Smallville Eppy Recaps:
What I Loved
~Clark (to Tess): ”Luthor blood is Luthor blood, it’s poison”. “They’re dangerous Tess; they’re born that way.”
Cry moar, Clark. Cry moar. Clark ignoring the advice imparted on him by Brainiac 5 in “Homecoming” (stop being such a Judgey Judge Judy) would rankle if Clark’s warnings to Tess had more heat behind it. Instead, he sounds like anyone who’s talking about an ex. No matter what good the ex has done in the past, no matter how loved they were, it doesn’t matter. It’s all about the present.
Clark: “They’re dangerous, Tess. They’re born that way.” Lex killed a man, Tess. Did you know that? He killed a man named Roger Nixon. He was trying to kill my dad and Lex shot and killed him!
Tess: In other words Lex saved your dad’s life?
Clark: But killed someone in the process. Don’t bury the headline.
No matter how Clark tries to point out the evils of Lex’s way (which, let’s be honest, is valid no matter what brought about his descent) it just sounds like, “Waahhh, he disappointed me and I gave him my body and my heart!”
~The twist that in this alternate Earth it was Oliver and not Lionel who ruined the community in Smallville with his mining for Kryptonite. This process is apparently so destructive that it destroys the economies of both Smallville and Metropolis, plunging the two cities back to New York in the 20s. I half expected a bunch of newsboys to break out into song.
Clotheslines in the city? Were there long lines at soup kitchens where they served boiled cabbage too?
What’s even worse? Lois has newscaster hair.
~I may not like Kelly Souders as a showrunner, but damn if she has a keen eye as a director. She knows how to frame Tom just right.
I loved the direction of the fight scene. It really seemed as if there was a real battle waging. I love the stunt of sliding across the floor and I especially loved the sequences of Lionel running for the portal and Clark materializing just as Lois, Tess and Oliver draw their weapons on him.
Clark Luthor
~Clark Luthor and Tess melting my TV.
Tess: “That’s the great thing about us being on our own: you can have lunch whenever you want.”
Clark: “What if I told you I was hungry now.”
My friends and I have a running joke where we call oral sex “box lunch”. And yeah, the entire Clark/Tess exchange is innuendo for sex, but all I’m thinking is “Tom’s talking about going down on someone!”
Tom plays bad so well. It never gets old seeing him show his versatility. In the years that Tom has had to play dark he’s always been able to avoid playing it in a stock way. Red K Clark is at once petulant, willful and hurting (wanting what he wants when he wants it-even if that means trying to take Lana from her engagement party--; raging at his parents because he feels he wasn’t loved like a biological child); Kal-El is devoid of emotion; he’s about results-even if it means knocking Martha down to fly after Lex’s jet. Clark Luthor is a sociopath (though I didn’t like how he kept fiddling with his ring, that’s a trick he did to get into character with Red K Clark. It made sense then-to emphasize what was driving Clark, but to use it again borders on hamminess).
Clark Luthor is so deliciously warped. I should not get turned on by someone bemoaning the fact that he didn’t have a chance to get blood on his hands! The way his voice and eyes went hard when he said that…
Why so hot, murderous Clark Luthor?
Even Superman’s turned on
Only Prince and Clark Luthor could pull off paisley
When he yelled at Tess to stand up, I’m sure she didn’t know whether to stand or lie down and let him have her way with her.
Cassidy and Tom were crazy hot together (hell, Cassidy looked hot as Earth Two Tess).
I also enjoyed seeing Clark play both roles because when confronted with Lionel, Clark reverted to early season Clark. He was so tentative and unsure and small when he found Lionel at the Fortress. It was if he was caught and so sure Lionel was seeing through him. I haven't seen that Clark in years.
~The show wisely introducing the concept of the multiverse to the show. This is a great way to shut down people like myself who are quick to say, “But that’s not what happens in the comics!” “Smallville” is it’s own universe---I like to think of it as Earth 69. It’s the parallel universe where Lex didn’t kill his father for insurance money in which he built his wealth, an Earth where Lex had an illicit affair with underaged Clark Kent, where Clark was engaged to Lois before he became Superman, where Kid Flash and Cyborg were founding members of the JLA, where Martha would like to Clark to say she was going to the Farmer’s Market but was really having sex at the mansion with Lionel in Lex’s bed and an Earth where where Oliver entered into a dom/sub relationship with Rick Flag.
