Acting - fic, gen
Title: Acting
Author: tigriswolf
Disclaimer: Not my characters. Just for fun.
Warnings: sometime during season 2
Pairings: none
Wordcount: 470
Rating: PG-13
You are what you are and you do not apologize for that. You do not make excuses or pretend otherwise; the face you present to the world, to the Jam Pony workers, to the strangers you pass on the street-it is a mask, yes. But to those who know what you are, what you used to be, what you used to do-you do not act for them.
You do not play the game she plays. You never hide what you are.
She is angry at you for that. And jealous.
And a little frightened.
You do not fit in a small box; you cannot be written off or shunted into a corner. She cannot plan for you or prepare for you, cannot predict what you will do.
You have power over her because of that, more than anyone else she knows. She pretends she isn’t more, isn’t better; you don’t. She’s tried to turn her back on the knowledge in her blood, tried to turn away from training and memories that haunt her sleep; you never have.
You are what you are and you will never apologize for that. You will not make excuses for something you did not cause, something you did not want, something you had no part in and could not help.
You are a predator, a soldier, a killer-bred, born, and raised. You are danger, a liar, an actor. You are the training in your blood, the pain in your past, the killing lust that wells up when you are angry or hurt. You are a panther disguised as a kitten, a hurricane hidden as a light spring rain.
You do not hide the predator within; the world does that for you, happily. You are beautiful, and beautiful people are written off easily.
You would have thought she’d really see you, since you never truly hide.
But ten years outside has dulled her. You are the best you’ve ever been.
And she never wonders how she always wins, though she should. She never pauses to think, to remember-she sees Ben, Manticore, her failures… but never you.
You won’t bother to tell her. It’d be a waste of time, of breath. So you smile and smirk and do the expected. You are not hiding, not pretending, but they’ll see what they want.
And if it gives you an advantage, well…
Max should know better. You are what you are and you will not apologize. You will not pretend to be anything else.
And if she’s thrown off a little, if she feels a thrill of fear she can’t explain-she’s right to.
Too bad(for her) that she’ll shake it off and go about her life.
She’s forgotten to be 452. You’ve never forgotten to be 494.
Perhaps madness is inherent in your blood.