Fic: April Showers
Fandom: Glee
Rating: I guess PG-13.
Characters: Will, Kurt
Spoilers: 1.05
Summary: Kurt's little problem didn't stop when April left Glee.
Author's Notes: My friend and I cowrote this and she's letting me post it here. Hope you all enjoy!
Kurt stares down his reflection in the bathroom mirror. A splash of cold water makes him feel a bit more human, but though he shakes his head, he still feels like everything's swimming slightly. He's late for Glee. All he has to do is get through practice and he can go home and pass out. Just get through the next few hours, Kurt. Man up. He heads out of the bathroom and down the hall.
A quick scan of the Glee practice room shows Will that there's one person missing. Frowning, he pokes his head out the practice room door to look up and down the deserted hallway. The men's room door opens and Kurt emerges, and Will breathes a sigh of relief. "There you are. Get in here, we're about to start warming up."
Kurt ducks his head, pushing into the room with just a hair less than his usual swagger. "Sorry," he tosses back, undoing the polished black buttons of his sweater. He feels way too warm already. He felt good just a little bit ago, felt loose and uninhibited. Now he just feels a little shaky. "Did you already hand out parts?"
Will takes a careful look at Kurt, his eyes narrowing. Kurt's eyes are glassy and red-rimmed, and he's swaying back and forth ever so slightly like he's on the deck of a ship. He places a hand on Kurt's shoulder to prevent him from going further into the room. His face is full of concern. "Kurt," he says in a lowered voice so the others won't hear. "You all right?"
"Yes, of course." Kurt tries to shrug him off, literally. He really just wants to get this over with. "Just didn't... eat much today. I'm trying to fit into this fall's collection. Stupid, I guess." He smiles, but catches his tongue between his teeth nervously.
Will opens his mouth to say more, but then Rachel interrupts. "Mr. Schuester," she chirps, "I don't mean to be rude, but you're cutting into my valuable solo-singing time. I could have run my part four times by now!" Will rolls his eyes at her, patting Kurt on the shoulder once before handing him the tenor part for their latest song.
Will keeps a wary eye on Kurt as he leads the rest of the team in warmups. The kid doesn't look so good.
Kurt takes a place in the back, following the group as best he can. No matter how hard he tries, he feels a half a beat behind, and his notes waver. Rachel keeps tossing him dirty looks, like somehow he's draining her of her own talent with his mistakes.
Schue takes them through a few scales and vocal warm ups, and by the time they're practicing enunciation, racing through tongue twisters, Kurt knows he's not going to make it through practice. Never should have come.
Rachel has him by the elbow in a vicelike grip. "You're apparently side-by-side with me when we come down the risers," she grumbles, looking down her nose at him, "despite obvious differences in both talent and height. Are you going to screw this up?" He shakes her loose, grabbing Will's attention and bobbing his head at the door. "Hey, Schuester? I need to--"
Kurt was slurring through the warmups, he's tripping over the simple dance steps, and he looks more and more miserable by the second. Will should be focusing on the group, trying to get them to perfect harmonies and dance steps, and the group looks and sounds great. The only thing keeping them from being a 10 in this rehearsal is Kurt. The group's near-perfection should make Will happier than it does.
Rachel hisses something in Kurt's ear and he blanches, leaving the rehearsal with some mumbled excuse, and Will is torn. He's got 11 fine performers and one basket case... he should stay, help Glee be its best so they can win regionals, but then he remembers what Emma and that motivational pamphlet on his office wall keep telling him: "Priority #1: Help the kids."
So he leaves them in the practice room, Rachel put in charge (she tosses her hair and her eyes sparkle) and he follows Kurt out into the hallway.
The door clicks behind Will, and Kurt whirls, gulping hurriedly and screwing the top back on his Deer Park bottle. "Sorry. I just--you know. Needed five. So are we...?"
"Kurt, are you..." Will stops dead, sniffing the air. Kurt's breath smells like alcohol, and suddenly everything starts to click into place. He points at the water bottle. "Kurt, is that... is that vodka?"
