Fic: Elizabeth - Chapter 1 (1/1)
Tommy storms into the rehearsal room, shouting apologies along the way. “I´m so sorry guys. Fucking cops stopped me for a full check. Alcohol, drugs, everything. By the time they let me go, traffic was crazy, and it took me forever to get here.”
Throughout his whole monologue, Tommy doesn´t realize that his friends and bandmates are just sitting around, doing nothing - literally. When it hits him that everyone is staring at him, he quizzically asks, slowly catching his breath,
“What´s going on guys? Why are you just sitting around? I mean, I´m sure you can rehearse without a guitar--”
When Brian just raises eyebrow Tommy stops. “What?!”
Brian just looks at him in disbelief. “Of course we can, but we can´t exactly do anything without a singer!”
Tommy finally realizes that Adam isn't there. ”So where is he? In traffic too?”
When nobody say anything, he doesn´t know why, but he starts to feel strange. Brian speaks up again. “We don´t know … we … ummmm …”
What do you mean by 'ummm'?”
“I mean …” Brian hesitates. “We … we kinda thought you were together, since you´ve been spending lot of time together since his breakup …”
When Tommy shoots him a glance he adds, “What? It´s true …!”
“Maybe, but the way you said that, it sounded like you were implying we have something secret going on!”
When Ashley starts defending Brian, Tommy insists vehemently,
“We´re not having an affair! Understood?”
“Understood. Geez Tommy calm down. So I guess you don´t know where Adam is either?”
“No I don´t know. You didn´t try to call him?”
“Erm...” Ashley starts. “Like we told you, we thought you two were together so we kinda didn´t want to disturb.”
“Fine, enough of that! But it´s strange. It´s not like Adam at all. I´m gonna call him.” Tommy turns his back to his friends, and speed dials Adam´s numbers. Tommy lets it ring for a long time, murmuring silently “Come on Adam, pick up. Pick up,” but when Adam doesn't answer, he turns back to his friends.
“He always picks up my calls. I´m going to check on him, see if everything is okay. We were supposed to go to dinner after the rehearsal and … “
Tommy realizes that his friends are staring at him: “What …?”
“Nothing,” comes the chorus answer. Tommy just rolls his eyes and leaves.
After he's gone, Ashley asks Brian: “Do you think they will ever figure it out?”
“Before they get hurt? Who knows Ash, who knows.” and with that they head out.
At Adam´s place, Adam is sitting on his couch, watching the fire in his designer fireplace. He's wrapped in a soft pink blanket he bought for his little Elizabeth, thinking about that morning. He is famous, he is rich, he is a rockstar. And despite what he is and what he has, he´s about to lose everything he wants from life, because he can´t keep his promises.
His thoughts travel back to that morning, to the appointment that he fears may have cost him Elizabeth.
“Adam, welcome.” Mrs. Potter, or Jane as she invited Adam to address her, welcomes him to her office, and if she´s surprised that he came alone, she doesn´t let it show. He knows the conversation they are about to have will not be easy, but he tries to look calm, even though inside, he´s frightened to the bone.
“Take a seat please, do you want anything? Coffee, tea, water?”
“No thank you. So you wanted to see me again, Jane?” Adam asks.
“Yes. I know this will not be a pleasant conversation, but we have to have it. When you decided to adopt Elizabeth, you knew what conditions there were to fulfill. And speaking of obligations, weren´t you supposed to come with your fiancé today?”
Suddenly Adam senses that she seems to be a little upset. “Yes but…” Adam takes a deep breath, trying to sound convincing, “… he had a last-minute gig with his friend´s band and he couldn´t miss the rehearsal.”
“Adam, I´m going to be totally honest with you. You are an amazing man with a big, loving heart, but with this kind of postponement, you are going to lose Elizabeth.”
Adam inhales sharply: “What… what do you mean by that?”
“I mean that it really seems like you are hesitant to introduce your fiancé...”
“I´m not...” Adam starts to say but Jane interrupts him gently.
“Don´t interrupt please. I know you said you are both very busy, that your partner is still shy with the media, and that you want privacy from the world of media and fans. And believe me I understand that, but you have to understand, that if you don't take a risk to come here with your partner to see Amy, your adoption can´t proceed.”
Adam is shocked but tries to stay and look calm, even when he´s facing the possibility he prayed would never come. As he fights tears and tries to stay strong Jane continues. “Let me ask you one thing. Do you really, really want Elizabeth to be your daughter?”
You know I do, Jane. With everything in me.”
