36.001 - Release
Is it ever gonna be enough?
--"Gold Guns Girls," Metric
A version of the following was posted on Twitter. It has a lot of abrasive language. Consider yourself warned. Bracketed statements have been added for narrative context that Twitter doesn't need/doesn't have room for.
About a year ago, I was verbally assaulted on Twitter because I wondered aloud whether trans boob size insecurity was tied to internalized misogyny. Moments prior to the assault, I realized that I didn't have enough cultural research on the topic and that I'd hold my tongue until then. [I'm not holding my tongue any longer.]
The assault made my life worse[, despite it giving me one of my allies as one of the consequences]; it confirmed my fears that the trans community, like the tea party, harps too much on ideological purity. Just as the tea party makes the left feel isolated and betrayed, leftist ideological purity also isolates the right and causes people to hate [each other].
As I mentioned last night, I watched the World Naked Bike Ride to support sex-positive and green initiatives. There was a side effect. I have never seen thousands of pairs of naked breasts being celebrated before like that. And they were all shapes and sizes, not just big.
The point isn't that we buy into heteromasculine expectations of transfemale boobery, but that we [as transwomen] do for ourselves what is comfortable. I asserted that much [prior to the assault, alongside] my fears of sex-negative [misogynist] coercion, and that I was bullied for sharing anti-sex-negative views is telling.
If I want small boobs, IT MAKES YOU A FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT TO TELL ME I'M A TRANSMISOGYNIST SOLELY FOR THAT. FUCK YOU.
As far as I can tell, every trans community I've ever interacted with is sex-negative, using ethical slut language to defend themselves. Being an ethical slut doesn't make you sex-positive; it makes you a slut that actually treats sex partners and yourself well. Being sex-positive means that you appreciate sexual diversity and condemn society's subjugation of our bodies. This fight against the subjugation of our bodies is something that trans people should understand well, but this is apparently not the case.
Thus, your pressure for me to just "open up" and be polyamorous and/or casual and/or pansexual is sex-negative all to fuck. Your pressure for em to be pansexual is as bad as heterosexual assholes telling me to "wait until I'm done transitioning" before I date again [since transitioning never actually begins or ends; it just is]. You telling me that there is only one [Western-based prototypical] transwoman body, with giant boobs, is as bad as heterosexual males calling ciswomen fat and ugly [as a tool of the oppressor].
You see, my only sexual relationship was abusive, and all be damned if I EVER repeat that shit again. So your sex negativity can go to hell.
In all, EVEN IF IT KILLS ME, fuck you weak Twitter trans[female] people who enable abuse and hatred. FUCK YOU ALL.
But don't worry, you weak pieces of shit, I won't be long. I really do believe it will kill me now. But I [finally] feel liberated from that hateful day. Fuck.
--"Gold Guns Girls," Metric
A version of the following was posted on Twitter. It has a lot of abrasive language. Consider yourself warned. Bracketed statements have been added for narrative context that Twitter doesn't need/doesn't have room for.
About a year ago, I was verbally assaulted on Twitter because I wondered aloud whether trans boob size insecurity was tied to internalized misogyny. Moments prior to the assault, I realized that I didn't have enough cultural research on the topic and that I'd hold my tongue until then. [I'm not holding my tongue any longer.]
The assault made my life worse[, despite it giving me one of my allies as one of the consequences]; it confirmed my fears that the trans community, like the tea party, harps too much on ideological purity. Just as the tea party makes the left feel isolated and betrayed, leftist ideological purity also isolates the right and causes people to hate [each other].
As I mentioned last night, I watched the World Naked Bike Ride to support sex-positive and green initiatives. There was a side effect. I have never seen thousands of pairs of naked breasts being celebrated before like that. And they were all shapes and sizes, not just big.
The point isn't that we buy into heteromasculine expectations of transfemale boobery, but that we [as transwomen] do for ourselves what is comfortable. I asserted that much [prior to the assault, alongside] my fears of sex-negative [misogynist] coercion, and that I was bullied for sharing anti-sex-negative views is telling.
If I want small boobs, IT MAKES YOU A FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT TO TELL ME I'M A TRANSMISOGYNIST SOLELY FOR THAT. FUCK YOU.
As far as I can tell, every trans community I've ever interacted with is sex-negative, using ethical slut language to defend themselves. Being an ethical slut doesn't make you sex-positive; it makes you a slut that actually treats sex partners and yourself well. Being sex-positive means that you appreciate sexual diversity and condemn society's subjugation of our bodies. This fight against the subjugation of our bodies is something that trans people should understand well, but this is apparently not the case.
Thus, your pressure for me to just "open up" and be polyamorous and/or casual and/or pansexual is sex-negative all to fuck. Your pressure for em to be pansexual is as bad as heterosexual assholes telling me to "wait until I'm done transitioning" before I date again [since transitioning never actually begins or ends; it just is]. You telling me that there is only one [Western-based prototypical] transwoman body, with giant boobs, is as bad as heterosexual males calling ciswomen fat and ugly [as a tool of the oppressor].
You see, my only sexual relationship was abusive, and all be damned if I EVER repeat that shit again. So your sex negativity can go to hell.
In all, EVEN IF IT KILLS ME, fuck you weak Twitter trans[female] people who enable abuse and hatred. FUCK YOU ALL.
But don't worry, you weak pieces of shit, I won't be long. I really do believe it will kill me now. But I [finally] feel liberated from that hateful day. Fuck.