Forbidden Love Chapter 20
Title: Forbidden Love
Author: dean_itoh
Pairing/Subject: Takaki Yuya/Yamada Ryosuke
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: You know that the boys aren't mine~
Summary: Sometimes love is just to let go
“You’re still coming.”
The girl turned in surprise and stoned when she saw the person who was standing in front of her and darted her a cold stare.
“Inoo.”
“After what you’ve done, you’re still have a courage to come here.”
The girl gaped for a moment and then gulped. “I don’t remember I did anything wrong.”
“We have all been scattered, and it’s because of your selfish feeling of love.”
“What?”
“Your love is very blind. So blind until you can’t see that you’ve hurt someone else.”
Shinkawa gaped but then breathed heavily. “Look. I know that Yuya loves Yamada. It’s enough for me to see him happy. I love him, but doesn’t mean that I want him to be mine. I’m okay with this unrequited feeling.”
Inoo narrowed his eyes. “Have you ever heard about the word intolerable, pretty?”
Shinkawa didn’t say anything. She just blinked many times.
“I can’t tolerate your feeling for Takaki because it hurts so many people around him. You hurt us. Everyone of us. We are all scattered because of you, and because of that, your love is categorized as something that cannot be tolerated.”
Shinkawa stoned. She shut her mouth tight. She could feel her heart was slashed. She gulped many times, blinked fast to prevent her tears to fall. She looked away for a moment before turned to Inoo.
“I love him. Too much until I can’t handle myself to not showing him my feeling. I love him until I can’t live without seeing him even a moment. I love him so much but it’s okay for me if he doesn’t love me back.”
“Then let him go.”
Shinkawa stopped moving and talking. She lost her words and didn’t know what to say.
“With you still showing yourself in front of him, you built insecure feeling in Yamada’s heart.”
Shinkawa breathed heavily.
“If he loves Yuya, he will absolutely trust him.”
“He trusted him.” Inoo answered her quickly. “We know he never questioned about Takaki’s love because he knew that Takaki loves him too.”
“Then why does he doubt Yuya’s feeling?”
“He never doubt Takaki’s feeling. He was only well aware that they’re crossing the line. They’ve crossed the line. They shouldn’t fall in love with each other, because they’re both men. They have the same sex and they fall in love with each other. No one will stand for him when this blow out. Everyone will deny him, and people will choose you to be the bride of Takaki. Yamada is just trying to think realistically.”
Shinkawa looked away. She tried hard not to say anything because she knew that she was in the wrong place. She was totally aware of it. What Inoo had said was totally right. She shouldn’t be there. She shouldn’t have appeared at all. She shouldn’t even love Takaki.
Suddenly time stopped. Everything around her stopped moving. She was stunned and didn’t even blink. It was the longest five seconds in her life. She was unable to think anything. Her mind suddenly felt empty.
What’s this? He’s kissing me?
She blinked many times when she realized what was happening.
A Kiss?
With all her might she pushed Inoo.
“How dare you do this to me?!”
Inoo grinned. “Don’t you feel anything?”
“Of course I don’t feel anything!”
Shinkawa wiped her lips many times, as if trying to erase all of traces of Inoo’s lips on them.
Inoo nodded several times. He folded his arms and took a glance to the girl.
“So that’s how it is. You won’t feel anything if you do it with the person you don’t love.”
The girl stared at him in disbelief. “How could you do this to me?”
Inoo sighed dramatically. “I just want to know how it feels. Kissing a stranger, someone you never know before.”
Shinkawa gaped. “What? Why me?”
Inoo straightened his body. He walked over the girl, and once again he cornered her to the wall and smiled wickedly.
“Because your existence made one of my best friends suffered. Because you’re being here, made my best friends suffered. They cried a lot, and I can’t just look at them in silent.”
Shinkawa could only gaped at the sharp statement for a moment.
“It’s better if you don’t show up at all from the very beginning.”
“You do know that it’s unrequited.”
“Still, because of you we’re scattered.”
Shinkawa shut her mouth tightly. Her heart slashed to pieces. She knew she wasn’t right for loving Takaki because she knew that the person had fallen in love with someone else, but who can refuse when the heart had decided to fall in love? Even brain got blunt when the heart had made a decision. Even all logic will be erased when the heart had been tethered to someone.
Shinkawa could no longer hold back her tears. They fell in her cheeks. She turned and finally walked away, leaving Inoo, who was only staring at her silently at his place. There was a pity in his heart for the girl, but he just remained silent.
