Echolls Family Christmas 2006

[dead_hooker_2]

Trina has decided, in that way Trina decides things, that she's going to have a nice, happy, normal family Christmas. The fact that she has no nice, happy, normal family at any other time of the year does not deter her. She's going to have family and carols and cook food and there's going to be a Christmas like you have in the movies, not one

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[obligatoryass]

Logan opens the door, and the house, at first, smells delicious. Like sweet things cooking, except he knows how Trina feels about baking, so he chalks it up to a candle.

Underneath the pleasant smell, though, is one far less pleasing: Food gone wrong. He has no idea what she's done to make it smell that bad, but it gets worse as he nears the kitchen.

"Um, hello?" he calls.

[dead_hooker_2]

"Merry Christmas, Logan," says Trina.

There might be smoke pouring out of the oven.

It's totally normal, right?

[obligatoryass]

"Merry -"

Logan stops and heroically turns off the oven. "Do you have a fire extinguisher?" he asks, peering into the oven. "I can't tell if this is actually on fire. There's too much smoke."

He coughs, making his point.

[dead_hooker_2]

"It's not that much smoke," she says. "It's just . . . for flavoring or something."

Trina has managed to cook a turkey that is black on the outside and still frozen in the middle.

Well, "cook" might be the wrong word.

The smoke alarm goes off.