I wonder if they can get in an episode set on Earth 26 before it ends.
What I Didn’t Love
Lionel Luthor
Or rather the Luthors and the seeming importance placed on them in this the final season.
I am all for bringing back as many familiar faces in this final season. It’s only right and proper to see those who have been with Clark as he’s made his journey. But “see” is not the same as “focus too much on and take away precious Clark time”.
There’s a difference between want and need. The writers want to address the Clark and Lex dynamic in this final season, but does this season need it? My personal view is that it doesn’t.
In S8 when they took the legend of Naman and Segeth and applied it to Clark and Doomsday, the writers played down, if not downright erased, the notion of the Lex’s journey being important to Clark’s. Lex story simply became another origins story.
While I think it’s important that there’s a footnote to Clark and Lex’s relationship we don’t necessarily need Lex present for that ( especially seeing that it’s highly doubtful that Rosenbaum will return). It doesn’t even take a full episode to acknowledge it. Thanks to Tess being a Luthor Clark can now have someone to discuss his relationship with Lex. I was hoping that Clark and Tess’ final scene would be him telling her that Lex wasn’t always a bad guy (While I am a avid Clex-er, I am honest about the reality of Clark and Lex’s relationship. Yes, Lex has been a friend and has done some great things for Clark, his friends and family, but those good deeds don’t negate the bad Lex has done and is capable of doing).
The final scene between Tess and Clark could’ve (should’ve) had Clark acknowledge the influence Lionel had on Lex, acknowledge Lionel’s abuse of Lex, but also has Clark reassuring Tess that there’s personal responsibility at hand. Lex made destructive choices and that doesn’t have to be her future.
Obviously the writers still have a plan for this Lex storyline seeing that Lucas Gabreel returns as Reunion Era! Lex, but I don’t see a payoff to a season of Clark Kent battling his several evil (L)exes, when their battle seems completely personal and therefore less weighty than the universal threat of Darkseid minions and the VRA. Darkseid and the VRA are two huge battles that Clark should be focusing on that has global repercussions versus this pissing match with Lex that affects only him and by extension, his friends.
Another reason why I wish they wouldn’t focus on Lex is because I’m afraid of how the writers would handle it. Clark seems steadfast in hate towards Lex and while I don’t think he should want to be Facebook friends with him, I do wish that Clark would struggle more over giving up on Lex. I recently skimmed because it’s kinda boring read “Miracle Monday” by Elliott S! Maggin. What the Wikipedia entry omits completely about the book is that throughout the book, Clark kept trying to appeal to Lex’s humanity. Even when Lex told him not to trust him, even when Lex orchestrated a way to send Superman to Hell. Towards the end of the book Clark asks a time traveler from the future (a descendent of Jimmy Olsen) if he and Lex ever become friends again. Because she can’t tell him the future, she only responds, “Someday”. What we find out is that although Lex had the chance to send Clark to Hell, he couldn’t bring himself to do it. He allowed Superman to believe that Superman outwitted him. The time travel writes that Superman correctly assumed there was goodness in a person even when one can’t see it. I wish that for Clark and Lex on the show. Lex will always be furious and caught up in his anger over Clark not letting him know his secret, but that doesn’t mean Clark shouldn’t have some lingering care and concern for Lex. My fear is that as this Alexander Luthor storyline goes further, it’ll just be a relationship based on hate.
Other Bits
~Isn't it odd how life works out. Clark always wanted to be a Luthor, but he wanted to marry into the name. And he always wanted Lex to write his name out over and over, just like he would write Lex's name on his notebook.
But not like this. Not. Like. This
~Bryan Q. Miller is my favorite staff writer, but this script wasn’t my favorite. It’s not as bad as “Bulletproof” (oh, I did not like that episode), but I think some things crossed too far over the line of the show’s realism and landed on the side of being too joke-y (that coffee shop scene seemed unending) and too self aware (Lionel breaking the fourth wall and saying, “..wouldn't want to miss how it all turns out."). I did like that he wrote Clark as having a sense of humor. The Clark/Lois hospital scene was very cute and light. With any other writer they would have Clark trying to impale himself on one of the Fortress’ crystals out of guilt over Lois being hurt.
