Comments | debbiejoy: Knowing when to say "enough"

debbiejoy

Knowing when to say "enough"

Apr 07, 2009 17:28

When we took Cody in we agreed to take care of him, feed him, clothe him, drive him, spoil him, and love him. All he had to do was go to school and pass his classes. He's no longer in the regular Beal City high school as he failed his classes last semester. He's been going to the Beal City alternative school. He's failing there too. He's been ( Read more... )

Comments 8

caseystratton April 8 2009, 00:41:42 UTC

I can understand feeling guilty but lord knows I would have said enough WAY before you have! Extra trips for friends' forgotten shit??? NO. You guys have obviously gone above and beyond and unfortunately, as it is so often with teens it will be years before he realizes that, if he does at all. You can't be responsible for him not holding up his end of the deal, and letting this go on won't teach him anything anyway. Sometimes we have to fall to figure stuff out. It's a rite of passage, right? I think in the end you should feel that you did as much as you could and then some. You aren't police, you're family. Soon he'll learn that you must pay the price for the choices you make in the real world.

Sorry it has been so dramatic for you both! I'll send some serenity your way!

debbiejoy April 8 2009, 01:26:45 UTC

You have been sending serenity...I've been listening to your music every chance I get for the past few weeks. Thank you!

tinawiesen April 8 2009, 01:29:03 UTC

Not any of this is fair, my friend. You and Rickie have given so much, especially from your hearts, that all the rest of the brokenness pales in comparison.

I'm so sorry...

:(

debbiejoy April 8 2009, 01:34:00 UTC

Thank you.

kevenn April 8 2009, 01:40:38 UTC

I think what you guys did was amazing. But it obviously was taken for granted. You shouldn't feel guilty. only disappointed in him for not even doing the bare minimum. Everyone should be so lucky to have people like you guys in their family.

debbiejoy April 8 2009, 03:35:33 UTC

We talked to him a bit this evening and told him that he wasn't hurting anyone but himself. Since Rickie's the guardian of record until the 24th we'll give him that to see if he's willing to try harder: Work his butt off to finish credits; get out and look for a job; go to school everyday... I really don't expect much to change, but according to the courts he's our responsibility until then, so we may as well see what kind of effort he puts in between now and then, and whether he's willing to accept responsibilty for himself.

doodlethoughts April 8 2009, 04:11:14 UTC

wow....you have gone WAY above and beyond! maybe even too far above and beyond??
It's true that some people need 'help,' but they also have to be willing to receive said 'help.'

I'm not trying to melign all teenagers, because I know there are some good ones out there, but my overall impression on the younger generations is not pretty...I consider many of them a lazy ungrateful lot that think everything should be given to them on silver platters....
but that's just my personal opinion and obsevation.

Maybe he needed/needs boot camp??

You and Rickie went above the call of duty and he took advantage of that. He only has himself to blame for anything that happens now...and I hope you won't feel guilty, you gave with your heart, and that was the best thing you could do.

debbiejoy April 8 2009, 19:11:45 UTC

We had a come-to-Jesus-meeting with him last night. We don't think it'll do too much good at this late date, but hope springs eternal. He's here until the 24th anyway since we're legally responsible for him 'til then. We'll see if any great miracles happen in the next couple of weeks. (I'm definitely not holding my breath!)