[BITCH FEST] 2/?
Title: Bitch Fest [2/?]
Pairing: N/A in this part. Might come into play later.
Genre: Crack. Fail!Humour
Summary: Bitches get bitten back, but Heechul has other plans up his sleeve.
A/N: After SNSD"s Oh! I got too high, so I whipped this up. I'm still high. Ahhh KwonYuri <333 Comments are much loved. It's going to get funner writing next part :D :D :D
“I’m not an airhead…” Donghae said quietly halfway through dinner. He put down his fork and looked at each and every member. “I can be a good father, and husband, and I will, I will love my kids.”
Heechul snorted, sending juice out of his nostrils while Sungmin looked like he was about to explode with laughter. Leeteuk glared at the two before they somehow managed to prevent themselves from dying on the spot.
“We will be happy and my kids will all call you uncle.” Yesung bit his bottom lip while Ryeowook busied himself with his rice bowl. Eunhyuk and Hankyung looked like they were about to cry. Siwon picked at a piece of vegetable on his plate, while Shindong continued draining the last drop of his grapefruit juice.
“Sungmin, we have to go out.” Heechul nudged him with his elbow, connecting his bony joint to his soft flesh. The two knew that once eye contact was made between them, it was all over.
Sungmin squirmed before he hastily pulled a jacket out of the closet as the two fumbled outside, their jackets half worn, their shoes barely even on their feet as the door slammed shut.
Leeteuk swore he heard the two laughing downstairs.
~ || ~
“LEE SUNGMIN.” Sunny screamed into his ear after their radio show just ended. She threw the red head phones onto the table, narrowly missing the laptop. “So I should act more mature now, ehh. So I should stop all this cuteness act, right?”
Sungmin swallowed with much difficulty. He already sensed that there was a different air to Sunny during their radio show.
“No… why would you say that.” Sungmin leaned in and motioned for a hug to end their collaboration. It had been a part of their weekly ritual.
“Get away from me.” Sunny stomped on his foot and walked out of the door without looking back.
“Sunny-ah…” Sungmin hopped his way out of the door, chasing after the girl. “Sunny-ah!!”
~ || ~
“Heechul-sshi?” Jokwon pulled him aside after filming Star King.
“Ah yes. Jo Kwon-sshi.” Heechul flashed a smile at the other man.
“You can take off your smile, it’s okay.” Jo Kwon said with a hint of bitterness. “I was wondering if we should… settle our misunderstandings?”
“What misunderstandings?” Heechul leaned against the wall. He despised being put on the spot like this.
Jo Kwon smiled at his awkwardness. “Oh, I’ve just been hearing some rather nasty comments about me…”
“So, you’re implying that I said them. Why Jo Kwon-sshi…”
“You can stop with the fakeness.” Jo Kwon smiled before he patted him on the head. “I think it’s best if we avoid each other. Let’s just keep this from the media, okay?”
“But… I…” Heechul stuttered as Jo Kwon headed down the hallway. “Chea~ Your face still needs some work.”
~ || ~
Sungmin was half asleep on the car when his phone buzzed, indicating an arrival of a new text message.
Xiah Junsu. Open now?
Sungmin clicked the yes button.
Err… thanks Sungmin-ah for your comments, I heard them from Hyukkie. Yyou are a really really cute friend, but I am not “HoSu” or in any other way related to Yunho, except he’s my best friend.
I love you too!!! Super Junior Hwaiting!!! Sungmin Hwaiting!!! \o/
(Btw, KyuMin is a really cute name ^o^)
Sungmin wanted to dig a hole in the ground and hide from the embarrassment.
~ || ~
“KIM HEE CHUL.” Kangin slammed the door to the 12th floor dorm.
“What is it, raccoon face?” Heechul hummed while he browsed an online catalogue, looking for a new bag.
“Down’s syndrome? Really now, you make up obsessed, cocky, arrogant bastard.” Kangin slammed the door to his room, his large hands still imprinted on the door.
“What? Go away, come back later.” Heechul motioned him away with his book. “Second thought, come here and tell me which one looks better. The red and black one or the blue and wh-”
“You bastard.” Kangin hissed in his face before he walked out of the door, slamming it behind his path.
“What’s his problem…” Heechul rolled his eyes as he turned back to the screen. “Red or Blue… ahhh where’s Hannie when you need him.”
Then it hit him like a truck. Taeyeon. We Got Married.
Oh shit…
~ || ~
“KyuKyuuu…” Sungmin whined on his bed. “Why are you ignoring me again?”
“Shut up hyung.”
“You know Seohyun came up to me and cried today because she heard people saying that she needed lessons with men?” Kyuhyun paused his game and whirled his chair around. He actually paused his game. “Do you want to know how bad I felt for her?”
“Errr… is she okay?”
“Sometimes the way you act… really pisses me off.” Kyuhyun murmured silently, his voice oozing with spite and poison.
“KyuKyuuuu…” Sungmin pouted his lips, holding his arms out for a hug.