“Then you have to take the final step Adam. Even though it could cost you your privacy and could compromise the adoption as well. There is no other way. We both know Amy doesn´t have much time. She likes you very much, but if she´s not sure her condition will be met, she will not sign the papers.”
Adam feels his life burning down to ashes, and he can´t fight the tears that are pooling in his eyes any longer. Jane sees his discomfort and rushes to calm him.
“Calm down Adam, no need to panic. It´s not too late yet. I talked to Amy and we have agreed that this is a special situation, with your celebrity and the fame that surrounds you, so we have decided on the following. Sometime during the next few weeks, I will come to your home for an unannounced visit. You can introduce me to your partner in the privacy of your own home. I´m sure you and your fiancé will feel more comfortable. We can talk more and I can get to know your partner more, and we can even use this visit as a mandatory house check. So what you think?” Jane looks satisfied with how she solved the problem, so Adam tries to pretend and gives her a fake smile.
“It´s great, thank you. We will be waiting.”
And with that Jane dismisses him with a smile and a handshake.
On his way home he thinks about how he got here, into this crazy situation. He thinks about how he never thought that one day, his life would be full of lies and pretending. And about how he hates liars and how every lie will come to light.
When Tommy gets to Adam´s house, he rings the bell a few times and when there is no answer, he lets himself in with a key Adam gave him many months ago. When he goes inside, everything is calm and quiet so he calls Adam´s name. When he gets no answer, he goes to check the living room.
He sees Adam lying on his couch, wrapped in a pink blanket. He gets closer and see lots of pictures of Elizabeth on the floor, on the coffee table, and one in Adam´s hand, tightly clamped to his chest in his sleep. Tommy watches Adam´s face and sees his smudged eyeliner and he knows something is wrong.
He gently strokes Adam´s hair and brushes his fingers over Adam's forehead before sitting next to him on the floor, shaking him gently. “Adam, Adam wake up.”
Adam slowly wakes up and his eyes widen in surprise to see Tommy sitting next to him. ”Tommy? What are you doing here?”
“What am I doing here? Adam, do you know what time is? You missed the rehearsal and you weren´t picking up your phone so I came to see if everything was okay.”
“Oh my god, I´m so sorry Tommy…” Adam sits up and starts to apologize. “…I had to nap, I had a really busy, tough morning and I must have fallen asleep. I´m just… sorry.”
“It´s okay Adam. It's okay but tell me what´s wrong?”
“Wrong? Why do you think something is wrong?” Adam doesn´t look at Tommy, just down at his hands.
Tommy gently reaches out and brushes away the smudged eyeliner from under his eyes and smiles sadly. ”No. Don´t do that Adam. Don´t lie to me. We´ve been through so much shit together you know you don´t have to lie to me.”
Tommy moves from the floor, sits on the other side of the small couch and pull his legs up to his chest, mirroring Adam´s position. “Look at me Adam. Look at me and tell me what´s wrong.”
Adam takes a deep breath and starts to explain. “I´m going to lose everything. I´m going to lose Elizabeth.”
“But why? You're the perfect candidate, you are loving and you have a nice home and money...”
“But I don´t have a partner, a fiancé,” Adam says brokenly, his eyes starting to water again.
“What do you mean you don´t have a fiancé? You don´t need a partner to adopt, I´m sure of that.”
“That's usually the case, true, but not in this case.” Adam sighs deeply. “All those months ago, when we …” Adam chokes on the ´we´, but continues, “…when we have decided to adopt a baby, I found Elizabeth and her mother Amy. She was pregnant back then. Pregnant and alone and one day at her checkup, that was before we met her, she found out she´s terminally ill. She laid out a few obligations that have to be met, in addition to the usual contract for the adopting parent. One was that it doesn´t matter when she signs the adoption papers, she´ll be allowed to stay with her daughter until her last day. The second was that her daughter must be adopted by a couple. It was no problem then but as you can see, it´s a problem now.”
Adam looks so sad explaining the situation, but Tommy just doesn´t get it. “But how can you adopt her, you've been single for five or six months now.”
“I ….” Adam looks away in shame and fear of judgment, making him blush.
“Adam? What did you do?” Tommy asks. When Adam doesn't react, Tommy moves closer to Adam, nodding his head encouragingly: “Tell me. What have you done?”
