Human physiology: THE NOSE
Whatever higher being/evolutionary trait spawned blood vessels in the nasal cavity so close to the surface of the epidermal layer really must've been smoking some bad pot or other mind-altering drug.
It's pretty bad when you have three nosebleeds in the span of 4 days, two of which lasted significantly longer than 10 minutes each.
This time, I had to go to the clinic to get it all checked out. Which is fine and dandy. Because I would've gone if it started again on Tuesday after the first bout. The cause of such is unknown. At least to the doctor who checked me out at the walk-in. So, there I am, sitting in the waiting room after checking in, watching everyone watch me, dabbing at my nose with a hand towel. After being there for 10 minutes and my nose just dribbling, still, it starts up, full out again. Alright, fine. Pinch and lean -forward- (For those who lean -back-, I hope you drown. Or choke on that clot in the back of your throat.) holding the towel under my nose.
Wouldn't you know it, the -the- nostril starts to bleed after a couple minutes. So, now, my nose is one big gushing fountain of -red-. I had to take up residence in the clinic bathroom until someone could see me. Granted, we got quite a jump on everyone else. Haha. Suckers. Anyways, nurse comes to get me, sits me down on a bench, and proceeds to find a nose clamp for this sorta thing. Guess what. Those fuckers? They'd probably work better as clothes pins. She slid it down to pinch my -nostrils- shut instead of finding a way to make it stay clamped at the bridge, where it should be. Fuck that, I'll choke and drown! So, off that comes. I'll hold my own.
Well, after another brief gush (Literally, my nose -squirted-), I made another trip to the washroom for another 5 or so minutes. I pulled the clot out (Not a good idea, normally, but I made an extreme exception for my case), and pinched it off again. While I'm pinching, I'm cleaning up. Finally, the doc's ready to see me. Great. The sooner we can determine what's going on, the better. So, he tries getting me to lean back. Again. Bad idea. Blood seeping back into throat, choking/drowning hazard. Yeah, you get the picture. Well, after a minute, I ask to get up and run to a sink. Instead, I get a pan. Okay, fine. Lean back again. He gets me to tilt my head back so he can check my nose out.
That didn't last very long. Grab the pan, and spit. If I had a camera, I'd show you the results of plugging your nose and/or leaning back. Needless to say, the results are never pretty, as I laid down the biggest glop of partially clotted/mucusy blood in that little pan.If it could spread further form it's gelled mass, it would've covered the bottom of that pan. If you want to impress a nurse, guys, that it is not the way to do it. If you wanna impress a doctor, on the other hand...
Finally, after all that and me trying to get comfortable enough so that I've got the pan close beside me, my bloodied towel on the other side of me, and a bib just in case, the Doc poked around and found a couple spots in both nostrils I was bleeding from. Now, normally, when a person gets a bloody nose, it happens closer to the back, where the nostrils enter the actual nasal cavity, and it makes it easier to stop it when you pinch and lean -forward- (I cannot emphasise thise enough, as I hear so many people leaning back!) because the blood vessel is close by. My situation, however, was a bit different, as the spots I was blooding from were close to the -front-, which kinda makes pinching a useless endeavor.
Continuing onwards: After that poking around and checking things out, he suggests cauterizing. What's the first thing to go through a person's mind when you hear that very word? Fire and/or a red hot metal rod, right? Lemme tell you, that was -the first- thing to enter my mind. But, no. It was a chemical cauterization, probably with a nitrous solution. Okay, cool. As if I'd let a hot shaft of steel or fire go anywhere near my face for -any- reason, medical or not. Nothing special. It's all done.
After another spit of a blood clot, and an prescription for a nasal cream, I was good to go.
Got a good laugh after the nurse saw what I left in that pan. She took one look after lifting the tissues I'd conveniently placed over top of it, and looked pretty grossed out. After that second clot, she looked surprised. "OH! THAT'S what that was!" Of course, she wasn't anywhere near when the first one came up.
I really hope this doesn't happen again. 3 hours of my night, completely wasted. And this had bette rnot prevent me from going out on Saturday night. I'm gonna be mighty pissed.
Edit:
