This strange desire to type to the world
I want to walk away from all social media, but I feel inexplicably linked to it, like I will lose all connection with other humans if I do.
I’ve been typing my thoughts out into the world in one form or another for nearly 20 years now, and the idea of not doing so feels uncomfortable. But doing so has begun to feel narcissistic or needy, at the same time. I often ponder why it is that we post things to the internet. Do we now require the input of others to feel validated in our thoughts? And what effect does this constant exposure of our inner workings have on our relationships with others and how others see themselves? How much do people feel they know us based solely upon the things we post on social media? How real are these posts when compared to our actual lives? Are we damaging ourselves by reading the posts of others and playing the damned but inevitable comparison game?
Yet here I am, returning now once again to my vice of so many years. A place where I made and destroyed so many friendships, and a place where I put the ignorance of the world that I embodied in my early 20s on full display, with no concept that I was still quite a child.
I now fully understand that I know nothing, and that there are no universal truths. I strive daily to comprehend and see from the perspectives of others, and to find a way to keep my own brain chemicals in check.