95% of the time I am sucessful in what I do. The other 5% is faked. It's sometimes difficult to deal with the thoughts of failing at something you put your heart into. Do you understand what that feeling of failure can do to a man. because ultimately I feel like all eyes are on me. everyone is looking for direction. I'm supposed to be a leader. I'm ( Read more... )

I was awakened in the night again by this myseterious bird that has been harking at my window. As I said before it's still dark out and this thing is singing to it's hearts content. I looked at the clock and it wasn't even 4:30 am just yet. But this time it wasn't in the tree by the window, it must have been a bit further off even though I could ( Read more... )

I awoke shivering with my backside exposed to the morning's chill. I turned to see the warm figure lying next to me had not only put their pyjamas on sometime during the night, but had also stolen all of the comforter. I tugged at it slowly so as not to rouse them. I knew they hadn't been sleeping well in my absence. It was good to see them so ( Read more... )

Today was really putrid ( Read more... )

I've officially returned home today. I have an amazing post in the works in which I will tell you all about my trip. Unfortunately I'm feeling very ill. I think I'm suffering some form of anxiety and I really haven't analyzed it to see where it's coming from. There is this feeling that I'm hopped up on caffeine or a small dose of cocaine. My hands ( Read more... )

If you are in AC can you please take me and the rest of Blur off your friendlist! a_james, Coxon_graham, cneat_james, and fionafied (who isn't part of blur but remove her because she doesn't play there anymore either) If you are keeping us because you enjoy reading our posts then just comment and say so. You will be left on

I'm making lists again. Lists of things I need to do before I leave. Lists of things I need to pack. Lists of things I need to bring back with me or rather lists of people I want to bring something back for. Some of them mental, some of them I've written on small pieces of stationary. There is definitely something magical about paper and hand ( Read more... )

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I grew up in Colchester, Essex. I attended six form at Stanway Comprehensive. That's where I met Coxon. We had several classes together and I had taken notice of him a few times. He was always quiet and kept his head down and his hands in his pockets. His shag brown hair hanging over his thick rimmed glasses. Not much different than he is now. He ( Read more... )

I'm going to be forward with something. It is something that is becoming less and less of a secret. There are those who know. There are those who pretend to know. And there are those who will find themselves in utter shock and disbelief ( Read more... )