~Alt Earth Tess tells Clark that theirs is another Earth but with a darker edge. If Clark Luthor never found/used the mirror box how would he have had that basis for comparison? How do they know about the alternate Earth? Did Jor-El tell them about it? Is there some Kryptonian travel guide?
~The Mirror Box looks looks like the Book of Rao
~Storylines demand it, but I find it implausible that Lionel would leave anything involving Kryptonians to any of his heirs especially Lex since he was in direct competition with him in trying to find out about aliens. He leaves Martha the Book of Rao, but not the rest?
~I can’t lie, I thought the Omega symbol on the shirt was because Clark joined a frat MakeMe Cum Louda
If I understand correctly, in the comics Earth Two has a Clark Kent and Lois Lane, but also has a Superwoman and Ultra Man who are not Clark Kent or Lois Lane but other beings.
Earth Two Lois dies during Crisis on Infinite/Final/Hell If I Know Earth and became a Black Lantern. So when Lois has that talk w/ hang dog Oliver about not finding a better guy, I wondered if there was another Clark in that timeline who should would meet. It seemed that her destiny in that timeline wasn’t to be Oliver.
~Lionel (to Clark): “I sometimes shudder to think what would’ve happened to my l’il Traveler if he had been discovered by the first ignorant farmer who came along.”
Score for invoking the traveler! As for the possibility of Lionel finding Clark, in an issue of “Booster Gold”, it shows one possible future had Lionel found Clark instead of the Kents.
~The line “There’s no take backs when it comes to Gold K.” made little sense considering there seems to be take backs because Clark Luthor has powers. Gold K robs Kryptonians of their powers completely. It’s bad enough they didn’t explain how Clark Luthor has a brand when his powers should’ve healed him (I still don’t know how Jor-El’s super duper AI power was able to brand Clark for so long in S3 either). /geek rant
~Clark: “Jor-El, I know we’re not on the best of terms right now.” They’re not? Even after that Jor-El/Lara OOC détente earlier this season?
~Tom’s back in getting nekkid fighting form.
~This Earth 2 Lionel just fights nasty! Regular Lionel has beaten Lex and called him names, but this one has certainly kicked it up a notch “Mommy Dearest” style. When Lionel told Tess, “I have worked too long and to hard to let you, a little half-bred tramp with a Magdalene complex to ruin everything.” I felt like I had been whipped. I wanted to call time-out. That was vicious.
Add to that the constant bad-touching of his kids and Earth Two Lionel is officially the worst parent in all the mulitverse.
Couldn’t he just tell Tess to hand it over? Grabby McGrabberson
Icarus
What I Loved
~Sweet merciful Rao, they got the proposal out the way at the jump. It was like how in “Lethal Weapon” Riggs had to put his dislocated shoulder back into place. It’s painful, but now it’s done. Now I can move on and whine about something else.
You got your wish, Lois. Happy now?
~The engagement party. Anytime Clark gets to have some fun, I’m all for it. I love when we get to see the team interact on a personal level. It’s something I hoped for after “Absolute Justice” when J’onn had his talk to Chloe. We need to see the friendships in action.
It even made me overlook the oddity that was the scene where Clark, Oliver and Carter are searching the VRA for files yet it turns into a conversation about Clark and Lois’ relationship.
The team took Lois and Clark’s engagement better than most took Ollie and Dinah’s
~Nice red herring with the street fight. I really thought Carter would get killed in the fight. It was surprised that he was killed saving Lois. Also, is death by impaling the #1 cause of death in Metropolis? First Jimmy and now Carter. Didn’t the General always say watch your six?
~I liked the red and blue flames engulfing Slade. It reminds me of Deathstroke’s costume.
~I don’t know what it is about Shanks portrayal of Carter that moves me. When he says to Oliver; “Even though I married Shayera a hundred times, I had to lose her that many, as well.” It broke my heart. He telegraphs wisdom and a strength that still shows the gentleness within. Plus, Oliver and Carter’s back and forth are always fun/funny.
And keeps in line with their comic relationship
~When I saw the JLA sprawled out in the tomb at Carter’s funeral I squeed.