I’m sorry, but if you keep chasing Takaki, we will be ruined. Please, find other people who will give you the same feeling equally. You won’t be happy too if you’re still like this. You will be suffered if you continue to force yourself to keep this unrequited feeling.
Inoo sighed and looked down. He stared at the floor below him in silence.
If human could manage everything. If feelings can be directed according to logic, surely, there will be no hurt.
Inoo turned to the direction where the girl had disappeared, then looked to the door in front of him. He didn’t move for a while. He didn’t even blink. He stared blankly to the almost brown door in front of him. He bit his lower lip and breathed heavily. He took out the key from his pocket and unlock the door. Slowly, he pushed the door to open wide.
Cold.
He looked around and could feel the emptiness of the room.
Inoo walked in and closed the door behind him. He once again look around and decided to walk into the couch. He sat down and stared at another door in front of him.
Where are you?
He took out his phone and dialed certain numbers. For a while he waited, and once again he received another suffocated tone. The numbers he dialed was inactive.
He closed his eyes.
Can’t you trust me? Why don’t you tell me anything? Where are you?
“He’s still nowhere to find.”
Inoo opened his eyes in surprise and found Hikaru was standing in front of him.
“I’ve been searching to the place he usually visits but found nothing. I went to the place where he usually goes to dive, but no one saw him either.”
Inoo closed his eyes once again and leaned to couch. He didn’t say anything. It was enough to see the devastated look on Hikaru. He didn’t want to make him even more depressed with all of his questions.
Hikaru sat beside Inoo in silence. He didn’t say a word. He just sat motionless in his place, while his brain spun rapidly, examining everything, trying to remember places he might have missed.
Hikaru failed. He closed his eyes. His mind didn’t want to cooperate at all. It didn’t give him any more clue.
The door opened. Yabu and Daiki entered in silence, and suddenly lost their hope. Daiki almost dropped himself to the floor, and finally decided to lay down. He looked very pale.
No one talk, even when Yabu opened the curtain and looked out the window in silence. The sky looked so dull at the time. Yabu closed his eyes and gripped the curtain hard.
Where are you?
Once again the door suddenly opened, revealed Yuto and Chinen who lost their will to throw any question. It was enough for them to see the worry on the elders’ faces. They definitely couldn’t find about Takaki’s whereabout too.
Chinen sat down near Daiki and patted his arm gently. It felt too suffocated to see the older without his smile. While Yuto, he pulled a chair and sat on it without words too. He glanced around and suddenly felt very lonely. Everyone seemed lost their willing to say anything. Everyone looked like total strangers to each other, but he couldn’t find the right sentence to start a conversation with them too. He suddenly lost his words.
“We’ve been together for eleven years ..., almost twelve, but I feel like a total stranger for him right now.” Inoo mumbled, but all of them could hear him clearly.
No one responded to his statement because suddenly they felt the same.
“Wow! Very nice room.”
Everyone turned and they gaped.
“Keito!”
Almost all of them yelled the same name, made the said person smiled widely while waving and mouthed a hi.
“Hey! I’m hurt. I’m the one who say hello, and no one recognize me?”
“Ryu!”
Ryutaro sighed dramatically and walked closer.
“You sounded like broken dolls.”
No one moved. They didn’t even respond to Ryu’s statement. They felt maybe he was right after all. Or wrong. They didn’t understand. All they knew, they had absolutely no idea what to do.
Takaki’s gone.
Yamada didn’t even care about it. Or looked like he didn’t care at all.
They knew Yamada was crying in silence. He just didn’t want the others to know. He bottled up everything alone. He prefered to swallow his tears alone.
And they couldn’t even had a chance to help him.
“So this is the power of a Takaki.”
Everyone looked at Ryutaro in wonder.
“People always underestimated him. They always considered him as a stupid who can’t act and bad at dancing, who has the less drama among all of the members, but look at you now,” Ryu look around the members one by one, “with him not around, you look like broken dolls.”
“I never underestimated him, and I never considered him as a stupid either.” Said Inoo flatly. His eyes were closed again and he leaned back to the couch.
Ryutaro looked around and shook his head. He suddenly lost his words. He turned to Keito just to receive a shrug from him. He sighed heavily and took a chair.
“Okay, let’s hope Yamada can find a clue where Takaki is.”
Everyone looked at Ryutaro and threw him a silent question.
“Yes, he is looking for Takaki now. So le’t hope he can find something to lead us to him.”
A very tiny hope suddenly raised in the air, but they knew they couldn’t ask more. They searched, and they couldn’t find any clue. They had gone to the possible place that Takaki might go, but failed to find any trace of him.
