i won't critique this, seeing as there isn't much you could change about it without changing the theme of...?
but i like "I see the light... I saw the light... It was overhyped... And underscored."
and "The ear-splitting screams are all in your head, honey." "Let's do lunch." "Paper or plastic?" "Did you know that human flesh is biodegradable?" it's clever.
in response to this i'm going to put of my recent poems here. as a mere present, not trying to say it's better or good or anything.
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but i like "I see the light...
I saw the light...
It was overhyped...
And underscored."
and "The ear-splitting screams are all in your head, honey."
"Let's do lunch."
"Paper or plastic?"
"Did you know that human flesh is biodegradable?"
it's clever.
in response to this i'm going to put of my recent poems here. as a mere present, not trying to say it's better or good or anything.
Reply
chauffeur decadence about,
the end-of-tunnel light
seeming not-so-bright at all.
The poisoned panacea-
using apathy-cemented bricks
to build a multi-layered
shelter from insecurity.
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