"Realizing you aren't good enough anymore for your boyfriend of a little over a year is pretty shocking."You are wrong. He's the one who wasn't good enough for you, and all that you are capable of giving. Someone like him was not ready for someone amazing like you. He needs someone who he can lie to, and betray, and take down his path of destruction, and that person is not supposed to be you
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I guess it wasn't that I only think I'm not good enough for him... I honestly have no clue if that is how he feels, too. He just hasn't really showed many emotions towards what's been going on and I want more than anything to be with him. And all he told me before today is that he doesn't want a relationship, probably because he is scared. I know he changed a lot for the bad, and I too keep thinking that maybe things could be worked out. I just don't know really what to think anymore. We have talked since I wrote this, since we went out to lunch together today to try and cheer both of us up... he told me he is really trying to figure out what is going on. He isn't sure if he loves me the same way he did, and that just about made me die... but we've been through so much I can't blame everything entirely on him. He said he still loves me, though, he is just trying to figure out how... to see if there is any chance we could fix things and be the way we were
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I know you want to be with him. You can only think of the good things that happened between you two, and it's like all of the reasons that you broke up dissappear and don't seem important... But they are important. They are very important. I want nothing more than my best friend back, but even if we did patch things up somehow, it is not going to be the way things were, just like things aren't going to be good for you if you go crawling back to him. There is ALWAYS that stage after the "break up," of either a friendship or a relationship, but it will pass
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It's been three weeks since we broke up and I'm still so torn up over it though. If we ever got back together it will be because he wants ME. Not the other way around. I'm not mad at you for saying that at all, I understand full and well that it would be stupid for me to go back to him. Things are just so crazy. He doesn't know what he wants, and I know that I want things to be at least close to the way they were if we were to EVER get back together. The way I feel about him when I'm not around him is crazy, and today... whether he wants to hear me complain or not, I'm going to tell him exactly how I feel. About everything
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