I love the splash pages where the JLA are in a heap. It’s an oft-repeated image.
Let me show you how oft
What I Didn’t Love
~I don’t like the idea that darkness infects people. Almost like Darkseid’s has been injecting people through the ages. Why can’t there just be bad people? Why does it have to be a supernatural force? The battle between good and evil doesn’t have to be so literal.
~Chloe: “Lana wasn’t fated to be in Clark’s life.” ::Chortle:: ::Chortle::
~That’s all Clark has to do is use the Phantom Zone key? He doesn’t actually have to do battle with Darkseid Minions thus not having to confront this “darkness” inside him?
Does this mean we can get around to knocking out this Darkseid minions storyline that seems to be simmering on the back burner on low for the past month now?
Other Bits
~I don’t recall who pointed this out, but why would they wand the Daily Planet staffers in the basement? You have to enter through the front door, why not check them there? The writers were not thinking that day.
~Someone needs to write to the Daily Star about their homophobic headline. I know his last name is queen, but I think it relates more to him dressing up in boots with heels and having sex with men.
~Carter (to Clark): “It can’t always be you, Clark. This is all our fight.” Which is lovely and beautiful and absolutely correct, but SHUT UP, CARTER. But can’t it be Clark just this once? Can we see him actually handle something from beginning to end on his own?
Collateral
What I Loved
Tom’s smile!
~The show remembering that Pete exist.
~The Oliver/Chloe end scene. I even found this cloying exchange touching. Oliver (to Chloe): “Did the helmet, uh, say that I’d be sitting alone listening to old voicemails just to hear your voice or anything like that? Or that I’d be scanning every single stranger’s face on the subway just in hopes that I’d come across your smile, never to find it?”
I get why he wants to hold on to her; Oliver yearns for love and stability. What I don’t get is why Chloe is staying with him when I just don’t get the sense that she feels the same way about Oliver. What was the point of confiding in Tess if she wasn’t seeking someone else who had emotional barriers? I have a feeling that Chloe won’t survive S10 because this is a bit too clean cut.
What I Didn’t Love
~Pretty much everything that wasn’t listed above. I think my instant post-episode reaction was
Upon rewatch, I find that the ep wasn’t outrageously bad as so much as uneventful. Even with the homage to the iconic Superman/Lois flight in “Superman” (this episode borrowed from a lot of films: “Inception”, “The Matrix”, “Vanilla Sky”, .”eXsistenz” pretty much every mindscrew film made except that those films did it better).
I don’t know what the bottom line of the episode was. What was the point? Just to re-introduce Chloe? To show Clark flying?
Chloe
If this show could get away with having Chloe suddenly reveal that her name is really Diana Prince, Princess of Themyscira they’d do it. Chloe has been a composite of Lois Lane, a composite of Oracle, she had healing abilities, she could see the future thanks to Dr. Fate’s helmet and now she co-opted The Suicide Squad. She couldn’t just be in the squad, oh no, she has to run it because she’s the all-powerful Chloe, meanwhile Oliver is either crying into his scotch or flirting outrageously with men (which I don’t mind at all) and Clark is taking directives from everyone but can’t seem to make decisions on his own.
I don’t hate Chloe being pumped up as a superhero, I do hate that all of her bad deeds have gone ignored. I don’t find anything wrong with Chloe’s feet being held to the fire for her past deeds. Just as Clark hemmed up Tess in “Luthor”, Chloe needs the same talking to about why her past deeds make it hard to trust her. But whereas Tess has taken responsibilities for her actions, Chloe hasn’t. Mostly because no one has ever confront Chloe about all the fcuked up things she’s been party to.
She’s so oblivious to how wrong her actions have been that she had the nerves to tell Oliver, “Somewhere along the way he stopped having trust in me.”
Was it when you lied to him about Davis whereabouts, sending Clark on a wild goose chase as you kept Davis locked up in your basement (even knowing that he was getting out and killing people). Or was it when you put cameras on his property, used Oliver’s money to get a cache of Kryptonian weapons? Heaped guilt upon you about not going back in time to save Jimmy even though it was her actions that aided in Jimmy’s death.