"N--" He shakes his head ineffectively, pointing at the blue label kind of lamely. "Just water, Schue. Really." His eyes flick to the exit, but it seems a thousand miles away. Even Will seems to be cutting in and out, way too close one second, out of reach the next. Kurt swallows hard, feeling unfocused and off balance. "I just don't feel so good. Maybe I should call it a day."
He sighs. "Here, why don't we...?" Will steers Kurt to a nearby bench, sitting down beside him. He sighs, unsure of how to begin. Even after five years of teaching, he's never exactly sure how to handle it when a student of his has trouble like this. He breaks the long silence between them by asking, "How long has this been going on?"
Kurt just looks down at his hands, twisting the cap of the bottle back and forth. "Am I in trouble?"
Will hesitates. "I don't want to have to tell Figgins about this. But if you keep this up, I'm going to have to."
"I didn't mean to keep it up. I just felt... She was right you know? She... said it'd make me brave enough to be whoever I wanted. It sounds completely..."
He sighs, rubbing a hand over his face. "It... I felt invulnerable."
Will closes his eyes; this is his fault, indirectly. He had kept letting April be a bad influence on his kids. "Kurt, just... I don't get it. You're a smart kid. You do well in school, and you've got a lot of friends in Glee. You helped the football team get its only win of the season. You're so incredibly talented, and you've got a lot to offer. You don't need to drink to get people to like you."
"Maybe. But... for a little while, it made me like myself." He just takes a breath, trying to force himself back to normal. "Then it stopped working as well, and now..." A small laugh. "Now I just feel kind of sick."
Will gives him a small smile. "Yeah. Booze tends to do that." He sobers. "You know, you always struck me as one of the most confident people I knew, who didn't care what other people thought. You danced to Beyonce at football tryouts, didn't you?" He smiles at him again. "Maybe some people would look down on you for that, but I never thought people like that were worth bothering with."
"Confident?" He scoffs. "Doesn't keep me from getting tossed in the Dumpster every morning."
"Or did you not know about that?" He leans his elbows on his knees. "I want Glee to succeed as much as you, Schue. I'll stop. For the group. But it's really never been about what people think. It's what they can do to you."
"I... I didn't know about that." He pauses, remembering how he passes Kurt and Puck and the football team outside the dumpsters every day. He curses himself again. Was he really that blind? "It's good that you're stopping, Kurt. It's not just about the good of the group; this behavior really isn't healthy. I could quote the health book, but... I'm guessing you've heard most of it in health class."
"Yeah, probably more than I ever wanted to know."
He nods. "If you need help quitting, I can help you. AA meets in the auditorium on Wednesday afternoons."
Kurt sighs softly. "I didn't think it could get this bad. But..." He rolls the clear plastic bottle in his hands. "They're probably wondering where you are."
The pitch-perfect strains of "Don't Stop Believin'" are barely audible through the closed choir room door, and he smiles. "I think Rachel can handle them for now." He holds his hand out, palm flat and facing up, for the water bottle.
Kurt's hand tightens around it, causing the plastic to crinkle audibly. After a beat, he reaches over, letting it drop into Schue's palm.
"She can take care of things pretty well. Even though she's kind of drama queen about it." He gives Will a small smile.
He sighs. "Yeah, I know." We'll have to work on that, he thinks privately. He gets up, going over to the water fountain to pour the vodka out of the Deer Park bottle. "Why don't you go home and get some rest? You're not looking so good right now."
"I... I probably should. But... I don't like to go home before five. Can't I just... stay here?"
Will smiles and nods. "You can sit in if you don't think you're up for singing and dancing. The others will understand that you're not feeling well." He thoroughly rinses out the water bottle in the fountain before filling it back up with water. "Here, sip this slowly. It'll help with the nausea. And I think I've got some crackers in my office if you want those."
"Thanks." He's a little surprised by the generosity, but maybe he shouldn't be. "You're alright, Schue." He cracks a grin. "When I make it big, I'll include you in my dedication speech."\
Will grins back. "Thanks. You're pretty great yourself, Kurt." He holds the chorus room door open for him just as the music builds to a crescendo.
