No lithium last night. Let's go cause some chaos? I have a better idea. Let's be entertained by making our friends cry. It's fun, I swear! Invigorating. I want to fight. Let's take it out on one person. Choose the most worthy adversary. I want to be attacked. SadomasoWHAT? I don't think so. Just hostile. Fiending for blood and I don't ( Read more... )

I don't care if it hurts
I want to have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul

At the peak of my recovery, I have relapsed into tabloid junkie-dom. But I've only licked the surface of the evils that lie within. I'm still doing well. Sort of.

A new addiction to take its place: full realization of the Gwen Stefani infatuation. Lyrics lamer than fuck, but fascinating. I'll revel in this until the former subsides.

Fuck. I don't know where to go now that my hero is dead. I feel more horrified/furious/sorrowful/vengeful/heartbroken/anxious/worried/terrified/betrayed/guilty than I have in a very long time. He left us, just like that. Let us down, the people who loved and respected him. He is the reason I am who I am today. He has made a significant ( Read more... )

Not enough sleep. Woke up to screaming (surprisingly directed toward me) around 8 am after getting to sleep around 5:30. Not the most pleasant experience. Went back to bed around 8:30 until 10. That makes a combined 4 hours, if my math skills are still functional. Oh, this is funny: yesterday I thought six feet was 172 inches. Just... you ( Read more... )

Snizzatch! Ohhh today is nice. Yesterday was nice. All of it was nice once I got over the whole... you know, lonely, shitty, sad sort of crap. A letter from Leah was sensational, even though I was rather disappointed to find that the quarter-inch thick envelope was full of primarily a chapter from Unholy Ghost. But it turned out to be a ( Read more... )

cross your fingers and hold on tight. i'm ready for the reconstruction.

( fuck )

Yesterday started as the most perfect day I can remember having.  It was so incredible.  I thought that maybe, just maybe things were going to be alright after all.  Even though it  began with a blood test and my failure to come up with a design plan layout for my most recent project, it was good to have the stabbing over with and KoroKoro Himself ( Read more... )

Lots of work to do, but I don't feel the creative flow bubbling inside me, so I think I'll spill out some of this boringness to make room for the good stuff. Matteo came this weekend... I always love seeing him. Nothing makes my day better than the most beautiful boy EVER knocking on my door with roses. Ahhhhhhh. Only I could magane to turn ( Read more... )