inherent

[daveespionage]

Its this thing where
I try to get people to like me
By tailoring what I'm saying and
How I say it
To fit their reactions

And I wonder why
Afterwards
I feel like I've put myself in
A box 
That isn't shaped like me.

Its how I feel when I have to play songs 
That I absolutely
Can't stand
Because its what
The person in front of me will dance to.

Wallow in my own 

Comments

[maevemacaraab]

When I was a kid, I was afraid of stuffed animals. I imagined that they would wake up while I was sleeping and nibble on my hair and skin, and try to pluck my eyes out. I got so scared that I locked them all in a closet....and subsequently, I started to collect rocks because even the crazy kids need friends. I named all mine and slept with them. Even today, especially in the winter, I line my rocks on the radiator and go to bed with them.

I think it can be a hard thing being a weird kid grown up. There's still this sense that everyone is staring at you, whispering behind your back, talking about how strange you are.

I bet the Bear is your totem. If you were born 1000 years ago, you would be a great shaman...your bedroom would be a temple where you would commune with the spirits of the bear. You would wear furs and take mushrooms and rove the forest as a wild animal....and come back to tell the villagers great bear wisdom...the knowledge of tooth and claw...

[daveespionage]

I thought plants would do that when I was a kid.

Bears have pretty much been the thing that makes sense to me. Hibernating in the winter, wandering around all summer eating salmon, crab, eel, and tourists.

Its part of the reason I get along with cats. Its possible to curl up with a cat and not feel like I'm not with something that doesn't get me.

I get that sometimes with dogs. Not usually though. Usually dogs and I get along in the way that children and I get along. They poke me, I make a noise and pat them on the head.