It was so hard for me to not scream and gnash my teeth when Clark goes to her and asks, “How did you do it? Trust me back then before you found out?” Back when she had powers to pull the truth from people and she went to Martha to get the real story about your adoption even though you asked her to leave it alone? Back when she was so pissed about your relationship with Lana that she was in cahoots with Lionel?
Even Lois called out Dinah about her working for Lex (which I completely forgot), but no one thinks to remind Chloe of what she’s done wrong?
Chloe (to Clark): “It’s not really trust if you ask someone to explain themselves.” ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?! What kind of “love means never having to say you’re sorry.” piece of garbage is this?
He doesn’t even ask the rational question like “Chloe, why are you always stabbing me in the back?”
Clark is the only one who bows before people and begs for forgiveness for his perceived sin of protecting his secret. Clark’s secret is dangerous! How many times has people knowing his secret caused harm? Pete was put in danger, Nixon blackmailed the Kents, Alicia outed him to Chloe, the entire episode dealing with the world knowing his secret. There’s a reason why Clark kept it a secret; he wanted to protect those he cared about. I don’t see how Chloe constant lies and betrayal, along with Oliver’s and Dinah’s betrayal (Dinah forgot to cop to her participation in the Davis debacle in her rant against Chloe) are on the same level as Clark withholding his alien heritage. Trust goes both ways. It’s not all about Clark having to trust people who have done some shifty, untrustworthy things.
And the anvil of taking the leap in the portal = taking a blind leap of faith in Chloe made me want to heave.
Clark
I hope Tom was prepping “Booster” and that’s why this episode had him doing not much more than fretting in the background.
I’ve taking the stance that S10 isn’t about Clark becoming Superman-despite what CW’s lousy promo posters tout. S10 is Clark’s first year as Superman. This view is the only thing that makes these episodes where everyone has something to do but Clark tolerable. It’s incredible to me that a season with four different antagonist camps (VRA, Suicide Squad, the Luthors and Darkseid minions) could find Clark with so little to do. Even worse there seems to be little momentum to this season. It’s not a run-up to the finale, it’s more like an amble; a Sunday morning leisurely stroll with no destination in sight.
Other Bits
~The Suicide Squad did something to Clark’s brain so that he’d lose his powers? That’s not how his powers work! It’s not a brain thing, it’s a yellow sun fueling his body thing. This makes no sense unless this means the Squad doesn’t know he’s an alien, which is absurd because the Suicide Squad is an offshoot of Checkmate and Checkmate knew the Blur was an alien IIRC.
~Complete waste of Canary. I thought Dinah’s purpose was to put a conflict in Oliver and Chloe’s relationship. I didn’t know she was there to have a “Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle” ripoff fight with Chloe?
On the upside Alaina is still gorgeous even when she had Dinah whining to Clark, coming off like some spoiled brat from “My Super Sweet 16” whose parents tell her that she can’t have the entire cast of “Glee” perform at her bash. “Come on, Clark. You and I both saw her experimenting on us in a government lab!” I haven’t been able to wear my fishnets in three weeks, waah!”
~Chloe (To Chloe): “The computer runs a scan every six minutes. When it detects me it releases an anti-virus posse full of men in black.”
Oliver:: “So these guys are virtual cops?”
Chloe: “Avatars”.
Trick, I watched “Inception” all weekend. Those are called projections. And while you wore a very snappy suit
Chloe DeGeneres
, you are no Arthur and Oliver is no Eames. But I still want to see him shirtless and shadowboxing like Tom Hardy.
~What was the final story on Maxwell Lord? Did he get killed in that episode with Martha or not? This is the one episode where Max’s mental ministrations would’ve worked perfectly.
~First Oliver has parent issues like Lex. Then he has sex with Clark like Lex. Now Oliver gets put in an asylum like Lex. He’s such a copycat.
~I still can’t get over Chloe blackmailing Rick Flag into taking over control of his operation. He has Plastique, Deadshot and Warp on his team, she could’ve been killed fifteen times over. Maybe there’s some glamor over Chloe that makes people lose all rational thought. He is really that afraid of being outed by her to the government that he would roll over? I call shenanigans!
~How did the Squad orchestrate taking out the group at Carter’s funeral? How did they know where they were having the funeral? How did they put the whatever-the-hell it was that delivered the knockout gas?
Next week: “Beacon”, featuring this guy.
Welcome back, Lucas!