Adam finally looks at him, tears running down his face. He takes a few deep breaths to calm himself and continues. “I lied. After our break up, when Amy, that´s Elizabeth´s mom, said that her baby can´t be adopted by a single parent and that she heard me and my partner broke up, I told her the first thing that came to my mind. That we had problems, and as I spent more and more time with my best friend, we fell in love. I asked her not to tell anybody as we have had to keep our relationship in private for some time, because of the media and things like that. She was really doubtful at first, but then she believed my story. I told it to my social worker Jane a little bit later and everything was fine for some time. I was always careful not to invite her over, always had some excuse for me to come to her office. I thought that maybe when Amy got to know me more, she would cancel the “couple” condition but that´s not gonna happen. More and more now, they are both asking to meet my partner, the one who doesn´t exist...“
Adam´s voice breaks and he just doesn´t know what more there is to say. Everything is out, all his hopes, fears, lies… He doesn´t even dare to look at Tommy right then because the silence that fills the room is proof that his best friend is disgusted by him.
Tommy looks at him in total disbelief. He can´t hide the shock and disappointment in his voice, but he needs an answer, wants to know why. “Oh my god, Adam. You made up so many lies. How could you do that? Every lie will come out you have to know that! It will ruin everything you worked for. Look at me.”
When nothing happens Tommy repeats himself, sounding more firmly. “Look at me! Tell me why you told all these lies, you hate liars. Why risk everything? Everything!”
Adam is surprised by Tommy´s anger, but at the same time, maybe he´s not because he, too, knows it´s all wrong. “Because She is worth it, she is worth the risk. I know you've only seen her in pictures, but in reality, she´s my angel Tommy. She´s beautiful and precious and she´s all I want from life now. I´m living my dreams on stage and in the studio, but thanks to her, now I know another kind of connection, and I want to have that kind of love in my life, Tommy. She´s not just some distraction to make me forget him. I can´t imagine anything I want to have more in my life.”
Adam can´t control his emotions any longer and starts sobbing, again looking away All the shame making it very difficult to look at Tommy: “Pl… please don´t hate m…me, please. I… I know it´s all wr…. wrong. I just di.. didn´t know what to do …”
“I don´t hate you. I really don´t, but I´m so disappointed …“
Adam interrupts him with a silent “I know” but Tommy shushes him.
“Don´t interrupt me. I´m so disappointed you didn't tell me sooner. We´re best friends. I wouldn´t judge you. Yell at you and maybe, call you crazy but I could never judge or hate you so why?”
Adam looks at him, blushing hot as hell. “I couldn´t tell you. I wanted to, so many times but I couldn´t.”
“Why? Why couldn´t you Adam!”
“Because I was embarrassed, okay? I used you. Are you happy now that you know?” Adam all but yells but apologizes quickly. “I´m sorry I didn´t mean to yell at you, sorry.”
Tommy looks at him perplexed: “What… what do you mean you used me, used my name?”
“You were the first person that popped into my head. So I told them you are my fiancé. It was easy to believe Sauli was jealous because of the stage antics and we´re pretty close so…”
“Okay, I got it, bud you do realize that if you had told me sooner, we would not be in this deep shit …”
Adam looks utterly surprised by Tommy´s statement: “Wha … what you mean by that?”
Tommy looks like a bolt of energy hit him when he answers, “What you think? I´m gonna help you!”
Tears are uncontrollably running down his face and he can´t stop shaking with sobs: “You´re… you´re gonna…. Help me?”
“Yes I am going to and you will stop that crying jag right now!”
“But ….”
“But nothing. You fucked up, badly. But we will make it together. I may be pissed you didn't tell me, but I will be damned if you will lose your baby girl. We have to make the perfect happy couple in a really short time so you will pay a visit to the bathroom and you will pull yourself together, because you look tired and your hair is a mess and I´m not even gonna start about your face. So hush hush, off you go.”
All that energy that´s filling the living room, literally gushing from Tommy´s every word and gesture lets Adam feel more alive, lets him feel hopeful, and he just pounces on Tommy, hugs him tightly, whispering, “Thank you, you are the best friend ever”.
Tommy kisses his neck lightly, gently biting the same spot, hearing a low moan escape Adam´s lips: “I know I am, now go.” Adam reluctantly lets go and heads for the bathroom.
As he leaves, he hears Tommy talking to him: “We´ll need a lot of help from our friends and families if what I have in mind will work, be prepare for lot of explaining.”
“I will be ready when the time comes!” And with that he disappears.
Tommy goes to Adam´s kitchen and takes a beer from a fridge; he also makes a tea for Adam. He takes it back to the living room, sits on the floor by the coffee table, takes some paper and a pen from underneath the table, and starts to think of a list of people they have to call and what they want from them, thinking how crazy this will be, but he also thinks that Adam and his happiness is worth it.
