You're so right. B is that forgiving with me, even though I still need to remember and learn to be more forgiving. I'm not sure if it was from my parents, but I definitely have the mindset that there's always blame, and B has on many occasions reminded me that it's not an issue of blame...
yes, exactly. why must the issue always come down to blame and finger pointing? why must people be defensive? why are people afraid to say, "yes i'm wrong" or "yes you're right"? do we lose very much by just admitting the other person is right?
anyway i think whoever's wrong or right, doesn't matter. things will be put right quickest if both parties have an attitude of "you're not to blame, it's okay". if neither is blaming the other, the whole matter will be over in 2 seconds.
on the other hand, people thinking you're blaming them, is also tiresome.
actually it's not even about admitting the other person is right. people are more willing to be generous when they have been shown generosity, like in your example in your entry.
so once one person goes i'm sorry, i was wrong, the other person is more likely to go "no it's alright, i'm sorry too"
but if you start with "it's all your fault!" the other person is going to go onto "no it's not, etc"
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Who am I trying to blame here?? ;-)
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anyway i think whoever's wrong or right, doesn't matter. things will be put right quickest if both parties have an attitude of "you're not to blame, it's okay". if neither is blaming the other, the whole matter will be over in 2 seconds.
on the other hand, people thinking you're blaming them, is also tiresome.
ok i'm tired just thinking about it. zzzzz.
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so once one person goes i'm sorry, i was wrong, the other person is more likely to go "no it's alright, i'm sorry too"
but if you start with "it's all your fault!" the other person is going to go onto "no it's not, etc"
natural instinct.
ok i'm tired.
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