Rating: I guess PG-13.
Characters: Will, Kurt
Spoilers: 1.05
Summary: Kurt's little problem didn't stop when April left Glee.
Author's Notes: My friend and I cowrote this and she's letting me post it here. Hope you all enjoy!
Kurt stares down his reflection in the bathroom mirror. A splash of cold water makes him feel a bit more human, but though he shakes his head, he still feels like everything's swimming slightly. He's late for Glee. All he has to do is get through practice and he can go home and pass out. Just get through the next few hours, Kurt. Man up. He heads out of the bathroom and down the hall.
A quick scan of the Glee practice room shows Will that there's one person missing. Frowning, he pokes his head out the practice room door to look up and down the deserted hallway. The men's room door opens and Kurt emerges, and Will breathes a sigh of relief. "There you are. Get in here, we're about to start warming up."
Kurt ducks his head, pushing into the room with just a hair less than his usual swagger. "Sorry," he tosses back, undoing the polished black buttons of his sweater. He feels way too warm already. He felt good just a little bit ago, felt loose and uninhibited. Now he just feels a little shaky. "Did you already hand out parts?"
Will takes a careful look at Kurt, his eyes narrowing. Kurt's eyes are glassy and red-rimmed, and he's swaying back and forth ever so slightly like he's on the deck of a ship. He places a hand on Kurt's shoulder to prevent him from going further into the room. His face is full of concern. "Kurt," he says in a lowered voice so the others won't hear. "You all right?"
"Yes, of course." Kurt tries to shrug him off, literally. He really just wants to get this over with. "Just didn't... eat much today. I'm trying to fit into this fall's collection. Stupid, I guess." He smiles, but catches his tongue between his teeth nervously.
Will opens his mouth to say more, but then Rachel interrupts. "Mr. Schuester," she chirps, "I don't mean to be rude, but you're cutting into my valuable solo-singing time. I could have run my part four times by now!" Will rolls his eyes at her, patting Kurt on the shoulder once before handing him the tenor part for their latest song.
Will keeps a wary eye on Kurt as he leads the rest of the team in warmups. The kid doesn't look so good.
Kurt takes a place in the back, following the group as best he can. No matter how hard he tries, he feels a half a beat behind, and his notes waver. Rachel keeps tossing him dirty looks, like somehow he's draining her of her own talent with his mistakes.
Schue takes them through a few scales and vocal warm ups, and by the time they're practicing enunciation, racing through tongue twisters, Kurt knows he's not going to make it through practice. Never should have come.
Rachel has him by the elbow in a vicelike grip. "You're apparently side-by-side with me when we come down the risers," she grumbles, looking down her nose at him, "despite obvious differences in both talent and height. Are you going to screw this up?" He shakes her loose, grabbing Will's attention and bobbing his head at the door. "Hey, Schuester? I need to--"
Kurt was slurring through the warmups, he's tripping over the simple dance steps, and he looks more and more miserable by the second. Will should be focusing on the group, trying to get them to perfect harmonies and dance steps, and the group looks and sounds great. The only thing keeping them from being a 10 in this rehearsal is Kurt. The group's near-perfection should make Will happier than it does.
Rachel hisses something in Kurt's ear and he blanches, leaving the rehearsal with some mumbled excuse, and Will is torn. He's got 11 fine performers and one basket case... he should stay, help Glee be its best so they can win regionals, but then he remembers what Emma and that motivational pamphlet on his office wall keep telling him: "Priority #1: Help the kids."
So he leaves them in the practice room, Rachel put in charge (she tosses her hair and her eyes sparkle) and he follows Kurt out into the hallway.
The door clicks behind Will, and Kurt whirls, gulping hurriedly and screwing the top back on his Deer Park bottle. "Sorry. I just--you know. Needed five. So are we...?"
"Kurt, are you..." Will stops dead, sniffing the air. Kurt's breath smells like alcohol, and suddenly everything starts to click into place. He points at the water bottle. "Kurt, is that... is that vodka?"
