Quinn and LK meet a gnome who makes thief elixirs; we buy some stuff
he tries to sell us some literal snake oil that supposedly raises AC by 4
he does a pretty good job of selling it, actually - it's the only one he's got, for 30gp. LK offers to buy it for 35. He's...guileless.
we go see Aelith to ask if she's seen any of the old crew: no dice. not even Glorian.
back up into the Pinched Pocket, separately. it's been half an hour. there's a dwarf cursing outside. he's had to poop for ages. he sees Quinn exit, and as he's seated on the toilet LK exits, with the toilet sliding sideways under his astonished butt.
Just a little flavour, DM says.
Back in the PP; Hal waves everyone over. LK awkwardly tries to lie about how and why we were in there for so long.
This doesn't go very well. Hal is suspicious: Quinn puts LK out of his guileless misery by telling them about the Thieves' Guild.
She didn't take Hal because he's kind of...good...and Zorn is something of an idiot.
Zorn takes umbrage to this and waggles his painted on angry eyebrows.
Hal isn't sure as to whether that's a compliment.
LK briefs them on Strud and the wanted posters. Hal asks if there are pictures of a strapping young man - oh, right, she doesn't know.
VS muses that THAT was what that was that she saw in the Thief she slept with.
Quinn realises the poster is of how she looks in disguise, they already know what she looks like.
Quinn panics a little and puts on a fake goatee, to go with Zorn's painted eyebrows.
Hal is super stoked about there being another half-elf, Aelith. He's been trying to be good buds with LK.
To the house of Strud! Through the dark Shantytown.
And now it's raining! We're slogging through the muddy road, there's orphans everywhere...
VS cries a single tear. Two tears. One for each boob.
There's houses on top of houses; it's somewhat ramshackle.
There's an old apartment that Quinn used to live in. She's overcome by nostalgia; she used to like living there. Good ocean view.
There's mainly a bunch of shitty carts selling produce. VS buys 30 cabbages with the 3gp she has, and goes around giving them to everyone she sees.
It's the best deal he's ever gotten, the cabbage seller - desperately hides the money.
Zorn would rather cast Fireball and put them out of their misery. Turns out Zorn is an anti-natalist.
There's a very dingy alleyway into a basement apartment.
We send Zorn's spider in to see if there's anybody home. There isn't. Thank god.
We unlock the door and check for traps. There's a pressure plate. Hal presses forward a bit, bumping all of us forward. Quinn is a little irritated, and LK quietly informs him about Quinn doing her paranoid thing and how it usually works out best to let her do her thing.
LK lights a torch; VS casts Dancing Lights just because she can.
Hal picks up the mattress and checks underneath. He finds 50gp under it, in a sack. He shares it.
There's a cubby, and a desk. Quinn checks for traps - there's a fake bottom on the drawer, with some documents in there.
Quinn hands off the documents to LK to read while she checks over the rest of the desk.
The documents say: your mission is simple. if you find the one you seek, do not approach her on sight. lead her to the spot as close as you can, and we will complete the bounty. may the darkness guide you. signed, Rodun.
Hal says oh gosh, there's somebody else involved, who do you think this lady this Rodun is talking about is?
A lot of gears are turning in Quinn's mind. Is it a good thing that Hal thinks she's a man? Is it a bad thing?
There's some things you don't know...Hal.
Do you know who she is? he asks. Not only do I know, Quinn replies, you know.
It's VS! he cries. VS, kind of dumb, is also convinced it's her.
LK puts Quinn out of her uncomfortable misery.
TYPICAL, cries Zorn. PRIME DISSEMBLER.
Hal is discomfited by this and says it is good that we are...friends...
Adventure Friend Zone.
Zorn finds a dirty magazine under the bed for VS. Fifty Shades of Greyscale! He gets Inspiration for it. The Lusty Argonian Maid.
Quinn gets clapped on the back by Hal. Zorn sees this and is relieved.
OOC everybody suddenly remembers that Zorn is gay! And apparently totally into Hal.
Hal looks up and sees stone on the ceiling. Very damp.
VS marvels as to what lizard people can do. She mostly looked at the pictures. She didn't read it for the articles.
Quinn points out the sneaky way (pretend to be turning in the bounty, big fight as necessary), or the open way (go around advertising that Quinn is back in town and see who comes sniffing).
LK advises intel search for this Rodun character. He also advises that we Polymorph someone into what VS says is a sexier version of Quinn to see if they can bluff the receivers.
At first Quinn wants to say that sounds unsafe for whoever is doing it, realises it's VS, and then doesn't care.
Back to the Thieves' Guild. Hal bumps his head entering.
VS starts looking around to see if anyone is interested. She likes dangerous men.
Aelith is down there - she's the only half-elf - Hal goes and introduces himself, as another half-elf. LK hastily accompanies him, Quinn is thankful that LK is chaperoning the hapless good people.
Aelith is uncomfortable but doesn't believe they're a threat, so...okay. Take care of yourself.
May Lathander guide you! he calls after her retreating back.
VS sidles up to the most dangerous, most good-looking man and tries to get info out of him.
What's this about, she says, gesturing toward the Wanted poster.
He doesn't have any interest in her, since she doesn't have a job for him.
Sounding like a total narc, she says she wants to make underworld friends. Who's Rodun?
He says he doesn't believe she can steal anything and saunters off. I could steal your virginity! she yells.
He turns back and disdainfully says "...no. Not even the Tieflings."