“Shut up hyung. Go to bed.” Kyuhyun turned back around and plugged in his headphones, resuming his game.
Sungmin buried his face, or rather faceless face, into his pillow.
~ || ~
“Sungmin, did you rat out on me?”
“No… did you spill out what I said to other people?”
“Never, we had an agreement. Bitches' Delcaration. Thou shalt not backstab.”
“Then…” The two looked at each other. “Leeteuk.”
~ || ~
“Yeah can you believe it?” A spurt of high pitched laughter ensued. “They actually said that every man and woman would fall for him.”
“Like I mean T.O.P is hot, but..."
Heechul kicked open the door and stormed inside.
Leeteuk was sitting on a stool talking to Yuri and Tiffany. His hand was in mid air, pointing to the ceiling as if he was explaining something.
“Hello…” Yuri stifled a giggle, “Heechul-oppa and Sungmin-oppa.”
Tiffany burst into a fit of laughter as she rolled off the sofa onto the ground.
“What brings you two here?” Leeteuk arched an eyebrow at his two members. Heechul was obviously fuming, boiling over with rage. Sungmin just looked upset.
“Yah you!” Heechul charged forward and lifted up Leeteuk by the collar. “Why are you spilling our secrets out?”
Sungmin went over to help a paralyzed Tiffany sit up; all the while ignoring the glances Yuri would cast at him, her eyes twinkling with amusement.
“Yah you! What the fuck is this?”
“Well you can’t blame me.” Leeteuk pushed Heechul away. “Maybe this will teach you a lesson about what words you should say, and what words you must avoid.”
Heechul bit on the inside of his lip, suppressing his urge to throw out more of their brainstormed gossips about the other three people in the room. He motioned Sungmin to leave the dressing room, Tiffany’s laugh echoing inside the room as Leeteuk joined her, the high pitched squeals of his infamous laugh made Heechul’s blood boil.
“Minnie-ah!” Heechul turned around and pushed Sungmin against a wall, cornering the younger man. “You got my back, right?”
Sungmin nodded immediately.
“Excellent.” Heechul smiled deviously. He couldn’t wait until the new talk show, with all his power and fame in the industry, he already had an idea about what’s going to happen. He wasn't the famous Kim Heechul for no reason.
Interview questions where the guests do a live voting, results will be displayed and they will talk about it on the spot during the filming. Best part is, people can switch their votes and the graphs will change accordingly.
Heechul smiled again as Sungmin asked him if he was okay.
“I’m great, Minnie. Just great.” Heechul patted his head as the two walked down the hallway.
Pairing: N/A in this part. Might come into play later.
Genre: Crack. Fail!Humour
Summary: Bitches get bitten back, but Heechul has other plans up his sleeve.
A/N: After SNSD"s Oh! I got too high, so I whipped this up. I'm still high. Ahhh KwonYuri <333 Comments are much loved. It's going to get funner writing next part :D :D :D
“I’m not an airhead…” Donghae said quietly halfway through dinner. He put down his fork and looked at each and every member. “I can be a good father, and husband, and I will, I will love my kids.”
Heechul snorted, sending juice out of his nostrils while Sungmin looked like he was about to explode with laughter. Leeteuk glared at the two before they somehow managed to prevent themselves from dying on the spot.
“We will be happy and my kids will all call you uncle.” Yesung bit his bottom lip while Ryeowook busied himself with his rice bowl. Eunhyuk and Hankyung looked like they were about to cry. Siwon picked at a piece of vegetable on his plate, while Shindong continued draining the last drop of his grapefruit juice.
“Sungmin, we have to go out.” Heechul nudged him with his elbow, connecting his bony joint to his soft flesh. The two knew that once eye contact was made between them, it was all over.
Sungmin squirmed before he hastily pulled a jacket out of the closet as the two fumbled outside, their jackets half worn, their shoes barely even on their feet as the door slammed shut.
Leeteuk swore he heard the two laughing downstairs.
~ || ~
“LEE SUNGMIN.” Sunny screamed into his ear after their radio show just ended. She threw the red head phones onto the table, narrowly missing the laptop. “So I should act more mature now, ehh. So I should stop all this cuteness act, right?”
Sungmin swallowed with much difficulty. He already sensed that there was a different air to Sunny during their radio show.
“No… why would you say that.” Sungmin leaned in and motioned for a hug to end their collaboration. It had been a part of their weekly ritual.
“Get away from me.” Sunny stomped on his foot and walked out of the door without looking back.
“Sunny-ah…” Sungmin hopped his way out of the door, chasing after the girl. “Sunny-ah!!”
~ || ~
“Heechul-sshi?” Jokwon pulled him aside after filming Star King.
“Ah yes. Jo Kwon-sshi.” Heechul flashed a smile at the other man.
“You can take off your smile, it’s okay.” Jo Kwon said with a hint of bitterness. “I was wondering if we should… settle our misunderstandings?”
“What misunderstandings?” Heechul leaned against the wall. He despised being put on the spot like this.
