I don't think it would be that bad if I woke up one day as an animal. No complexity, just a simple functioning brain. Only does what it needs to do
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Then some 4 foot tall guy jumps on your back and starts hitting you with a stick until you start running really fast, and then he keeps hitting you and hitting you until after awhile he stops and you stop running and everyone is cheering and clapping and it seems like you're some some sort of hero but then before you know it your in a little cage with wheels attached to the back of a car and you have to stand in one spot for twelve hours while the car drives along and eventually you stop and they release you from the cage but as soon as they do they little guy jumps on your back again and starts hitting you so you start running again and you keep running and then the hitting stops and you stop running and everyone is clapping again and they feed you sugar cubes and you think that maybe this isnt such a bad life so you put up with the long rides in the cage and the hitting and the running and everything until one day when the little guy stops hitting you and you stop running everyone is still clapping and cheering but you realise that
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Giant panda's (and maybe all types of panda) are like an endangered species so you wouldn't likely have too many friends to hang around and eat bamboo shoots with. I watch them all the time on these zoo webcams where they are trying to make them "fuck to save [their] own species" and they only have like 3 full size pandas at each zoo. And thats so sad...I think I'm going to cry!
As if you couldn't guess, I reckon being a monkey, perhaps of the spider monkey variety, would be the sauce. You can pick up things with your tail, swing through the trees with your tail, and a lot of types of monkeys are like communal group living styles which would end up with me hanging out and picking up some monkey tail.
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Hey Tiger, wake upppp... (shoots tiger with tranquilizer)
Laidies and Gentlemen, Introducing.... ANASTACIA!
She loves'a show business, so much nicer than the savages of the jungle, yeah?
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As if you couldn't guess, I reckon being a monkey, perhaps of the spider monkey variety, would be the sauce. You can pick up things with your tail, swing through the trees with your tail, and a lot of types of monkeys are like communal group living styles which would end up with me hanging out and picking up some monkey tail.
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