A Void
During the course of last night I got into three seperate shouting matches with my girlfriend (with heavy liplocked make-up sessions shortly after), played poker, didn't lose very much money at all, got nice and tipsy, smoked several cigarettes, then crashed at my office with my girl in my arms, and cats laying on top of us. Every time I sleep at my office, the two cats make me their mattress. If I adopt the cats when my company moves in a few weeks, I'll find myself like Selina Kyle at night, cats all over me. Anyways. There's so much intensity and insanity between my girl and I... I have the feeling we're the only two people who can deal with one another intimately at this point in time. The parallels between us make it easy to communicate to each other, even though on several levels we don't want to communicate about the very things we need to. She said to me, "I am insanely impressed by you on various levels. Like EVERY levels. And there are a lot of levels. Kind of like that Nintendo game with the fish and the bubbles and there are like 101 board-things, plus bonus levels, and you can only get to them with a secret code from a Japanese book. That's how many levels you impress me on." She likened me to Bubble Bobble (video games existed before 1994, you philistines). So, it was a heavy night, a good night, and yeah I fell off the nicotine wagon but I'm right back on again. It's a process. And I'm saving quite a bit of money in the meantime, anyway.
Stayed off the Kosmic Kola today, and I'm fine, but still unfocused. Spent a lot of time just fucking around at work. It's not as if I don't do work; when it comes up, I do. But I have a lot of time during the day when I can accomplish other things, but instead find myself filling it by just wasting time. I have the Daredevil/Jester story that's possibly stillborn (but still workable), and the Superman origin retcon I now have in mind ("Communion" is the working title), I could've been doing that. Instead I did shit. Argh.