Jo Kwon smiled at his awkwardness. “Oh, I’ve just been hearing some rather nasty comments about me…”
“So, you’re implying that I said them. Why Jo Kwon-sshi…”
“You can stop with the fakeness.” Jo Kwon smiled before he patted him on the head. “I think it’s best if we avoid each other. Let’s just keep this from the media, okay?”
“But… I…” Heechul stuttered as Jo Kwon headed down the hallway. “Chea~ Your face still needs some work.”
~ || ~
Sungmin was half asleep on the car when his phone buzzed, indicating an arrival of a new text message.
Xiah Junsu. Open now?
Sungmin clicked the yes button.
Err… thanks Sungmin-ah for your comments, I heard them from Hyukkie. Yyou are a really really cute friend, but I am not “HoSu” or in any other way related to Yunho, except he’s my best friend.
I love you too!!! Super Junior Hwaiting!!! Sungmin Hwaiting!!! \o/
(Btw, KyuMin is a really cute name ^o^)
Sungmin wanted to dig a hole in the ground and hide from the embarrassment.
~ || ~
“KIM HEE CHUL.” Kangin slammed the door to the 12th floor dorm.
“What is it, raccoon face?” Heechul hummed while he browsed an online catalogue, looking for a new bag.
“Down’s syndrome? Really now, you make up obsessed, cocky, arrogant bastard.” Kangin slammed the door to his room, his large hands still imprinted on the door.
“What? Go away, come back later.” Heechul motioned him away with his book. “Second thought, come here and tell me which one looks better. The red and black one or the blue and wh-”
“You bastard.” Kangin hissed in his face before he walked out of the door, slamming it behind his path.
“What’s his problem…” Heechul rolled his eyes as he turned back to the screen. “Red or Blue… ahhh where’s Hannie when you need him.”
Then it hit him like a truck. Taeyeon. We Got Married.
Oh shit…
~ || ~
“KyuKyuuu…” Sungmin whined on his bed. “Why are you ignoring me again?”
“Shut up hyung.”
“You know Seohyun came up to me and cried today because she heard people saying that she needed lessons with men?” Kyuhyun paused his game and whirled his chair around. He actually paused his game. “Do you want to know how bad I felt for her?”
“Errr… is she okay?”
“Sometimes the way you act… really pisses me off.” Kyuhyun murmured silently, his voice oozing with spite and poison.
“KyuKyuuuu…” Sungmin pouted his lips, holding his arms out for a hug.
“Shut up hyung. Go to bed.” Kyuhyun turned back around and plugged in his headphones, resuming his game.
Sungmin buried his face, or rather faceless face, into his pillow.
~ || ~
“Sungmin, did you rat out on me?”
“No… did you spill out what I said to other people?”
“Never, we had an agreement. Bitches' Delcaration. Thou shalt not backstab.”
“Then…” The two looked at each other. “Leeteuk.”
~ || ~
“Yeah can you believe it?” A spurt of high pitched laughter ensued. “They actually said that every man and woman would fall for him.”
“Like I mean T.O.P is hot, but..."
Heechul kicked open the door and stormed inside.
Leeteuk was sitting on a stool talking to Yuri and Tiffany. His hand was in mid air, pointing to the ceiling as if he was explaining something.
“Hello…” Yuri stifled a giggle, “Heechul-oppa and Sungmin-oppa.”
Tiffany burst into a fit of laughter as she rolled off the sofa onto the ground.
“What brings you two here?” Leeteuk arched an eyebrow at his two members. Heechul was obviously fuming, boiling over with rage. Sungmin just looked upset.
“Yah you!” Heechul charged forward and lifted up Leeteuk by the collar. “Why are you spilling our secrets out?”
Sungmin went over to help a paralyzed Tiffany sit up; all the while ignoring the glances Yuri would cast at him, her eyes twinkling with amusement.
“Yah you! What the fuck is this?”
“Well you can’t blame me.” Leeteuk pushed Heechul away. “Maybe this will teach you a lesson about what words you should say, and what words you must avoid.”
Heechul bit on the inside of his lip, suppressing his urge to throw out more of their brainstormed gossips about the other three people in the room. He motioned Sungmin to leave the dressing room, Tiffany’s laugh echoing inside the room as Leeteuk joined her, the high pitched squeals of his infamous laugh made Heechul’s blood boil.
“Minnie-ah!” Heechul turned around and pushed Sungmin against a wall, cornering the younger man. “You got my back, right?”
Sungmin nodded immediately.
“Excellent.” Heechul smiled deviously. He couldn’t wait until the new talk show, with all his power and fame in the industry, he already had an idea about what’s going to happen. He wasn't the famous Kim Heechul for no reason.
Interview questions where the guests do a live voting, results will be displayed and they will talk about it on the spot during the filming. Best part is, people can switch their votes and the graphs will change accordingly.
Heechul smiled again as Sungmin asked him if he was okay.
“I’m great, Minnie. Just great.” Heechul patted his head as the two walked down the hallway.