Tonight I shook the hand of Neil Innes, and he pretty much told me that he didn't mind if I ripped off everything that he and the Bonzos had ever done. It's a process called 'Ruttling', apparently.

See the nascent socialist state in Russia represented by an excited small child who later has a nap!

8/10

Not half as bad as some cynical sods who haven't actually seen it would have you believe.

6/10

It doesn't half go on, but it doesn't matter because all of the 'going on' is good.

8/10

Tonight I accompanied a pet rat as far as I could to the Great Beyond. By which I mean that I wrapped her up in my jumper and tried to make her as comfortable as possible as she died. I've done that before, but for some reason this time it has made me think about my potential career path. Archaeology obviously involves dead people, but tends ( Read more... )

Teenagers should not be allowed near drugs.

8/10

Muslims are being told that they can't wear veils, Christians aren't allowed to show crucifixes but nobody's putting me in the news because of my beliefs. But not for long. I'm going to make myself a t-shirt saying 'AGNOSTIC' across the front, which I shall wear proudly whenever possible. Expect to see me in the newspapers when I'm told to take it ( Read more... )

Apparently Paul McCartney is admitting to beating up his mono-legged wife, but only because she said that she 'fancied a bacon sandwich'. Any man has his limits though.

I didn't realise that they had women as sexy as Paulette Goddard in the 1930s.

9/10

The colours, dear god, the colours.

7/10