm trying to say is stop the shit talking cause it's low and annoying. and you just make yourself look like another mindless teenager who can't think for themself. and stay out of other people's business. no one has the right to say that i don't love jonathan or any of the shit that's going around. no one. so please get the fuck off of my back.
i'm truely sorry to everyone that i pushed away this past month or so. shit's been hard and i couldn't handle the human race for a while there. i didn't mean to hurt anyone. i wasn't thinking about what it could cause. i want you all to know that i love you. i wouldn't be taking the time to write this if i didn't. if you found this post bitchy i'm sorry. i'm a little bitter about shit. i really hope you read this whole thing. it would mean a lot to me if you did. i'm not sitting here trying to change your mind about what you choose to believe. i'm just giving you my side of the story. take everything how you wish.
peace. love. nirvana.