[So anonymous, writing a bit shaky]
Dear Sir Who Tossed the First Muffin,
While I deeply sympathize with your plight (as it is the same one currently shared by eight score patients in this facility), I would strongly suggest finding alternative methods of expressing your moral outrage. Finger painting, perhaps. A rousing game of Uno. Or maybe keeping the violent revolt where it belongs - in your dreams.
Should you not be trapped in solitary during lunch and have the pleasure of joining us again in our common dining room, please have the courtesy to consider your actions before you commit them. Take a long, hard look at your fish and chips. Waft in the smell. Observe their pristine, breaded perfection. Culinary work at its finest. If that does not entice you to believe they would be put to better use in your stomach as opposed to buffeting other people about the head, then I hope my chair hurtling into your gut will be a better deterrent. I refuse to spend another shift doing impersonations of a water hose with my face simply because you lack the brain cells to realize that pulling crap while under military supervision is an abysmally stupid idea.
Sincerely Yours,
- A Concerned Citizen.
While I deeply sympathize with your plight (as it is the same one currently shared by eight score patients in this facility), I would strongly suggest finding alternative methods of expressing your moral outrage. Finger painting, perhaps. A rousing game of Uno. Or maybe keeping the violent revolt where it belongs - in your dreams.
Should you not be trapped in solitary during lunch and have the pleasure of joining us again in our common dining room, please have the courtesy to consider your actions before you commit them. Take a long, hard look at your fish and chips. Waft in the smell. Observe their pristine, breaded perfection. Culinary work at its finest. If that does not entice you to believe they would be put to better use in your stomach as opposed to buffeting other people about the head, then I hope my chair hurtling into your gut will be a better deterrent. I refuse to spend another shift doing impersonations of a water hose with my face simply because you lack the brain cells to realize that pulling crap while under military supervision is an abysmally stupid idea.
Sincerely Yours,
- A Concerned Citizen.