Flirting at His Workplace

[silver_test]

Comments

[miio_miio]

Love shouldn't have any boundaries, why would you not flirt with the barista? Cute story.

I'd say ask him out, you could write a note on the receipt? Or write a little card which you give as you pay. I'd say take a risk, you never know until you try. ^^

[silver_test]

Thank you for the note idea! That sounds like a safer way to go about thing's if it would allow us to talk outside work. And then I guess I'd know his feelings if he didn't respond...

[miio_miio]

Let us know how things went ^^

[silver_test]

I've been into the cafe a couple more times since I posted. My friend was there the first time and said 'look back at him! cause he keeps looking at you!!' so either he's totally creeped out, likes my friend, or likes me, lol.
The second time he was at the till beside mine, and leaned over to start a conversation with me (kinda neglecting his own poor customer in the process). So I think I really gotta do something because at the very least I think I'll have a friend out of this, and maybe even a date.
I keep saying I'll give him a note with my # 'next time I go in there' and then it's always seems so busy.

[lupinlover]

I was in a similar situation once. A barista at a place I always went to seemed to be into me and he started showing up in the mornings when he didn't work and hanging out because he knew I'd be coming in in the mornings, too. (I went once in the mornings and once at lunch). Turned out to be a married creep... but I guess my point is, trust your instincts. If you think this guy is into you, I'm guessing he might be. So, ask him out! I know it's hard when other people are around, but there has to be a moment when you can talk to him alone. All you really need to do is ask him if he wants to hang out sometime. You could even have your number written out on a piece of paper before hand so you can slip it to him if he says yes. Easy, simple, and quick.

Good luck!

[silver_test]

Ugh wow. Did no one else at his job notice this situation? Or I guess they thought it was none of their business to tip you off about him? But yikes, eek. So when you say trust your instincts, I'm guessing maybe you got a creepy vibe right off the bat from that barista?
In my situation I'm terrible at noticing if people are attracted or into me. But in this case I feel like there's something there, like this weird mutual spark where we meet eyes and can't help but grin at each other.
I've been thinking that yah, maybe asking him to hang out and get caught up on a show we like could be a safe bet?
Yes, I'm liking this note idea, thank you!

[goldfoil]

I think it would be more appropriate to be to the point - so ask him out and then back off immediately if he doesn't seem overtly interested. He's at work, you're a customer. Flirting (and even asking him out while he's working) put him in an awful position if he's not interested - you don't know what his workplace culture is like and you don't know if he can reasonably turn you down and set his desired boundaries while also doing the whole excellent customer service thing. He needs his job and he needs to not be made uncomfortable from strangers making passes at him while he's just trying to do his job yanno?

[silver_test]

Thank you. So yah, if I do give him my number I'd I'll leave right away, and try not to be a total creeper. I do see what you mean about boundaries and work culture and such. This guy seems sincere when he talks, but, I don't know him, and as you say I don't know his workplace culture and what kind of expectations there are for or boundaries he can set. But I did hear his female coworker telling a guy who seemed eager to chat that 'oh I've been out with my boyfriend on the weekend' and the guy seemed to lose interest in their convo. So it does seem like that kind of hint that 'i'm taken' being used as a brush off is okay at their work...
But yah, I agree I don't want to make him totally uncomfortable because he could very well just being kind because he's a good person and he works in customer service. Just like I work in admin and am polite and kind to customers on the phone who are giving me their life stories, when all I want to do is move on to the next customer... :)

[silver_test]

Thank you! I do like it too because it saves time in busy lines up (oh hey, want to catch up on that show we both like? *hands note over and flees*) and because yah, it gives more privacy. Plus as you noted it's foolproof; if he calls yay he at the very least wants to be friends, and if he doesn't then I know how he feels...

[jeunelis]

I once did that, and he texted me to say that he had a boyfriend :) but it was not awkward when I went back in. At least then you know.

[silver_test]

That's so good to hear that it wasn't awkward when you went in again!! Cause I wouldn't want to lose this place. But if I totally chicken out, I'm in the process of potentially getting another job in a totally different neighbourhood, so then I could always ask him right before I leave my current job and then no risk at all of embarrassment next time. (I'm such a chicken and I do feel bad about it being his workplace and not wanting to do anything to get him in trouble there. though since he's the one initiating things with me I guess it's partially up to him to stop and not get in trouble; like if I'm at someone else's till he doesn't have to come over and talk to me)