(Untitled)

Jan 21, 2006 20:16

Can someone explain to me what it feels like to be intimidated? I mean, I think I have some idea what the word means, but I don't think I can empathize with this state, I have no real grasp of it.

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Comments 26

oikade January 22 2006, 04:49:05 UTC
I don't know, but I'd be embarassed to ask that question.

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dangerzooey January 22 2006, 19:19:01 UTC
Why?

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oikade January 22 2006, 19:40:58 UTC
That's one of those questions that my mind guesses would be so labourous to answer, and potentially unproductive - that I'd rather just cringe inside for a moment and hope you eventually figure it out on your own.

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dangerzooey January 22 2006, 19:43:03 UTC
Hmm...curious.

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dangerzooey January 22 2006, 19:20:52 UTC
Well then, Lane, is there some experiment/situation you can outline for me such that if I were to go through it, I might be likely to acquire such an experience?

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dangerzooey January 23 2006, 06:16:00 UTC
Not on the basis of that fear, no.

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unkunvinst January 22 2006, 06:25:05 UTC
Hmmmm, I would go with: the queasy feeling that comes when someone impresses upon you that they are a great deal better (stronger, smarter, more knowledgable, etc.) than you, and then you feel inadequate and weak. This term especially applies to situations in which one person is attempting to make this impression on someone in order to prevent them from doing something. For example, Aaron is about to attack Beth, when Carl steps in and threatens dude Aaron with a great deal of bodily harm if he continues attempting to harm Beth. Because Carl looks genuinely a great deal stronger than him. So, he hightails it outta there. Aaron has been successfully intimidated, in this case for an apparently good cause.

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dangerzooey January 22 2006, 19:22:59 UTC
So then, it seems, intimidation is itself just a form of fear? Or is it in some way importantly different?

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unkunvinst January 23 2006, 06:08:18 UTC
It's fear, yes, but specifically the kind that comes in two types of situations: when someone else tries to make you fearful, and it works (example mentioned earlier); or, when someone else is just so incredibly impressive that it makes you feel bad about your own qualifications. For example, if you work in a competitive business and are up for the same promotion as someone else, and end up shying away from the opportunity because you don't think that you can get it. Whether or not the other person meant to quash your hope, you have been intimidated by their abilities or professionalism.

Or, I've heard it said that, say one person is interested in someone else, but they are scared to ask that person out do too feeling like the object of their fascination is too good for them (too good looking, too smart, too sexy, too charming, whatever).

Basically, when someone impresses upon on that, in some way, they are better than you are, that is intimidation.

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:p kiki_tea January 22 2006, 08:54:34 UTC
Kevin. I swear to God.

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Re: :p dangerzooey January 22 2006, 19:23:14 UTC
What'd I do?

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ninja_style January 22 2006, 14:57:42 UTC
Intimidation can actually be a valuable survival skill, so I'd say you're missing out.

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dangerzooey January 22 2006, 19:23:39 UTC
Help me learn it.

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Are you serious? kiki_tea January 24 2006, 05:34:22 UTC
Kev. I'll kick your ass the next time I see you. Hopefully this threat is enough to intimidate you, because you know I'll do it.

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Re: Are you serious? dangerzooey January 24 2006, 05:37:43 UTC
No offense, sweetie, but I'm like three times as big as you. You'd better get someone else to do it for you. Of course, I'm fairly certain that physical harm (or the threat thereof) is insufficient to intimidate me. I learned how to deal with that quite well in my early life.

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