Sleep with all your lights on.
I meet the MOST amazing people while they're in relationships really.
Back in high school, I had this humongous thing for a girl named Erica. She was seeing an acquaintance of mine when I met her. We had spoken casually, and one day, she needed help. One of her friends in Coquitlam was getting slapped around, and needed some help. Me, her and another friend of ours immediately stood up and went out to help this girl.
She wasn't home.
As a result, the three of us walked for hours and hours along the highway home. It felt like forever... she spent the entire time apologizing to the two of us.
But from that point on, she treated me differently, like a confidant...that somehow I was different from the others. I had integrity. I was her knight in shining armor, she called me as much.
But she was in a relationship, ( with someone who SAT THERE when she was relaying the story about her friend... which in the long run, seemed wise, and neutral... but all we were doing was helping her move. I suspect he was just lazy.) and I just stepped back. I became her go to guy for advise... the phonecalls were a staple of my day...I would get home from school, and my phone would ring. And I would spend hours and hours explaining men to her... keeping myself seperate from the equation.
There were points, where in hindsight, she was expecting me to make a move... kind of daring me to step up, so she'd have an excuse to leave him...maybe it's my ego looking behind me too eagerly... I dunno.
I never took the bait... I couldn't. It would make me a terrible person. I've been through too much of this crap to walk through a breach like that...but it ate at me... horribly. Everyday I would hear about the horrible things he said, or did, and I would have to say things like...
"You're a smart girl... you know what to do..."
"Things like this will persist...it's up to you to make that difference..."
"It's not your fault... there's nothing wrong with you."
Nothing even remotely derogatory about the other person. Never ever. Doing that would turn me into that guy... y'know...
That guy.
The one who is talking to your girlfriend/wife right now. Because they don't matter. Only he matters.
"You shouldn't put up with him..." That guy says... "You can do better... me for instance... hey...my Al Camino is just parked around back..."
I fucking hate that guy.