Author: dean_itoh
Pairing/Subject: Takaki Yuya/Yamada Ryosuke
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: You know that the boys aren't mine~
Summary: Sometimes love is just to let go
“You’re still coming.”
The girl turned in surprise and stoned when she saw the person who was standing in front of her and darted her a cold stare.
“Inoo.”
“After what you’ve done, you’re still have a courage to come here.”
The girl gaped for a moment and then gulped. “I don’t remember I did anything wrong.”
“We have all been scattered, and it’s because of your selfish feeling of love.”
“What?”
“Your love is very blind. So blind until you can’t see that you’ve hurt someone else.”
Shinkawa gaped but then breathed heavily. “Look. I know that Yuya loves Yamada. It’s enough for me to see him happy. I love him, but doesn’t mean that I want him to be mine. I’m okay with this unrequited feeling.”
Inoo narrowed his eyes. “Have you ever heard about the word intolerable, pretty?”
Shinkawa didn’t say anything. She just blinked many times.
“I can’t tolerate your feeling for Takaki because it hurts so many people around him. You hurt us. Everyone of us. We are all scattered because of you, and because of that, your love is categorized as something that cannot be tolerated.”
Shinkawa stoned. She shut her mouth tight. She could feel her heart was slashed. She gulped many times, blinked fast to prevent her tears to fall. She looked away for a moment before turned to Inoo.
“I love him. Too much until I can’t handle myself to not showing him my feeling. I love him until I can’t live without seeing him even a moment. I love him so much but it’s okay for me if he doesn’t love me back.”
“Then let him go.”
Shinkawa stopped moving and talking. She lost her words and didn’t know what to say.
“With you still showing yourself in front of him, you built insecure feeling in Yamada’s heart.”
Shinkawa breathed heavily.
“If he loves Yuya, he will absolutely trust him.”
“He trusted him.” Inoo answered her quickly. “We know he never questioned about Takaki’s love because he knew that Takaki loves him too.”
“Then why does he doubt Yuya’s feeling?”
“He never doubt Takaki’s feeling. He was only well aware that they’re crossing the line. They’ve crossed the line. They shouldn’t fall in love with each other, because they’re both men. They have the same sex and they fall in love with each other. No one will stand for him when this blow out. Everyone will deny him, and people will choose you to be the bride of Takaki. Yamada is just trying to think realistically.”
Shinkawa looked away. She tried hard not to say anything because she knew that she was in the wrong place. She was totally aware of it. What Inoo had said was totally right. She shouldn’t be there. She shouldn’t have appeared at all. She shouldn’t even love Takaki.
Suddenly time stopped. Everything around her stopped moving. She was stunned and didn’t even blink. It was the longest five seconds in her life. She was unable to think anything. Her mind suddenly felt empty.
What’s this? He’s kissing me?
She blinked many times when she realized what was happening.
A Kiss?
With all her might she pushed Inoo.
“How dare you do this to me?!”
Inoo grinned. “Don’t you feel anything?”
“Of course I don’t feel anything!”
Shinkawa wiped her lips many times, as if trying to erase all of traces of Inoo’s lips on them.
Inoo nodded several times. He folded his arms and took a glance to the girl.
“So that’s how it is. You won’t feel anything if you do it with the person you don’t love.”
The girl stared at him in disbelief. “How could you do this to me?”
Inoo sighed dramatically. “I just want to know how it feels. Kissing a stranger, someone you never know before.”
Shinkawa gaped. “What? Why me?”
Inoo straightened his body. He walked over the girl, and once again he cornered her to the wall and smiled wickedly.
“Because your existence made one of my best friends suffered. Because you’re being here, made my best friends suffered. They cried a lot, and I can’t just look at them in silent.”
Shinkawa could only gaped at the sharp statement for a moment.
“It’s better if you don’t show up at all from the very beginning.”
“You do know that it’s unrequited.”
“Still, because of you we’re scattered.”
Shinkawa shut her mouth tightly. Her heart slashed to pieces. She knew she wasn’t right for loving Takaki because she knew that the person had fallen in love with someone else, but who can refuse when the heart had decided to fall in love? Even brain got blunt when the heart had made a decision. Even all logic will be erased when the heart had been tethered to someone.
Shinkawa could no longer hold back her tears. They fell in her cheeks. She turned and finally walked away, leaving Inoo, who was only staring at her silently at his place. There was a pity in his heart for the girl, but he just remained silent.
