Can you hear it? The pop pop pop of my thoughts, outlining the memoryglow of transluscent idealism, vaporized in a smoke of reoccuring confessions. The broken record song of a lovelost boy, intent on nothing better than a death before thirty and a minimal obituary. Coward. Shiftless loser. Your friends, your friends, they ride away with grand plans ( Read more... )

ohmygod... drinking... ohmygod... so much drinking ( Read more... )

So what is there left to say? Am I dangling on the strings of heart-lust naivety or maintaining an emotion imagined by most and felt by few? I cannot start drinking again. 5Am is not the time for complex thought. I am under, drowning in the cold, iceblock obscenity of it all. I am under, desperately silent, words cased in the bubble-glass of ( Read more... )

So I look at myself and I think: Am I what I was meant to be ( Read more... )

So I look at myself and I think: Am I what I was meant to be ( Read more... )

As soon as I spread my legs to the world, they fuck me. No foreplay, no kisses or hugs, they fuck me. The one thing that I wanted to do well got all shot to hell today as it was my screenplay reading. I worked on that thing a LOT. I mean hours and hours to make 30 pages worth of snappy dialogue and whatnot but by the end of the reading I ended up ( Read more... )

It's the little things. Little things being taken away that make all the difference in the world. A sound, a taste, a touch, a smell. Sometimes you don't realize how important the little things are until they're gone. Sometimes its the others who don't understand who continue to take it away ( Read more... )

I feel like my soul is being burnt away in the ashes on my breath. I can taste it like the changing of seasons, a human rust wearing me down to brittle bones. Someday soon I will be broken. I am not anyone who you could recognize anymore. You would see my eyes and shy from the nothing inside, a gray blackness too bored with itself to be worth any ( Read more... )

Here it is, the first act. For those who care to read it and the following two acts, it is badly formatted and composed primarily of: ultraviolence, potty jokes, foul language, drug usage, testicle loss, heavy-handed irony, severed limbs, film allusions, stolen scenes, pilfered stories, the scottish, archetypal characters, psychotic hallucinations ( Read more... )

I miss her.

I miss her and I don't know what I'm going to do without her.

Funny enough that this has been the same sentiment I've had for months but it still won't go away. She's the best thing to ever happen to me and I hate life without any friends left around me. I don't want to do this anymore.