FIC: What We Know (STXI, PG13)

[danahid]

Almost a year ago, I wrote my first story in the STXI fandom, The Things You See and The Way You See Them. This story is a sort-of bookend to that story. It is a "stupid writing experiment" and a character study of Jim Kirk as a leader. It has been incubating for almost six months and it would never have gotten done without the help and

Comments

[snakelights]

I truly adore this fic. I love seeing how Jim is perceived by the crew.

[danahid]

Thank you so much for your lovely comment! I started the story wanting to explain how the crew might have gone from tolerating their baby captain to accepting and admiring him, and I'm hoping that I achieved that a little bit. Thanks again for taking the time to read and let me know that you liked it.

[c_s_s_]

I kind of fell in love with this story.

[danahid]

I'm so glad. Thank you so much for taking the time to read and leave such a lovely comment!

[anon_j_anon]

This is excellent. The first person plural worked so well, and you could get a sense of the group that was forming. In a lot of ways, as the group got to know Captain Kirk better, they began to unite-- you started off by telling about all the different impressions people had of Kirk and each of their attitudes, and ended with the group having the one purpose of serving their captain to the best of their ability. The evolution of the group's understanding of the captain (as well as Kirk's growth and change) was paced perfectly. I also enjoyed the interplay between groups and individuals. I mean, there's obviously Captain Kirk and his core command officers, but you pull away from the group with characters like Hannity, Singh, and Matthews.

I reread your "The Things You See" and I don't think anyone can do outsider perspective like you. (Half tempted to ask you to write an outsider's perspective for Observations because now I'm super curious, :P

[danahid]

Thank you so much, darling, for your thoughtful and thought-provoking feedback! It means so much that you thought this piece "excellent" -- I admire your writing very much. I glad you liked the narrative choices I made, and that you thought the first-person plural worked in general. It was a much trickier voice to figure out than I thought it would be!

Thank you for re-reading "The Things You See" -- I'm blushing at your kind words. I adore outsider perspective, and it's something I often gravitate towards both for stories to read and (obviously) to write. I am intrigued by the idea of writing an outsider's perspective on Observations -- hmmm! I think it would be quite fascinating (to borrow a phrase

[anon_j_anon]

I remember our very brief discussion about first person plural and the cultural attitudes that some countries take. I'm glad for blood pacts-- they make great writing. :D

Yay hc bingo! (I still need to get back on emluv for her fic... should get on that. I read it, but now need to compile my thoughts and comments.) Looking forward to the sequel.

And what you said about leadership-- I've definitely had a lot of thoughts about exactly what you said. Your comments made me reconsider the Canteen Incident, actually. The speech that Jim made was great and inspiring, but it also struck me as too speechy (looking for an adjective here-- constructed? obvious? rhetorical? righteous?). I have no doubt that he believed in everything he said, I have no doubt that the anger he felt towards Dunlu was sincere, but it was as though he was trying too hard be a leader, assert that this is his ship and crew and no one messes with them. I kept thinking of how someone more seasoned (and therefore with more presence and aura of power/authority,

[danahid]

I remember that discussion too. :-) And I agree, blood pacts are awesome. Have you read garryowen's extraordinary fic? The language is so beautiful it makes my chest ache.

And yes, I think you've officially provoked a sequel to this. I blame you completely. :-P

Re: the Canteen Incident: Good observations! That speech was totally a newbie's speech. It was good drama, but lacked all subtlety. It made its point, and Jim usually finds a way to make his point, so that was true to him....

In a way, this entire piece is Jim Kirk's application of textbook command school concepts. He does have to start somewhere. Somewhere for him just happens to be in the deep end, so he's paddling furiously and trying to look serene and in control on the surface. (Like ducks do, LOL.)

I like thinking about learning curves too. :-)

[adafrog]

Great fic. Loved it, thanks.

[danahid]

Thank you so much!

[aishuu]

This is beautiful - you did a wonderful job on the second person plural narrative, and the observations were moving. Love it.

[danahid]

Thank you so much for taking the time to read and leave such a lovely comment!

[aishuu]

As soon as I commented, I realized it was first person. My brain's half asleep, but that doesn't change the fact this is awesome.

[danahid]

No worries! I knew what you meant. :-)

Thank you again!