I’m sorry, but if you keep chasing Takaki, we will be ruined. Please, find other people who will give you the same feeling equally. You won’t be happy too if you’re still like this. You will be suffered if you continue to force yourself to keep this unrequited feeling.
Inoo sighed and looked down. He stared at the floor below him in silence.
If human could manage everything. If feelings can be directed according to logic, surely, there will be no hurt.
Inoo turned to the direction where the girl had disappeared, then looked to the door in front of him. He didn’t move for a while. He didn’t even blink. He stared blankly to the almost brown door in front of him. He bit his lower lip and breathed heavily. He took out the key from his pocket and unlock the door. Slowly, he pushed the door to open wide.
Cold.
He looked around and could feel the emptiness of the room.
Inoo walked in and closed the door behind him. He once again look around and decided to walk into the couch. He sat down and stared at another door in front of him.
Where are you?
He took out his phone and dialed certain numbers. For a while he waited, and once again he received another suffocated tone. The numbers he dialed was inactive.
He closed his eyes.
Can’t you trust me? Why don’t you tell me anything? Where are you?
“He’s still nowhere to find.”
Inoo opened his eyes in surprise and found Hikaru was standing in front of him.
“I’ve been searching to the place he usually visits but found nothing. I went to the place where he usually goes to dive, but no one saw him either.”
Inoo closed his eyes once again and leaned to couch. He didn’t say anything. It was enough to see the devastated look on Hikaru. He didn’t want to make him even more depressed with all of his questions.
Hikaru sat beside Inoo in silence. He didn’t say a word. He just sat motionless in his place, while his brain spun rapidly, examining everything, trying to remember places he might have missed.
Hikaru failed. He closed his eyes. His mind didn’t want to cooperate at all. It didn’t give him any more clue.
The door opened. Yabu and Daiki entered in silence, and suddenly lost their hope. Daiki almost dropped himself to the floor, and finally decided to lay down. He looked very pale.
No one talk, even when Yabu opened the curtain and looked out the window in silence. The sky looked so dull at the time. Yabu closed his eyes and gripped the curtain hard.
Where are you?
Once again the door suddenly opened, revealed Yuto and Chinen who lost their will to throw any question. It was enough for them to see the worry on the elders’ faces. They definitely couldn’t find about Takaki’s whereabout too.
Chinen sat down near Daiki and patted his arm gently. It felt too suffocated to see the older without his smile. While Yuto, he pulled a chair and sat on it without words too. He glanced around and suddenly felt very lonely. Everyone seemed lost their willing to say anything. Everyone looked like total strangers to each other, but he couldn’t find the right sentence to start a conversation with them too. He suddenly lost his words.
“We’ve been together for eleven years ..., almost twelve, but I feel like a total stranger for him right now.” Inoo mumbled, but all of them could hear him clearly.
No one responded to his statement because suddenly they felt the same.
“Wow! Very nice room.”
Everyone turned and they gaped.
“Keito!”
Almost all of them yelled the same name, made the said person smiled widely while waving and mouthed a hi.
“Hey! I’m hurt. I’m the one who say hello, and no one recognize me?”
“Ryu!”
Ryutaro sighed dramatically and walked closer.
“You sounded like broken dolls.”
No one moved. They didn’t even respond to Ryu’s statement. They felt maybe he was right after all. Or wrong. They didn’t understand. All they knew, they had absolutely no idea what to do.
Takaki’s gone.
Yamada didn’t even care about it. Or looked like he didn’t care at all.
They knew Yamada was crying in silence. He just didn’t want the others to know. He bottled up everything alone. He prefered to swallow his tears alone.
And they couldn’t even had a chance to help him.
“So this is the power of a Takaki.”
Everyone looked at Ryutaro in wonder.
“People always underestimated him. They always considered him as a stupid who can’t act and bad at dancing, who has the less drama among all of the members, but look at you now,” Ryu look around the members one by one, “with him not around, you look like broken dolls.”
“I never underestimated him, and I never considered him as a stupid either.” Said Inoo flatly. His eyes were closed again and he leaned back to the couch.
Ryutaro looked around and shook his head. He suddenly lost his words. He turned to Keito just to receive a shrug from him. He sighed heavily and took a chair.
“Okay, let’s hope Yamada can find a clue where Takaki is.”
Everyone looked at Ryutaro and threw him a silent question.
“Yes, he is looking for Takaki now. So le’t hope he can find something to lead us to him.”
A very tiny hope suddenly raised in the air, but they knew they couldn’t ask more. They searched, and they couldn’t find any clue. They had gone to the possible place that Takaki might go, but failed to find any trace of him.