Arg... poly can be so hard sometimes! People (mostly not poly) think it's just about more chances to get laid. But it's also about more chances to get hurt. If I were there I'd give you big hugs and tell you you will feel OK someday, even though you know that. ;)
We need a Poly Angst FB page or LJ group or something, where we can all moan and sigh and rant, and feel understood...
Instead of posting about my fear of being left, I made a post about how some of my fwbs are being stupid and pressuring for sexual intercourse when they know Brian's the only one who gets that.
The responses varied from "are you sure you're being clear about your boundaries?" to "wow, I could NEVER be with someone who's adamant about no sex" to "damn right you shouldn't put up with being pressured, if they can't deal with the rules they can leave!"
It all makes me think about how I shouldn't be so upset by the loss of one person when I have others to console me, but I would rather have Pat than all of my casual lovers. Still, I don't think I can live with the option of never being able to play around again, so for long term this is for the best.
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We need a Poly Angst FB page or LJ group or something, where we can all moan and sigh and rant, and feel understood...
Reply
Instead of posting about my fear of being left, I made a post about how some of my fwbs are being stupid and pressuring for sexual intercourse when they know Brian's the only one who gets that.
The responses varied from "are you sure you're being clear about your boundaries?" to "wow, I could NEVER be with someone who's adamant about no sex" to "damn right you shouldn't put up with being pressured, if they can't deal with the rules they can leave!"
It all makes me think about how I shouldn't be so upset by the loss of one person when I have others to console me, but I would rather have Pat than all of my casual lovers. Still, I don't think I can live with the option of never being able to play around again, so for long term this is for the best.
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