LK is entirely occupied trying to keep Hal from blowing all our covers.
Hal goes over and looks uncomfortably long at the poster. She's attracted, but she knows she shouldn't be.
Quinn grabs the only option left, Zorn, and tells him to look intimidating. He Prestis fireballs into his hands, to the consternation of the people around us. Embarrassed, he dismisses them.
We go around looking for a fence or someone who has connections outside of the thieves. No such luck.
Hal chats somewhat with VS, asking if he's got any other secrets to know. VS says nothing...except LK is super gay. The only evidence she has for this belief this is that he hasn't gone for her.
But never for Zorn, she says, she'll never sleep with him.
An impatient Zorn goes and hires Yex, the blacksmith lizardkin, to pretend to be Strud.
He bargains Zorn up to 410gp. He's also overjoyed that him and his father will now be able to afford more iron.
Hal extends his aura of Cannot Be Frightened to an anxious Yex, as we venture towards the dropoff point. He likes that we're good humans. Well. Mostly humans.
Hal is really very friendly with him! Yex is gratified.
LK shows off his Handaxe of Hurling to an astonished Yex. He wants to see it and asks who crafted it, but we have no idea. We found it.
Quinn gives LK her ring of Greater Inviz. Tiefling VS will accompany Yex and a nominally tied up Quinn.
K can't see anything in the upcoming sewer junction that is the dropoff spot.
Zorn activates a Major Image, shrouding them in an illusion. They fade from view as we progress down the sewer.
As we approach, there is a click...and three spike walls close in on the T junction.
Quinn sprints to one of the walls and activates the Immovable Rod. Yex and her are spared, but the others, running to the intersection...the floor opens up and they all slide down.
They land in a bump and are safe, but Quinn and Yex don't know that. They can see that the architecture around them is very old. Zorn tries a History check, and finds he's familiar with it. It was clearly built by elves, before the elves left the mainland.
Quinn is somewhat nonplussed. They're out of Message range.
She tells Yex, I'm going to turn this rod off in a second. It might get kind of hairy down there.
Just give me a sword, Yex says.
You a strong lizard? Yeah, stronger than you, he retorts, now give me a sword.
Yex, Quinn snickers, may I please introduce you to Steeltus.
An irate Steeltus is produced, annoyed there hasn't been any violence. Steeltus, you want to kill, right? You want to be wielded by someone strong, right? Steeltus, may I introduce you to Yex, the blacksmith.
It's love at first sight. He marvels at the worksmanship, and the sword blushes a little.
He hops down, Quinn hastily turns off the rod and leaps down. She doesn't successfully stick the landing, her dagger bounces off as she tries to jam it into the wall before she slides out the chute.
VS, very inadvisedly, yells down the hallway, HEY!
A cacophony of footsteps come charging down, with angry people yelling and higher pitched curious voices.
Quinn shoots VS a VERY dirty look.
A stampede of goblins comes charging around the corner. LK prepares a volley of explosive bolts.
LK tries to Intimidate them with a bellowing cry, calling them feeble cretins. He scares the shit out of 6/10, who promptly scarper.
Zorn's Hypnotic Pattern goes off, charming basically all of them. They're all tripping balls right now.
Quinn, impressed, is revising her prior opinion of him being an idiot.
LK sneaks forward and sees even MORE goblins, going around the corner.
AND SOME DROW?!
Standard Drow warriors with bows. LK looses a volley with his two explosive arrows.
Lord "Cannon" Kelfin kills virtually everyone. A stunned Quinn quietly hands off 2 of her 3 explosive bolts to LK.
Quinn moves forward, and sees through K that there's a BUNCH of Drow. She uses Minor Illusion to make a booming voice to Intimidate them - you've seen what just happened, and that's just one of us. Put it down, and nobody else gets hurt.
7 out of 15 of them comply. Quinn sings back, don't say we didn't warn you...
8 of them try for us; all of them miss LK, but 3/4 hit Quinn. She takes poison damage. Jesus, 3 out of 4?! Thankfully Zorn puts an Arcane Ward on one of them. She only loses 10.
Still, poison.
Hal puts Bless on LK, Quinn, and herself. Whenever we make a saving throw or attack roll, they can add a d4 for a minute.
Yex sprints forward, ready to go! VS Hastes LK.
Cannon Kelfin steps forward, volleying forward and killing two more Drow...and then the rest of them.
The rest are terrified. Hal saunters up with his Lathander Glaive, and in his baritone, intones BEGONE, YE FIENDS, IN THE NAME OF LATHANDER. The Drow run for it.
Hal dispels poison from Quinn; VS removes Haste, and LK is exhausted; Zorn buddies up to the goblin and says, hey buddy. who sent you?
I don't think I should tell you...
Aw, come on.
We came down here with Rizzit!
Who's that?
He's our master...
Your master?
He's good with bombs...
What's he use the bombs for?
Blow stuff up? I don't know.
Why you trying to kill us?
Rizzit told us to...but now I don't want to anymore...
Why don't you have a little nap?
Nap! Yeah...!
Why don't you go tell your goblin friends that?
Zorn comes around and tells us it's RZA. GZA can't be too far behind.
VS and Zorn ready Fireballs to the rest of the goblins - guys, at least one of you is going to take a nap, but if the rest of you don't, well...you're going to get blown to smithereens.
They run for it.
We search the bodies. The decapitated Drow have 5 poison arrows on them; the rest were blown up and/or broken. Quinn hands off 3 of the 5 to Cannon Kelfin.