conversations with cesc
For fragrants: Five things Cesc needed to hear from Robin.
i.
“Say it!”
“You’re ridiculous.”
“Say it!”
“No!”
“Say it or else!”
“What are you talking about?”
“Say it or I won’t sleep with you tonight.”
“…Desperate Housewives is…the best show ever.”
“Good. I really like it too.”
ii.
“Do these jeans make my butt look big?”
“Cesc…”
“Because I think they do.”
“Then why are you asking me?”
“I just need to know.”
“Well…”
“Déu meu! They do, don’t they?
“Would you go change?”
“No, I like it that way.”
iii.
“What time is it?”
“11:59.”
“Oh. What time is it now?”
“Cesc, you just asked me.”
“I know, but what time is it?”
“11:59.”
“Okay.”
“Why?”
“Nothing. Robin, what time is it?”
“Are you kidding me?”
“No.”
“I’m not telling you.”
“Why?”
“Because you’re being an ass.”
“You’re being an ass. I just want to know what time it is.”
“It’s 11:59!”
“Okay!”
“Okay.”
“…Robin…”
“Yes…Cesc?”
“What time is it?”
“…”
“Robin?”
“It’s midnight, Cesc.”
“Oh, good! Happy birthday!”
iv.
“Hello?”
“Robin! Congratulations!”
“Thank you, Cesc; it’s great.”
“I’ll bet! So how’s Cesc Jr.?”
“It’s Shaqueel.”
“What?”
“We named him Shaqueel.”
“But what happened to considering Cesc Jr.?”
“Well…it was considered.”
“And?”
“Bouchra said no.”
“But you told her you wanted it, yes?”
“Yes. No. Sort of.”
“I am livid.”
“I thought you were joking.”
“I can’t talk to you anymore.”
“Cesc-”
“Good-bye, father of Shaqueel.”
v.
“Robin, how do they say ‘I love you’ in Holland?”
“Ik hou van jou.”
“Okay.”
“Why?”
“Just wanted to hear you say it.”
i.
“Say it!”
“You’re ridiculous.”
“Say it!”
“No!”
“Say it or else!”
“What are you talking about?”
“Say it or I won’t sleep with you tonight.”
“…Desperate Housewives is…the best show ever.”
“Good. I really like it too.”
ii.
“Do these jeans make my butt look big?”
“Cesc…”
“Because I think they do.”
“Then why are you asking me?”
“I just need to know.”
“Well…”
“Déu meu! They do, don’t they?
“Would you go change?”
“No, I like it that way.”
iii.
“What time is it?”
“11:59.”
“Oh. What time is it now?”
“Cesc, you just asked me.”
“I know, but what time is it?”
“11:59.”
“Okay.”
“Why?”
“Nothing. Robin, what time is it?”
“Are you kidding me?”
“No.”
“I’m not telling you.”
“Why?”
“Because you’re being an ass.”
“You’re being an ass. I just want to know what time it is.”
“It’s 11:59!”
“Okay!”
“Okay.”
“…Robin…”
“Yes…Cesc?”
“What time is it?”
“…”
“Robin?”
“It’s midnight, Cesc.”
“Oh, good! Happy birthday!”
iv.
“Hello?”
“Robin! Congratulations!”
“Thank you, Cesc; it’s great.”
“I’ll bet! So how’s Cesc Jr.?”
“It’s Shaqueel.”
“What?”
“We named him Shaqueel.”
“But what happened to considering Cesc Jr.?”
“Well…it was considered.”
“And?”
“Bouchra said no.”
“But you told her you wanted it, yes?”
“Yes. No. Sort of.”
“I am livid.”
“I thought you were joking.”
“I can’t talk to you anymore.”
“Cesc-”
“Good-bye, father of Shaqueel.”
v.
“Robin, how do they say ‘I love you’ in Holland?”
“Ik hou van jou.”
“Okay.”
“Why?”
“Just wanted to hear you say it.”