all thats fine.. i just dont wanna lose a friend.. i dont need to talk to you on the phone or anything .. i justwanna be able to say hi and see how things are going ... like an occasional check up... i mean i dont want things to be how they were either..there was to much drama.. i just wanna be able to carry a conversation and be descent to one another.. i mean life is going really well for me im loving school i feel liek EVERYDAY i have something to wake up too and i love that and you arent in my head everysecond anymore.. but i would love you go to richards and the movies and be like hey hows it going with jake.. and the family and all that cause i care.. but i dont need to hold your hand look in your eyes .. or any of that.. all that is over.. and its GREAT i just wanna friend.. so whatta ya say?
Well I still think we NEED to talk. I was hoping for some sort of explanation I guess on why you feel you need to lie to me so much..? I deserve that I think..? I'll go to the movies still and Richard's like I planned on, and be completely civil if you're there, but I can tell you right now that it'll be fake. That smile that I'll have when I ask how you're doing.. It's not real. Because deep down, I don't really care how you're doing, as mean as it sounds. I'm still too mad to even consider a future for us as ANYTHING right now. Megan said she can't really hold a grudge and that life's too short to stay mad at someone, but since you 'know me so well' maybe you'll remember that I'm not like that. And if you mess up with me, it takes time to get my trust back. I just really don't think I can sit there and listen to how you feel or what's going on in your life when I have absolutely NO idea if it's even true or not. I'm glad things are going well for you though, and I heard you're doing better. I'm not gonna give my opinion on how I
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well im saying sorry... i really am.. and the only reason i lied so i could look cool.. and becuase me and megan agreed to becuase we didnt wanna hurt you.. yeaj i take it back .. i cant believe i was ashamed to let my best friend know that i liked someone besides her.. i dunno why honestly i didnt mean for anyone to get hurt.. .. all i wanna do is be able to say hi to a girl that used to be my everything.. i just wanna have somewhat of a relationship with the girl i planned my life out with.. what if i see you somewhere like im on a date or somethin.. i would love to introduce her to you and i would love to say this is mary tanner.. my best friend.. my friend my something.. i dunno i dont have really anything else to say except .. hi and i wanna hear about you and jake and things and i wanna tell you about some thingsof my own too.. i think youll be proud of me..
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