"N--" He shakes his head ineffectively, pointing at the blue label kind of lamely. "Just water, Schue. Really." His eyes flick to the exit, but it seems a thousand miles away. Even Will seems to be cutting in and out, way too close one second, out of reach the next. Kurt swallows hard, feeling unfocused and off balance. "I just don't feel so good. Maybe I should call it a day."
He sighs. "Here, why don't we...?" Will steers Kurt to a nearby bench, sitting down beside him. He sighs, unsure of how to begin. Even after five years of teaching, he's never exactly sure how to handle it when a student of his has trouble like this. He breaks the long silence between them by asking, "How long has this been going on?"
Kurt just looks down at his hands, twisting the cap of the bottle back and forth. "Am I in trouble?"
Will hesitates. "I don't want to have to tell Figgins about this. But if you keep this up, I'm going to have to."
"I didn't mean to keep it up. I just felt... She was right you know? She... said it'd make me brave enough to be whoever I wanted. It sounds completely..."
He sighs, rubbing a hand over his face. "It... I felt invulnerable."
Will closes his eyes; this is his fault, indirectly. He had kept letting April be a bad influence on his kids. "Kurt, just... I don't get it. You're a smart kid. You do well in school, and you've got a lot of friends in Glee. You helped the football team get its only win of the season. You're so incredibly talented, and you've got a lot to offer. You don't need to drink to get people to like you."
"Maybe. But... for a little while, it made me like myself." He just takes a breath, trying to force himself back to normal. "Then it stopped working as well, and now..." A small laugh. "Now I just feel kind of sick."
Will gives him a small smile. "Yeah. Booze tends to do that." He sobers. "You know, you always struck me as one of the most confident people I knew, who didn't care what other people thought. You danced to Beyonce at football tryouts, didn't you?" He smiles at him again. "Maybe some people would look down on you for that, but I never thought people like that were worth bothering with."
"Confident?" He scoffs. "Doesn't keep me from getting tossed in the Dumpster every morning."
"Or did you not know about that?" He leans his elbows on his knees. "I want Glee to succeed as much as you, Schue. I'll stop. For the group. But it's really never been about what people think. It's what they can do to you."
"I... I didn't know about that." He pauses, remembering how he passes Kurt and Puck and the football team outside the dumpsters every day. He curses himself again. Was he really that blind? "It's good that you're stopping, Kurt. It's not just about the good of the group; this behavior really isn't healthy. I could quote the health book, but... I'm guessing you've heard most of it in health class."
"Yeah, probably more than I ever wanted to know."
He nods. "If you need help quitting, I can help you. AA meets in the auditorium on Wednesday afternoons."
Kurt sighs softly. "I didn't think it could get this bad. But..." He rolls the clear plastic bottle in his hands. "They're probably wondering where you are."
The pitch-perfect strains of "Don't Stop Believin'" are barely audible through the closed choir room door, and he smiles. "I think Rachel can handle them for now." He holds his hand out, palm flat and facing up, for the water bottle.
Kurt's hand tightens around it, causing the plastic to crinkle audibly. After a beat, he reaches over, letting it drop into Schue's palm.
"She can take care of things pretty well. Even though she's kind of drama queen about it." He gives Will a small smile.
He sighs. "Yeah, I know." We'll have to work on that, he thinks privately. He gets up, going over to the water fountain to pour the vodka out of the Deer Park bottle. "Why don't you go home and get some rest? You're not looking so good right now."
"I... I probably should. But... I don't like to go home before five. Can't I just... stay here?"
Will smiles and nods. "You can sit in if you don't think you're up for singing and dancing. The others will understand that you're not feeling well." He thoroughly rinses out the water bottle in the fountain before filling it back up with water. "Here, sip this slowly. It'll help with the nausea. And I think I've got some crackers in my office if you want those."
"Thanks." He's a little surprised by the generosity, but maybe he shouldn't be. "You're alright, Schue." He cracks a grin. "When I make it big, I'll include you in my dedication speech."\
Will grins back. "Thanks. You're pretty great yourself, Kurt." He holds the chorus room door open for him just as the music builds to a crescendo.